to think that my childminder is supplying drugs to my wife...

[ILoveMyTrain]

I have an older wife who is about the same age as our childminder. My childminder is very odd, she says she is a grandmother but no-one has ever seen evidence of children, she lives in a dingy basement flat near the river and has a dummy in her front room that she talks to and dresses up. so I have always thought she ws a bit odd.
My wife is a taxi driver but only ever seems to have one fare a day, and then she never seems to have made any money. She has been known to spend hours ferrying one passenger across town. I wonder if she is going off and getting waster with our CM and this is where all the money goes?
She is weirdly happy for someone in such a low wage job and although she seems to have plenty of time in the mornings she hardly ever gets up in tiem to take our DD to the CM.

What do you think?

I know that castle bloke, he sold me my hat!

Ivvvvyy, Huh?!?!

You lot know nothing! I have a bear family lives near me - the mother ALWAYS has her camera rolling and never talks! That kid of hers (the bear that is) freaks me out ith his knowledge of "stuff".

The next door neighbours, sarah and Justin - always up to no good in the garden! Water hose - wasting good water! Think they are terribly funny, but I tell you one of them is going to do themselves an injury one of these days, you mark my words!

Granny Murray is definitlty on speed. She is manic not to say nauseating. Always thought the setup rather odd. No wonder they all get lost in Edinburgh/glasgow/Newcastle. But it is the horrifying sight and sound of Granny Murray that really did my head in.

www.bbc.co.uk/cbeebies/billandben/ they so smoked the weed........

It's not even good speed. Does her house look tidy? I think not.

Eaten too much Honey Pie, pushchair?

That's it. Get it all up. You'll feel better for it.

yes -- come + away + in --- just 3 words that don't go together.

now, does the lunatic want them to come, or go away?

You can't possibly away in, you can come in for sure, but not away in!

I love my train, your little Lisa is going to be terribly messed up when she is older with all the coming and awaying, she won't know where she is! Poor lass! Ans maybe you ought to think about getting her a jumper that looks a little less like your CM's here

'Come away in' is scottish usually closely followed by "you'll have had your tea"
However from Granny Murray becomes scary invite to another dimension

Red Sparklers, I hope one of them has nits!

Gosh it's a dark and desperate world out there. I know a girl who is always being hassled by her bloke (who is some sort of feckless wanderer with a mohican and a boat) to go for a 'bouncy ride' on public transport! Perverted I called it but she doesn't seem to mind.

i reckon she's his 'beard'...

really do you think so? I must say I can't see what she sees in him but it's better than the alternatives - the blokes over the way who regularly lose their trousers!!!

northernlurker, now i'm confused!
mohican, boat, beard? blokes losing trousers???
?
?
?
?
?

itng

Oh come on - what if i add birds singing in the trees, a very colurful airship (which crashes a lot and the passengers have to sort it out EVERYTIME) and two families who live next door to one another and have more children than they have room for!

Council estate where everyone is on acid?

I can't take DS for breakfast down the caff any more. Not only does the food take forever to arrive and look wierd and taste all wrong, but the chefs seem to spend an awful lot of time laughing rather artificially and spurting cream on each other. I worry that they are in an abusive civil partnership situation.

one pontipine
two pontipine
three pontipine.....
five hundred and sixty-nine pontipine.....

Ooooh! ooh! ooooo! UUUuuuh! Oooher! -- they filmed someone having an orgasm right?

Next thing you know it'll be that Russel Brand reading the bedtime stories...

Our local undertaker has taken to dressing in white and has had a vacuum nozzle grafted onto his arm.

And I keep hearing voices coming out of the sofa.

Things are going wrong....

when is russell reading bed time stories?

Does anyone else think that Auntie Mabel has let herself go dreadfully? And hanging round the Queen Vic of all places?