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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I'm 40 today and I'm trying really hard to have a nice time but my DH got me a cookbook

80 replies

VoluptuaGoodshag · 04/01/2009 15:34

He promised other things on the card but the shine has been taken off those already. God I feel so pathetic and childish but every other person seems to have made such a nice effort in sending me flowers and wee pressies.

I think I feel so sad that my nearest and dearest can't think of anything original or personal to get the person with whom he shares his life.

OP posts:
Original poster
VoluptuaGoodshag · 04/01/2009 19:40

I will have a party later in the year but it will be me again who does ALL the organising (as usual)

OP posts:
prettybutterfly · 04/01/2009 19:40

He got you Nigella!!!

Make an appointment with your solicitor first thing tomorrow!

pagwatch · 04/01/2009 19:41

it was quite funny...
"could you reach that cup for me darling"
"fuck off hoppy"
"could you help me get my shoe on"
"do it yourself you great numpty"

for about a week.

pagwatch · 04/01/2009 19:43

But Voluptua
the good thing about doing all the organising is that you get to do the organising....and that means fab. And then he can pay for it

Champagne all round...

pagwatch · 04/01/2009 19:44

sorry.
I appear to be a ponce...

fishie · 04/01/2009 19:45

volutua tell me about your deferred party. i wanted to have one this weekend but it was just a silly day to have it.

fishie · 04/01/2009 19:46

voluptua

girlandboy · 04/01/2009 19:47

Seems like there are a lot of mn 40th birthdays which are shite. Makes me feel slightly better that my dh is just as crap as the rest.

scaryteacher · 04/01/2009 19:49

It's easy - sort your own present out...I did in Antwerp - got the diamonds I wanted, whilst he paid. Same for the night in the hotel. I booked, he paid. He was abroad though, so there is some excuse!

FlowChart · 04/01/2009 20:32

girlandboy - sory to hear your DH is just as bad the rest! Share, please?

NotanOtter · 04/01/2009 20:41

lol at the Nigella faux pas!

Voluptua poor poor you - i really feel for you

I was having the worst time of my life around my 40th ( other things) so told everyone to ignore it - they did that WAS fine as i really meant it

HOWEVER!!! This xmas day and 'yes' i had told dp NOT to buy me anything because we need an AGA (yes need!)

Bu i got nothing just 'Troubleshooting tips for your aga' i think it is 5.99

I started off ok on the day but by 4pm had reverted to toddlerdom with comments such as 'ooh id that big one for me - check the label?' and on a couple of photos you can see the edge of a 'pout'.....

If i were you Voluptua - I would be online tonight...how about some Mac makeup or a pot of Eve Lom....French connection have a good sale....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY XXX

pointydog · 04/01/2009 20:43

happy birthday, voluptua.

And give your dh a clip round the ear

girlandboy · 04/01/2009 21:05

Flowchart - I wrote this near the start of this thread....

I got a small bunch of flowers (from the petrol station I think) and that was it. He worked for the airline bmi at the time and even qualified for free flights, but I got nothing. I waited all day for something to happen, but basically I got f-ck all. I honestly thought that something else must be coming later in the day, but there was nothing, nothing, nothing. I told him that I never wanted any flowers ever again. I had even dropped some really heavy hints about a weekend in Rome, but zilch. How hard can it be to book free flights?

Zebraa · 04/01/2009 21:20

Talk to him or this will fester into something nasty.

Happy 40th Birthday!!

PrammieMammy · 04/01/2009 21:25

Pick a dish and get him to make it for you.

Moondancer · 04/01/2009 21:32

Voluptua - happy birthday. Please try and salvage something of the day. Have you eaten yet? If not send him to the takeaway and order something special.

Moondancer · 04/01/2009 21:32

Voluptua - happy birthday. Please try and salvage something of the day. Have you eaten yet? If not send him to the takeaway and order something special.

Moondancer · 04/01/2009 21:33

OOps!

andyrobo237 · 04/01/2009 21:48

Happy Birthday!!

I am 40 this year, so I will keep this in mind and be really speciic about what I want!

Original poster
VoluptuaGoodshag · 04/01/2009 22:10

Shall have it when the weather is better and yes it will be great coz I organised it. But I'm fecking sick of organising everything for everyone else. For once I'd just like to be swept off my feet with no prompting. In all my 40 years I can think of the following as moments of surprise:

  • my ex buying a hippy ornament I'd admired in a shop
  • my pal organising a surprise trip to Ireland for my hen weekend
  • a Commodore calculator AND a stylophone for my 12th birthday

I'm beginning to think I have unrealistic expectations after reading all the other posts

OP posts:
NotanOtter · 04/01/2009 22:12

bless!

I had a commodore calculator - it was whitey grey with some red and blue buttons - was it that?

Original poster
VoluptuaGoodshag · 04/01/2009 23:28

It was exactly that! The display showed up in red with a black background.

Just like this one in fact

www.vintage-technology.info/pages/calculators/commodore/co784d.htm

OP posts:
cheshirekitty · 05/01/2009 19:54

Volp - sorry to rain on your parade, but my dm passed away a week before my 40th birthday, and she was buried the day after my 40th.

My dh was in the forces and couldn't even make her funeral.

So whilst I feel YANBU, there is always someone else worse off.

andyrobo237 · 05/01/2009 21:26

Cheshirekitty - while I am very sorry for your loss, I do not see the relevance to the op, and dont see why you feel the need to mention it, apart from to embarrass the op. There will always be someone worse off, that is just a fact of life.

Rindercella · 05/01/2009 21:41

Do you know Andyrobo, you took the words right out of my mouth.Hope you have had a nice day today Voluptua?

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