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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that independant schools should not fundraise when the kids ahve so much more to start with?

79 replies

islandofsodor · 15/12/2008 13:25

So far this term we have been asked to buy wildly expensive Chritmas cards designed by our children, contribute a jar to the Christmas fayre, take in bags of stuff to be sold by a psudo charity and collect Morrisons/Sainsbury's whetever vouchers and send in a donation towards the swimming pool refurbishment.

The parents association is always organising something. Now I don;t mind the 2nd hand uniform shop as that helps parents out who may struggle to afford the uniform but I always take my supermarket voucehrs in to another local primary school.

AIBU?

OP posts:
georgimama · 15/12/2008 16:17

But you obviously do have issues with the school because you feel it necessary to hide the fact that your child goes there.

Whilst you may not wish to come across to other parents as thinking you're better than them, frankly that isn't actually important and other people's reactions to a perfectly normal choice for your child are not your problem. Your family's attitude says it all really... I don't understand why that attitude is considered in the least bit acceptable. If I said "I'm not sending my child to state school, it's just for thick, poor, ugly people" I'd be crucified and quite rightly.

pagwatch · 15/12/2008 16:19

We'll have to disagree then

If you love the school my view is that you should support it. You say you can't afford it but also that you would choose not to.

Just hope that other parents don't have the same view or it may not still be there when you want your DD to go into 6th form.

happywomble · 15/12/2008 16:56

I think its ok if the stuff is optional like making cakes for Xmas fair, going to quiz night etc.

The thing I hate at DDs prep school is that all proceeds of the second hand uniform sale go to the PTA nothing goes to the person who has paid for the uniform. The uniform costs a fortune to buy new so I think its wrong for the school to take all the money from selling it.

Its as if they think people are so well off at the school they can afford to buy a new set of uniform for their DC every year, costing £100s and then give it away to the school funds.

pagwatch · 15/12/2008 16:59

happy
you should raise that with them

My Dcs have been to several schools between them and i have never heard of them doing that.
It will discourage people from bothering to sell on and parents need second hand option.

dilemma456 · 15/12/2008 19:41

Message withdrawn

GrimmaTheNome · 15/12/2008 19:47

I like the school uniform proceeds going to the PTA. Parents who donate uniforms can of course benefit by buying some second-hand kit; I'd feel silly getting £2.50 back for something being resold for a fiver.

Our school does a variety of fundraising - some is for whiteboards etc, some is for external charities eg local children's hospice. Seems fine to me!

TotalChaos · 15/12/2008 19:51

DS is at state primary, and I went to indie secondary, and I have some sympathy for the OP for being irritated by the fundraising, and giving vouchers to state schools. We used to roll our eyes a bit at the termly envelopes sent home we were meant to bung cash in for the "school fund". One girl put buttons in it before returning it. If the school can't afford the facilities, wouldn't it be more sensible to raise the fees slightly rather than fundraise?

hollyivypoppy34 · 15/12/2008 19:52

yabu - a lot of independent schools use this kind of thing to fund places for kids who maybe can't afford it/strugglign with fees, new faciilities etc

deste · 15/12/2008 20:03

My two went to a very posh school and we regularly got asked for money for the new school building fund. We couldn't give them any as we were struggling along but knew there were plenty of oil barrons who could and did. We were never penalised. We went to the school fair etc and did our bit that way.

Ronaldinhio · 15/12/2008 20:14

yabu and acting very strangely toward a school that you chose to send your kids to...this was not forced upon you

Equally any fund raising is not forced upon you..seems like a bit of a blah about nothing

Original poster
islandofsodor · 15/12/2008 20:20

5% of fee income is used to fund bursaries.

PTA fundraising is solely for extras.

This raises the case then that should any remotely educational activity for children be allowed to fundraise.

Should I be allowed to fundraise for the relatively well off kids who come to our educational activity to improve the facilities we give them.

IS it ethical for Eton to fundraise to buy new books or whatever (rather than provide a bursary.)

