to expect ds's teacher

[claw3]

to try and understand his disorder and the problems he has because of it. He has modulation disorder, basically all of his senses are heightened and he is very defensive of touch and his body etc.

Ds's (4.5) first day at school on Monday, it had snowed during the night, first time he has experienced snow. He was ok with snow being on the ground, but didnt want to touch it. Anyhow while in the playground it started to snow, the snow was falling on his face and he freaked. I took him into the school building, teacher saw us waiting inside and told us we werent allowed to wait inside. I explained, but she told us to wait outside saying he had better get used to as he would have to go out in it later!

Today he has PE and will be expected to get changed into his PE kit. I commented to the teacher that she may have problems getting him to take his clothes off. She told me, he will learn.

agree with Cory and Littlefish. Bear in mind that despite the policy of inclusion, teacher training contains surprisingly little relating to SEN (this is changing nowadays), so the class teacher may never have heard of the SPD never mind the modulation disorder before you mentioned it.

for kids with language problems, a top tip given by a MNetter who is a SALT is to prepare a "communication passport" with information about the child to give to school etc - I wonder if it might be helpful if you knock up a pretty document with a photo on front (if you make it look pretty it will be more readable) with basics about your DS's sensory related needs.

You are dealing with it! You're dealing with it by finding out as much as you can, and finding out what you should be able to expect from the school.

Dealing with the emotions attached to it is another matter. That's where talking to other parents on mumsnet, particularly those who've been through something similar may help.

Claw3 don't be hard on your self, it is probably hard enough dealing with the everyday stuff that your ds's disorder throws at you! It is also easy to think that the professionals are there to help your ds... without you having to tell them what they need to do.

Good luck, my ds starts school after the holidays, and although we have lots of people involved with him, I generally feel like I don't have a clue!

Tclanger I like the passport idea... we could do with a starting school and sn info thread with tips and experiences from all - including teachers.

It is great seeing the supportive side of mn in action too

What a great idea for a thread Aefondkiss. It would be so helpful as a teacher to have more information about the concerns parents have so that we can try and make the transition as smooth as possible. Hopefully we teachers could contribute to it to say what sort of information we would like to have, and how that information is best shared etc. It would also be really good to share ideas about how best to develop good parent/TA/teacher relationships throughout the school etc.

I know that lots of parents (like Claw) would really appreciate hearing the experiences of other parents who've already been through it!

Claw - just a thought, but have you heard of Parent Partnership? They are a support service (a charity I think) set up to help parents with children with additional needs. They can attend meetings with you, advise you on protocol, rights etc. Your LEA or school will be able to give you details.

Just spoke to the OT, told her my ds was very eager to get to school on Monday and was really looking forward to it. This has now changed to 'no one likes me' 'school is boring' and he doesnt want to go. Packed lunches are returned home totally untouched (not even the drink).

Basically my ds has no IEP in place yet. I have been told its too early to do this. She has suggested i wait until the end of the week, then make an appointment to see the SENCO.

I love the passport idea, i had bookmarked it and will have a good look later. Thanks

Claw

I think it's really good that you have posted this; I had never heard of this special need and you are raising awareness by bringing it up. Please post regularly on the SN board or wherever, because I'm sure lots of people here would like to be kept updated on how your son gets on.

Good luck with everything!

Littlefish - Yes i seem to remember vaguely reading about parent partnership, i was under the impression this was given to parents who were having trouble with attendance etc.

Where was your ds before school? Did he have an IEP there? Good practice would be for the IEP to be handed on to school, and for the school to continue working on those targets until an early review.

My experience with parent partnership has been their attendance at annual reviews or IEP reviews when a parent wanted some additional support, or when a parent has wanted to query their child's provision at school and again, wanted some support from outside the school.

I'm sure that other people will be more informed than me

Claw, I found the following information for you.

