AIBU to think that when I ask dh for a specific present he shouldn't buy something completely different?

[LadyLauraStandish]

Dh is worse than useless at buying presents.

'twas my birthday.

I showed him these earrings

onyx earrings

He bought me something remarkably like this

peridot pendant

Am I missing something - are these two things is any way alike? Or is he missing a few brain cells?

makes sense to me
success. so buy same.

Ooh, Laura, I'll have your green pendants if you don't want them.

I can swap them for my snakes - for those of you who haven't heard the snake story, it goes as follows:

(As reported to me by BF, 3 weeks before my birthday many years ago)

DH: What can I get LC for her birthday?
BF: There's a lovely stall in Covent Garden that does solid silver dragon and unicorn (hey, it was the early 90's) necklaces and earrings, she'd love that. Why don't we go together and I'll show you where it is?
DH (in cold sweat at idea of doing both public transport and shopping): Erm, I'll think about it.
BF: Just let me know - any weekend!

Cut to 27 days later, late night shopping in our local town centre. DH dashes into H. Samuels. I can only imagine the conversation went something like this:

DH: Have you got any dragon or unicorn jewellery?
Spotty youth on counter: Nah, mate.
DH (in muck sweat of panic): Nothing? I need to get some dragons or unicorns for my wife's birthday tomorrow!
SYOC (smelling desperation in the air): we got snakes, mate.
DH: Snakes?
SYOC: Yeah, mate - 9 carat gold. Quality!
DH (rationalising snakes/dragons, dragons/snakes, it's all the same): I'll take them!

At the time, I only wore silver.

What BF suggested looked like this

What I got resembled these only tackier.

I find it funny now...

funny NOW. ha ha.

Oh those are nasty, lovecat!!!! But did he buy them more than once?

I'm thinking of asking him to exchange the peridot pendant - dare I? What might I get instead? It might be too nerve-wracking.........

Message withdrawn

No, I think my reaction to them was such that I scared the poor bugger witless and now he needs either the catalogue reference no., the exact internet shop link, or to be taken by the hand into the shop, pointed at the item and then left alone for five minutes (if I left him for longer than that I'd get 'unusual' tights or something instead...)

I never get surprised anymore, which is a shame, but on the whole I think I prefer my method!

Actually, now I come to think of it, when we still did each other stockings at Christmas I would get at least 3 of every item - ie, 3 different purses, 3 different types of bath bomb, 3 pairs of comedy socks... men obviously think more is better, don't they?!

Oh that rings a bell, lovecat - one year I got three scarves for Christmas!!! Is 3 a magic number?

6 bottles of vitamin pills is hilarious, dilemma!

When I was young my dad asked what he should get my mum for xmas,i showed him a gold watch in a jewellery store that mum loved.
On Xmas day mum unwrapped a pair of ivory horn style ornaments with the 3 wise monkeys
engraved on them,they were the ugliest things i had ever seen. Every so often you would hear my mum shreik "F*ing horns " in an amazed and disgusted voice, was very funny, Dad ,of course thought they were fab,but wisely bought her the watch for her birthday in January

You see, that's what I don't understand.

How can they not buy the right thing when you have actually pointed it out to them?

Thing is, I like surprises. But not if they are the wrong thing [awkward]. I mortally offended DH once by thinking expensive (for us at the time) earrings were a cheap make-weight and that my real present was still to come.

His shopping philosophy now is that he only shops in places which wrap things up for him. This is an excellent quality control measure and I have some very nice jewellery as a result. It does make life harder when what I really want is a Kenwood or Kitchenaid mixer, though .

I asked repeatedly for a circle diamond pendant in the window of Ernest Jones. If there was a present giving occasion and he asked me what i wanted, I would say the circle pendant in Ernest Jones.

I had a birthday, a Christmas and a Valentine's day of getting various different diamond Ernest Jones pendants before he gave in and bought it for me the next Valentine's day. He is very generous and I am grateful for my beautiful jewellery, but you know when you just think FFS get the hint!!

Smurfgirl, I feel your pain. What goes on in their heads? At least you got diamonds, as opposed to an array of green things.................

I know I sound so ungrateful.
I have a 2x diamond heart pendant, a diamond twist pendant and finally my circle pendant ! Which I am wearing now.

Smurfgirl...I answered your holiday thread!!

Well yes, I know I sound ungrateful too but you know what, enough green already!!!!!!

It depends on whether you think the receiving of presents is the same as shopping on Amazon. IE you place your order and that is what you get . Perhaps your DH thought he would like to use his own judgement a little and make the gift more of a surprise.

Ooooh! I love green things!! [hsmile] Not at all helpful!!

Better than a playboy necklace from argos that was threatened for xmas last year!! FFS!! Am I 13 with fake boobs blonde hair and massive white teeth???? Hey??

Ha!! Meant not halloween still is it??

maybe he's bought you both?..you know, will surprise you with the present you really wanted.

You see, OrmIrian, I don't want my dh using his own judgment. His own judgment has resulted in:
(1) 3 woolly scarves - the same design, but in black, brown and beige;
(2) a dressing gown fit only for a great grandmother and which was several sizes too big;
(3) A book about cats (what the hell was that about?);
(4) an array of perfumed things from The Body Shop - I can't wear perfume, it gives me a rash.

etc, etc, etc, etc.

This is why I tell him what to buy. Because he hasn't a clue.

I think YABU. He has given it some thought and got you a present; I thought the point of a gift is to have something the person giving has decided on and thought about; if you want a specific pair of earrings, get em yourself!

My Mum said "what would you like for Christmas?"

I said there was a specific bedding set DP and I would like from Next to go with our bedroom colour scheme, it is £55 so we'd be happy with it as a joint present and nothing else: Bedding set

So, she's getting us this:
Bedding set

Bless her. I suspect it's all down to money, which is fine, I'd rather then that she got us £15 of vouchers that we could put towards the one we actually like.

Horrible, ungrateful BIFM?

I just accidentally checked the 'purchased' section of my Amazon wishlist. Now I know what I am getting for Christmas, I think - shame I went in to swap one of the things for a better value one I had spotted

They should have a "don't tell me, I like surprises" button on those things.

he got the jewellery bit and it was supposed to be a colour - so he probably thought he did really well!

and plus points if he actually went to the shop to get them for you - shows dedication. As opposed to buying on-line.

shop assistants can be pretty persuasive too - you never know what they said to him to get him to change his mind! The pendant is lovely though.