to be annoyed that dh has just told me he hasn't had time to buy me a present this year

[greenbeanie]

Money has been really tight so we have cut back but I have still managed to get things for him and the dc by buying bits over the last few months. I bought myself a couple of things in sales which he has kindly said he will wrap up to give me!!! He say he hasn't had time to get to the shops, he goes into town most weekends, or use the internet. It's not the money that matters, I didn't expect anything big but as they say it's the thought that counts

Actually I could care about being given presents for myself! It is not about money, or big things, or being materialistic; last year DH got me a DVD from play.com for a fiver but it was a thoughtful gift! It's a small but important courtesy between partners imo. Life is incredibly hectic, and busy, and hard work, and my DH and I make a conscious effort to appreciate each other, and thank each other for what we do, and spending a little time thinking of a present for each other on christmas and birthdays is a part of that.

Greenbeanie Snap! My birthday is early December, DP didn't get me anything as he 'didn't have time'. He has now bought christmas pressies for everyone - except me. And is saying that he doesn't want to go back down to Oxford street. SO no birthday present AND no CHristmas present. Totally feel like I'm suddenly at the bottom of his list of priorities.

YA sooo NBU.
btw - I dragged my extremely heavily pregnant, ill, dizzy, SPD afflicted self out and waddled around to get HIM a birthday present in August. Why did I bother?

omg andheaven!!! i would be so hurt...

Well...I would make clear to him that you are expecting a present, anything, that is a bit of a surprise...and he still has time...otherwise, tell him you will prepare dinner for yourself and the dc....but he won't be getting any

last year, dh and I said we would not give eachother any presents....and it was total rubbish...so, this year we said we going to get 10 £5 presents each...and we bought them over the year....

MrsGuy - you would have got on well with my exH and his family! They don't 'do' celebrations at all. As a result, DD never wants to spend birthdays or Christmas Day with her father and his parents as she says me and my parents are much more fun! I really love planning gifts for DP and DD - they don't have to cost a lot, it's just fun taking note through the year of little things that they like and won't expect. One of DP's hit birthday presents this year was a book of paintings connected to Shakespeare's plays. It cost £2 at a charity shop and he loved it.

It's not a matter of getting uptight about presents - it's getting uptight about what they symbolise - love, time and thought.

And you don't have to spend hours fighting the crowds down Oxford Street if you don't want to - most shops have websites and you can source lovely, inexpensive things on the net .

I can't make up my mind about this.

My dh is fantastic at giving me unexpected gifts throughout the year - my favourite perfume, a watch that I'd had my eye on for a while, earrings, even a freshwater pearl necklace; and I often get flowers (but not so often that it's not always a lovely surprise)...so this shows that he's thinking of me throughout the whole year, and makes me feel all warm and loved and special

And yet...there is still something a little bit sad about there not being a single present under the tree for me. It's not about the present itself, but I find it contrary that he is so thoughtful year-round, but on the one day you're "supposed" to buy a present for, he claims he doesn't have time or know what to buy me.

I do know that he doesn't have lots of time to go shopping, and he usually spontaneously buys me things he sees and thinks I'd like, rather than hunting for the perfect random gift for me.

And I am actually so easy to buy for! I like pretty much everything

I know it doesn't really matter, but still...sigh...

Rebel, have you told him? He sounds lovely, and maybe just needs a little tweaking in the right direction?

Thought you might like an update of what I actually got. Wait for it.... a pack of 5 pairs of knickers from Tescos with the price still on £2.50, 2 pairs of socks, price still on £1.99 and 2 Christmas tree decorations. So unfortunately no great surprise, although at least I got something. Anyone else do any better!!!!

this guy sounds like a reeel ladies man.

get him deodorant or a toothbrush next year and go out for Christmas lunch in a nice hotel without him. Take the kids obviously.

oh Greanbeanie - that really does beat my worst gift from my exh - don't know whether to or . Actually, I would wrap up his USED toothbrush next year!! Has he no shame?? What did you say?