Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think another mum shouldn't just wander round my upstairs

36 replies

pickupthismess · 30/12/2008 20:43

Am I just being really uptight?

One of the mums locally has a very messy/child friendly (that is to say 'child dominated') house. That's fine but am really fed up with her treating our place the same. She lets her DS just have the run of our house.

Main gripe - last time she took her DS to the toilet attached to a bedroom upstairs. I knew I had dirty washing piled up there on the floor to be sorted and that the door was firmly shut as a result. So was really Even after she used it I could hear her in DS1's bedroom taking out toys for her DS to bring down. Said nothing but was really fed up. She's always angling to come over here but don't want her to TBH (DSs don't even really like her DS that much).

Am I being over sensitive?

OP posts:
mrsmaidamess · 30/12/2008 20:44

No, she sounds rude. I cant bear people who act like that. meet somewhere neutral next time.

VaginaShmergina · 30/12/2008 20:46

oooo not nice, dont like this at all. Yep suggest you meet for a coffee or are unusually busyand not able to get together.

Nasty nasty snoopy person not respecting others property and space !

YA most definatlely NBU

nancy75 · 30/12/2008 20:46

that is really rude (her not you), if you have to go upstairs in somebody house to use the toilet, you use the toilet and then come back down, not go for a nose round, i wouldnt be impressed

thisisyesterday · 30/12/2008 20:46

do you have a downstairs toilet? I tend to keep upstairs cordoned off with a stairgate if I have people over as upstairs is usually a mess lol

prettybutterfly · 30/12/2008 20:48

Think of her as a small child with no boundaries and give her some - kindly. I'm sure she's sweet, so don't freeze her out - hel her out.

prettybutterfly · 30/12/2008 20:48

or even "help" her out. Pfft!

DoubleBluff · 30/12/2008 20:49

really bad manners
wouldnt ask her agian if you are not that bothered about her, then she may take the hint

Original poster
pickupthismess · 30/12/2008 20:49

We have two downstairs toilets!! Our house is pretty big and it is hard to hear what she is up to. Difficulty is we live in a small hamlet and she is only down the road.

OP posts:
LaTrucha · 30/12/2008 20:49

Rudeness!

I often strategically close doors too

onepieceofbrusselssprout · 30/12/2008 20:50

Is that your only loo? (I am just being nosey btw) YANBU.

Sometimes when we go to the loo in a friend's home dd might bring a little bath toy down with her or something, I always say to the other mum that she has done this and ask dd to hand it over just in case the other mum does mind.

Snooping round is really bad. On the odd occasion we have been to someone's loo and they haven't had chance to clean/tidy, I always (out of respect to them iykwim) make sure we are in and out very quickly, to make sure no one thinks we are snooping/criticising.

VaginaShmergina · 30/12/2008 20:50

Tell her you are having problems with the upstairs loo and could she use one of the two downstairs ones !!

Blondeshavemorefun · 30/12/2008 20:50

maybe next time say use the toilet in bathroom

assume you have 2+ bathrooms/toilets as she used one that was attached to bedroom?

onepieceofbrusselssprout · 30/12/2008 20:51

Deffo agree with the stairgate tip. Preferably a stairgate that is tricky to open. Also if someone says they are going to the loo, immediately say, oh please don't go upstairs there are no clean towels up there (or whatever.)

If she makes a habit of this I would be tempted to mention on arrival that upstairs loo is possibly blocked or some other off putting statement.

Original poster
pickupthismess · 30/12/2008 20:56

Problem re stairgate is we have antique staircase and ballustrades, so can' attached a stairgate - even a pressure gate falls off. Thought shut door and four other bathrooms would have been message enough.

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 30/12/2008 21:05

your friend obv needs a sign on the door of the loo she can pee in

Original poster
pickupthismess · 30/12/2008 21:18

Yes and another one saying 'don't open this cupboard please'.

OP posts:
onepieceofbrusselssprout · 30/12/2008 21:20

How about "please don't open this door unless you are a really nosey cow - it is alarmed"!

VaginaShmergina · 30/12/2008 21:21

Have you any bedroom toys ?

Line them up next to your toothbrushes

Original poster
pickupthismess · 30/12/2008 21:30

Well at least I don't feel so completely anal now.

OP posts:
VaginaShmergina · 30/12/2008 21:35

Anal...... did I mention anything about anal ?

ScottishMummy · 30/12/2008 21:39

what a superb double entendre who needs to read post.love image of wanton upstair wandering

randomxmas · 30/12/2008 21:42

Just ask her not to go upstairs - be straight to the point to be sure she gets the message

DoubleBluff · 30/12/2008 21:43

Do you have a handsome male friend who could lie on your bed naked next time she visits?
So if shewanders in he can say 'o h hi was just waiting for pick up?'
That would shut her up.

ScottishMummy · 30/12/2008 21:45

hell why share handsome naked friend with nosy upstairs wanderer

lou33 · 30/12/2008 21:48

if i had a naked handsome friend in my bed i wouldnt be entertaining other guests, thats for sure