Parent partnership services
All local authorities (LAs) have a duty to provide information, advice and support to parents of children with SEN. This should be provided by dedicated staff working separately from the LA's SEN team so you are assured that the advice and information is impartial, and that the people you are receiving it from are not involved in the SEN decision making process.

Some parent partnership services are based in the voluntary sector but most remain within the LA. Most services also offer access to Independent Parental Supporters (IPSs) who are volunteers trained to provide individual support to parents.

Contact your local council
Contact National Parent Partnership Network
What do parent partnership services do?
Most parent partnership services should offer you:

access to a confidential telephone helpline
impartial information and advice around SEN issues
support in preparing for and attending meetings
help in filling in forms and writing letters/reports
initial support in resolving disagreements with your child?s school and the LA
contact details for other statutory and voluntary services
links to local parent support groups and forums
the chance to submit your views, which will help inform and influence local policy and practice
training opportunities
Your child's school or your LA will have details of your local service. This information can also be found through the National Parent Partnership Network (NPPN).

Claw --you said
'I have been told he will not receive a statement, because he is extremely bright and has no learning disablities.'

Hmmmmmm. Don't take this as set in stone. We were firmly told this about our son (Asperger's, so at least something they'd heard of!) when he was about five or six. He now hs a statement giving him FULL time support, because although he is very bright, sometime startlingly so, the school environment is not one in which he can learn without help. If your son's condition is likely to cause him to be distressed, overloaded, ravenous and struggling whilst at school, he is not going to be able to concentrate (to put it mildly) and he WILL need dedicated extra help.

It's cheaper not to issue statements. You do, sadly, tend to have to push, shout, read up and chase people about it. Not all in the first week, though, and it sounds like you are already very much more on the ball than we were at that stage.

Good luck!

Good post Lancelotte.

Littlefish - He has never had an IEP. He was at nursery with no help. It has taken me 3 years to get this far, a long sucession of Dieticians, Paeds and GP, who all thought i was an over anxious mum basically. It was first thought he might be suffering with autism, this was ruled out.

We waited over a year to be referred to the OT and she seemed to know exactly what i was talking about (such a relief). He has only had 7 sessions so far. So very early days with DX. Obviously during that time i have been reading all i can to try and grasp an understanding.

Lancel - It has been suggested by OT and Paed that he maybe gifted and talented, so im basically laughed at when statements are suggested.

Hmmm. I'd query that about the statement. I can understand (just) why my dd who is physically disabled won't get one- because she can actually learn without support- but in your son's case, I think that might be worth pushing.

Claw,
Yep, mine is also on the G&T register. Doesn't matter. He still got the statement.

Thanks everyone im really grateful for all the info. Ive learnt more today from mn than i have anywhere else.

Lancel - Really, bloody hell. I will have to get reading about that. I really am a novice.

I have to go, off to Asda's to buy pants for ds. He simply doesnt like wearing them, they drive him to distraction. We shall be giving loose fitting boxers a try this time!

Will check in later, thanks again everyone, much appreciated.

Right, sorry for driving you ladies mad!

How would i go about getting a statement?

I know i can google, ask school etc, but they do tend to fob me off. I have found the experiences of other mns much more helpful.

Claw, may I just add something from a student teacher's POV?

I am appalled on our course at present at the absolute lack of SEN training we've had.

We get none, frankly and it isn't good enough. It is very likely that this teacher is the same and has no idea what problems your DS's condition brings.

If I was his teacher TBH, I'd not have known what issues your DS would have at school but I would have done some googling or suchlike before term (if I'd known in advance) and I'd have asked for a meeting with you... however, some teachers aren't so proactive

I hope you get it sorted - I am just sorry your DS has had such a sad introduction to school life

Thanks, good point. Until this thread, it didnt occur to me that the teacher may have not been given much info.

I think im feeling a bit defensive, as all ive had from most 'experts' and teachers is the attitude, that im either not strict enough with him or im being precious, until seeing the OT.