To think this mother is being a bit precious?

[cali]

Dd 1 was supposed to have gone to a birthday party this afternoon.
The mum of the child whose birthday it was phoned me a couple of hours before the party was due to start and had the following conversation with me.
"How's dd1 after her chickenpox last week?"

I reply, "Fine, spots are all scabbed over and are beginning to disappear'

She then asks if I could hide the scabs as one of the other mums whose dc's are also going to the party is completely paranoid about her children coming into contact with any illness whatsoever.
She said I know dd1 isn't infectious any longer but this person really wont be happy if she sees any sign of chickenpox.

Dd1 had chickenpox everywhere and has several large scabs on her face as well as numerous small scabs, there is no way i could cover them up and I was not about to put makeup on a 3 year old to hide the fact she had recently had chickenpox.

So, dd1 who is now completely well, missed her friend's party, all because of this silly mother and her paranoia.

Just needed to have a rant as when I told dd1 she couldn't go, she was really upset and said "but mummy, I've been a good girl"

probably abu, but felt ever so slightly p'd off about this.

Surely the mother who was being precious about her dc being exposed should be the one to have kept her child back if she was that worried...?

My mother always said a good bit of clean dirt never hurt anyone and my dc are pretty healthy. They have the odd cold and rarely have any V&D bugs, yet they are not wrapped in cotton wool.

I appreciate there are those people whose immune systems are compromised but I feel it their responsibility to manage that. If that mother was not prepared to take the risk that the OP's dc's spots were scabbed over then that is HER responsibilty not the OP's.

Cali, absolutely!

I knew there was something not right about the situation but couldn't put my finger on it in time for the first post.

Sorry if I came across overly critical initially. Your response was very reasonable too.

Your friend sold you and your DD out because she didn't dare stand up to other woman. Annoying but in a funny way shows how close you are, as we often put upon those we know/love best than those we aren't close to!!!

Wonder what she'd have done if you'd said "well, you need to get on the phone to paranoid mum and tell her my DD isn't contagious but will be at the party, so she can make her decision as to whether or not she risks her DC attending"...

Anyway. Why not start a new AIBU about your so-called friend who only told you on the day of the party that effectively your DD was not welcome cos some other mum had an issue with long-gone CP

You know CP can have some nasty side effects. In the US they immunise against it. I was immunised because a pre-pregnancy check showed that I had not had it.

YANBU. My sisters didn't get chickenpox until their early teens, by which time it was very painful for them and from which they still bear visible scars, so if no-one is genuinely vunerable and at serious risk then best to get it over and done with, I think.

the thing is if my dc was still scabby i wouldnt want to take them to a party-infectious or not they still have scabs

Another advantage for healthy children to have chicken pox when they are young (apart from a less serious attack) is to avoid the illness coinciding with things like important exams.

The number of my friends who had chicken pox during exam time or revision time always made me glad I had it in early childhood.

cali's dd was no longer infectious. She should have been allowed to go.