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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that a 5 & 6 yo should not be left home alone, even for half an hour.

53 replies

mummy2henry · 09/11/2008 21:44

I was in the supermarket this morning with ds and bumped into my cousin. She has 2 dcs (age 5 & 6) but they weren't with her so i asked if they were at their dad's house today?
She replied no, I just left them at home watching the tv!
I was at this as leaving a 5 & 6 yo old home alone is absolutley crazy imo.
I just said oh right when she told me, and really had to bite my tongue.
AIBU to think that she was being completly irresponsible? Or would you leave your children in the house by themselves at this age?

OP posts:
elsiepiddock · 09/11/2008 21:45

You're right - she's very, very wrong

nell12 · 09/11/2008 21:46

YANBU, but you know that already

nametaken · 09/11/2008 21:48

I always think these things depend on the child. Some children are more mature than others and can be left watching telly for short periods.

Have to say though, if your children are at school all day and at their dads every other week-end you've got plenty of opportunity to do your shopping then.

She'll probably turn into one of those pensioners who stay home all week and then go shopping at the week-end and complain about all the kids around

Original poster
mummy2henry · 09/11/2008 21:51

Haha, the supermarket was full of them too.

OP posts:
singyswife · 09/11/2008 21:53

No I would NEVER do this. My local shop is literally across the road from me and even if I was nipping over for milk I would take the dc's with me, what was she thinkin???

Hulababy · 09/11/2008 21:53

I have never met a 5 or 6 year old who is mature and grown up enough to be left home alone for any great length of time. They are all very much in the learning and experimenting when given the chance stage. TBH two together would be worse then one on its own in my experience.

She IMO she was wrong to do it.

If anything went wrong and the chldren were hurt, even accidently in this time, she could be charged with child neglect.

SueW · 09/11/2008 21:56

I know people who do it in other countries e.g. Switzerland. But then their children also walk to school without parents and that would most people over here.

Pawslikepaddington · 09/11/2008 21:56

I won't even go to the car or bin without dd-if she is awake I'm scared she'll fiddle with the gas knobs/hurt herself, and if she's asleep I'm scared she will wake up and worry (the car and bins are at the end of the road). Think this is force of habit though and need to grow out of it.

nametaken · 09/11/2008 21:56

I agree with Hulababy - 2 on their own worse than one. I have 3 dcs and my youngest would definately have been mature enough to be left for one hour. If I had left any of the other 2 though I wouldn't have had a house to come back to

Not like me I know, but I'm gonnna sit on the fence this one time.

FairyMum · 09/11/2008 21:57

I left my DD home alone when she was 6. I would never leave any of my other children alone at that age. It depends on the child and circumstances.

frasersmummy · 09/11/2008 21:58

is it at all possible she was being sarcy??

It sounds like the kinda thing I would say

Original poster
mummy2henry · 09/11/2008 21:59

I have no idea what she was thinking singyswife! i've always thought of her as quite an intelligent responsible person. Suppose we all do stupid things from time to time.
But its mad i'd never do it because you never know what mischeif dcs can get up to while your away. i could never forgive myself if anything happened.

OP posts:
nametaken · 09/11/2008 22:00

Yeah, I do that too frasersmummy

I also tell my kids we can't afford to do blah blah blah because I spent all the family allowance on vodka and fags and if they fall over and get a bruise I tell them to tell their teacher I beat them coz they wouldn't clean the house fast enough.

It's wrong really isn't it

Original poster
mummy2henry · 09/11/2008 22:00

No she wasn't being sarcy!

OP posts:
ledodgy · 09/11/2008 22:01

It does sound like she was joking.

singyswife · 09/11/2008 22:06

My dh is really nasty and takes it in turns to tell the kids we prefer the other one and also that he is going to trade me in for a younger model. Fortuntely they have grown up with him doing this and actually feel totally safe that we all love each other. Arent parents nasty.

frasersmummy · 09/11/2008 22:07

lol at nametaken

frasersmummy · 09/11/2008 22:07

lol at nametaken

Plonker · 09/11/2008 22:54

"is it at all possible she was being sarcy??
It sounds like the kinda thing I would say"

Me too!! ...that was just what i was about to say

Ok, assuming there was no sarcasm, YANBU! No way would i leave my 5yo alone - Jeez, i would have no house left!

dizzydixies · 09/11/2008 22:56

never mind the child's behaviour, what if there was a fire or someone came to the door etc etc

poor kids

HRHSaintMamazon · 09/11/2008 23:05

not only is it wrong but she if someone were to call Social services

no child, however mature should be left at home alone at aged 6. if she nipped to the corner shop i would advise that you speak to her and suggest she not do it again. but she was at a supermarket! and your description doesn't suond as though this was the first time she has done this.

edam · 09/11/2008 23:05

Of course YANBU. I really do hope she was joking.

Blondeshavemorefun · 09/11/2008 23:28

YANBU at all

but was she joking? is there a dad in the picture?

maybe a friend had them

prehaps you could ask when you next see her or ring her and say that you were worried and was she joking?

if she did then this to me is neglect - ANYTHING could happen to them

so no I wouldnt leave 5 and 6 in house alone to go to shops

debzmb62 · 10/11/2008 00:17

first and formost omg no way ! secondly its actually against the law "
she might of been joking i went to get my 8 year old son the other day from school normally acompanyed by his ds 3 when she was,nt with us he asked were ds was i said she was asleep on the sofa she ok she asleep he was disgusted with me
until i gave in and told him daddy came home from work early so he had her lol

sunnydelight · 10/11/2008 03:45

It's not actualy against the law, there is no definitive legal age when kids can be left alone, only guidelines, but parents can be prosecuted if anything goes wrong. There is no way I would leave kids of that age home alone though.

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