to think that Learning An Instrument is a bit of a useless skill?

[morningpaper]

.... ?

It seems to be something that cheery middle-class mummies with too much time on their hands foist upon their (mainly female) children.

What is the point of it REALLY in this day and age? They don't need to trill something tuneful on the piano to snare a husband - is it REALLY worth the time and money for some very specific and probably fairly useless skills?

and I strongly disagree that it's cheery middle-class mummies. Lots of them are over-serious and torn-faced.

Well DD is about to learn how to play the piano - when I finally get round to booking the lessons. She is having the paino for Christmas.

She isn't going to have lessons because I think it is some useful skill. She is having lessons because she has been asking for a couple of years and is really keen to get started. Can't see why it is any different to having dancing or drama lessons, or going to any other type of club really.

I am sooo glad I learned at school, as I play weekly at church, in occassional groups for special occassions, and LOADS of Christmas Carol Concerts

I play the cello clarinet and sing

yanbu

Has anyone mentioned it's good for your brain to learn music? Just the same as it's good for your brain to be bi-lingual from an early age....

haven't the energy to read this whole thread so am probably repeating...
YABTandVU. it teaches co-ordination, enhanced bilateral skills and concentration. Plus manual dexterity.

FGS.

If more boys were taught the piano they might be better at multi-tasking.

I have also not read all the thread but would like to add to Thumbwitch's list of advantages the fact that there is a correlation between musical ability and maths. I think in part it is to do with working with patterns and frequency and loads of other stuff I don't understand.

Singing is supposed to be a very good way of reinforcing learning as well. In fact the teachers at DS's school have done a course based on this recently.

FWIW - DS1 is learning the clarinet. He wants to do it because he likes his lessons. Unfortunately, he doesn't like to practice so I would rather he gave up than have a row with him every week but he is insistent.

So, no MC mummy foisting anything on anybody here. Besides I have a DS. YABU.

Niecie - I was shocking at doing my piano practice too but would never stop my lessons and am so glad I took them. Ok, I would never become a concert pianist but hey! I play for myself, enjoy it and so it was worth it to me.

I also took double bass lessons (at school), clarinet lessons (just after leaving school) and 'cello lessons (a few years later). And I never put the requisite amount of practice into it to become really good, but I have the skills to play the instruments and can when I want to.

I suppose that is what I am hoping for DS, thumbwitch. He will never be great as he has dyspraxia and it is really hard for him to coordinate blowing and fingers but he really doesn't want to give up. I want him to enjoy it and have a sense of achievement but I just want a bit of effort on his part.

I wouldn't mind the lack of effort if it weren't for the fact that he is currently borrowing a school music service clarinet and really wants me to buy one for him and I am not convinced it is worth it - they are very expensive.

Oh, I am a mean mummy.

no, i understand your frustration but you need to change your expectations of him - he is achieving by enjoying playing it!

As far as buying him one is concerned, well, why can't he contribute some of his pocket money towards it if he wants it that badly? Or you can hire them here; or buy a relatively cheap one here for example, or get one second hand, although some of these are more expensive. Look through the classifieds in the local rag, or Exchange and Mart (or even ebay if you can bear it!)

I know our local music shp does a 0% interest payment plan on instruments. Is there one locally that does the same?

sorry, niecie - didn't mean to sound so bossy! But I really believe he is getting a lot out of it if he enjoys it, whether he practices lots or not, and will benefit longterm from it. It should be therapeutic for his dyspraxia anyway?

I've a very musical (sings all the time loves listening to music) but untrained son of 8. Decided against any formal training until he could write properly. Then went for sociable music like choir. He's just picked up sight reading just from singing in a group. Now he's started on violin - a bit hit and miss, he's not got fine motor skills. HOWEVER, he's got the ear, so he's interested in getting it to make a good sound. DD1 aged 6 however, has insisted on starting violin she shares lesson with a friend, they love it. She's already better than DS1 8 yrs. Very glad its still all so lighthearted, don't think I could stand to supervise piano practice as well as 3 kids' homework. But I do want a piano. Just to remember what I learnt. Never got past grade 4, but feel a bit more likely to practice now that I'm grownup. We sing all the time in our house. The children have turned out very loud and noisy.

enjoyment. Long as the child chooses. ds1 chose to learn piano at 13. he loves it and we found a teacher who understands we aren't interested in exams or perfect technique but that it should be fun.