Had the tender in for the refurb of the pool at work today that's what made me think of this.

OP posts:
Ronaldinhio · 15/12/2008 20:22

what???

benandoli · 15/12/2008 20:24

My friend teaches at a private school and they have no resources. When the PTA ask the teachers what they would like the head wont let them ask for the basics they really need because he is too embarrassed! Private schools are full of bullies and the bullied as well as sen kids who cant cope with stste schools.

georgimama · 15/12/2008 20:29

I don't think it's really fair to start knocking Eton, that school does a lot for charity, like most other top flight public schools.

Original poster
islandofsodor · 15/12/2008 20:31

I'm not knocking Eton but should a school like that morally have the right to fundraise for a new whiteboard in the same way as a struggling school in a deprived area?

For those who think I object to PTA's full stop I have been a governor at a state primary before we moved house and been Chair of a local charity comittee too so I know the hard work that goes into raising money.

OP posts:
Ronaldinhio · 15/12/2008 20:34

what are you talking about?
"moral right"

Have you gone quite mad?

Each school has a right to operate as it sees fit..as does each parent when chosing whether or not to contribute

Why is this such an issue for you?

georgimama · 15/12/2008 20:35

Yes of course a school has the right to fundraise amongst the parents who they (understandably if mistakenly in your case) assume actually support them! You don't have to contribute!

Are you saying it should be illegal for private schools to fundraise amongst their clientele? You are becoming a bit odd now...

GrimmaTheNome · 15/12/2008 20:38

a moral right to fundraise

It would only be wrong if the fundraising was trying to extract money from the deprived area.

I think fundraising - in whatever sort of school - is a way for those who can afford it to contribute a bit more for 'extras' than those who can't. More progressive than just raising the fees across the board, surely?

Original poster
islandofsodor · 15/12/2008 20:38

It's not an issue for me per se, but an intersting moral issue in the wider world and it could be taken to mean that anyone who provides anything remotely educational or for the benefit of anyone else regardless of whwther they are actually in need can do the same.

The government has been trying to take away indie school charitable status after all.

Should private hospitals be able to fundraise to buy new equipment then?

OP posts:
Original poster
islandofsodor · 15/12/2008 20:40

Its a good job this isn't my 1st post lol as you all obviously think I'm bonkers.

I can't beleive no-one has thought of this issue before. it is something that has been at the back of my mind for years whenever we have had requests for things.

OP posts:
georgimama · 15/12/2008 20:41

Surely a school or hospital is always in need of more money? The private school or hospital might be able to cope with 500 pupils or 5000 patients with what they've got, but with more money could do so much more. You seem very hung up on the whole private/state issue, for me, I don't give a toss, as long as I and my family get what we need. If the state cannot or will not provide, we go private.

Ronaldinhio · 15/12/2008 20:42

Is this a question pertaining to whether or not where you work should be allowed to fundraise to purchase new equiptment rather than be expected to run and budget like an ordinary organisation simply because children use the facility?

Original poster
islandofsodor · 15/12/2008 20:44

I have confused with regards to me talking about work.

I have two jobs.

In the day I work for a builders.

At weekends I work for an organisation providing chidlren's activities that they have to pay for.

OP posts:
GrimmaTheNome · 15/12/2008 20:45

Actually, I don't think the gov. is hellbent on taking charitable status away from indie schools - the process appears to be to try to ensure that schools (and other institutions) are deserving of that status. Some need to buck their ideas up, but they are supposed to be given time and ideas to help. Any institution claiming charitable status should have to go through this (especially churches which are often pretty darned self-serving and may fundraise for purposes that some of us may consider quite reprehensible ... but thats a whole different debate!)

Fivesetsofschoolfees · 15/12/2008 20:48

The PTA will be fundraising for 'extras'. Whether you buy what they are offering is totally up to you. If you have to scrape together the fees, then be happy that there are those who are willing to give a little bit more to enhance your child's education.

PTA fundraising is a way for those who can afford to make voluntary contributions to the school.