Well I grew up learning the piano and did all the grades, then went on to do the diploma in my twenties, I can honestly say many people are envious of the ability and it is marvellously therapeutic. If your children are musical I would encourage it wholeheartedly but then I always did enjoy it thoroughly and never was forced or had to be forced to attend lessons, practise etc.

I hope my son will enjoy lessons from me when he is a bit older, I would hope to teach him the piano myself and then he could hopefully learn a second instrument separately as I think music is a fantastic outlet and am so glad I have it in my life!

So I only have good words to say and I do think even if they only go to grade 5 and then give up at least they can read music which is no bad thing....

Agree with Smithagain

And would add that playing piano and violin and singing (dd same as you Smith) have all given dd a good ability at maths, there is a big connection in the brain between music and maths.

Art and music, far from being useless, open up the head in a way that nothing else can. Even literature comes second as you may not know the language. Art and music cut across all barriers.

I could go on for ever on this subject but won't.

Know people who are struggling to fit in piano practice with all other commitments. I felt that they had started their children too early and it was going to take a lot of further input to keep momentum going. Their kids were good at piano, violin etc, but tensions about practice, no time left for other children other activities, meant inevitably music lessons would peter out or be straw/camel back. Group school instrument lessons, cheap and cheerful in school hours can be real godsend when you are putting your toe in the water. Or there's a Saturday music school round corner from us, which does all instruments, orchestras bands in one place, 4-18. EJMS. But we have only just begun...

I started singing in a choir when I was 8. Aside from loving to sing, and learn to read music, putting on shows and doing concerts, I made lots of friends, we went on trips, met other choirs, had singing weekends and workshops where we camped out at schools, and had marvellouse fun! (A little bit like "band camp" ) I even travelled to York (from north norway) to do a show at (then?) Thameside theatre with an English choir. I marvelled at partaking in British School dinner, which was new and fascinating, and just blew my mind! It gave me so much.

I have a really good voice. I can sing 1-3rd alto. I have a very deep and sexy voice, I sound like your regular jazz singer.
My dh was well and truly smitten when I sang "Lover man" to him.....

When my son announced (age 4) that he wanted to play the violin, I was surprised, but happy. His teacher is amazed he is learning really quickly. He enjoys it, he has practiced together with other string players recently, and really loved it.

Why music? It is FUN and sexy.

Playing an instrument can be a great source of pleasure to many people and learning to play apparently has lots of side benefits to general cognition.

I, however, hate music. So will not be going down that route with DD unless she absolutely insists.

You surprise me MP, you normally seem so sensible

Of course YABU. Music brings pleasure and it is possible to make a career from it. But most importantly it teaches children patience and commitment and they learn that if they put the effort into something it pays dividends.

DH is a guitar teacher (and many of his students are not middle class, quite the opposite in fact). One of his students was terribly bullied at 11. He is now 14, one of the best students DH has and is no longer bullied. Being good at the the guitar has given him so much self esteem he is like a different child. And I have many stories like that.

And also, sorry to point out the obvious but if people didn't learn to play instruments we wouldn't have any music

So YABU!

I wont serenade you then, Anna!
How can you HATE music?

[puzzled emoticon]

Couldn't you say the same about ballet? These things encourage children to appreciate the arts and as such, have value imo. They also encourage the development of other skills and interests.

However, forcing something not enjoyed by the child is unkind, and selfish. My ex-H and his sisters HAD to play at least one instrument and complete up to grade 5 at least. He is still quite angry about the (equally legitimate) activities that he would like to have chosen, but which were all denied him because he had to practice or play in the orchestra. Very unfair imo.

I find it incredibly disturbing - I can't think when there is music on. I have to move away/go to another room.

The only time it works for me is at the cinema.