To think that being a single SAHM on benefits is not a 'lifestyle choice' but .........

[Littleredshoe]

basically scrounging ?

Surely being lucky enough to SAH with your children comes IF you can afford it? Either because you work part time, or have a partner who provides for you to do this.....

To just 'decide' that you 'prefer' not to work and live off benefits (when you are fit to work) is ridiculous and it makes me bl**dy angry that I pay tax to enable others to sit on their arses......

maybe I am ? But ......I bet there would be a lot less feckless teenage mothers if the 'right' to benefits and SAH was withdrawn.....

Sorry, can't find the mental energy to read all 8 pages.

But in response to the OP: If I work for most of my life (say for 15 years before I have children, and then again when they are at nursery/school) why is it wrong for me to claim benefits to stay at home when they are small, should I find myself a single parent? Isn't that why I pay taxes the rest of the time?

(The above is hypothetical by the way as dh supports the family but I really don't see that this is wrong, what am I missing?)

You want to take ahrd look at your own morals. I am angry at the responses on this thread, how dare any of you scroungers think you have a RIGHT to be a SAHM. the sooner the gov stops it the better.

spandex

If you could spell, i would try and read what you have said.

ANgels - what are you hoping to achieve? Not everyone is going to agree with you, so leave it...

sometimes life throws things at us that change everything.

I was a very successful industrial chemist, but life changed and now I struggle to find suitable work...

that doesn't make me a bad person.
As the saying goes.... There, for the grace of god, go I.

Take a leaf out of your book?? Clarify.

I thought you said you didn't have a job yourself? So what leaf should I take?

I don't know if you read my posts, but I have two children, one with special needs and I can't afford the childcare for two.

I would never earn a lot of money. When the children are in school I could make some money, but if I work now, I'd be operating at a loss.

You are a very strange woman. You can not possibly be happy with your life to come on here and be so, so nasty to people who are having things hard.

And 'a cushy number'? My bank won't even give me an overdraft because I'm on benefits. I had great difficulty even OPENING a bank account because I was on benefits (and had just moved to the country). I have had to take things off the conveyer belt because I can't even go one cent overdrawn..

I don't know why you are so intent to upset people for FUN.

I am troll because i disagree with you SAHM on benefits who obviously realise you are WRONG.

No JOB but a HUSBAND. If I was single I WOULD get a JOB. Liffey, you hav eturned on me because I disagreed with you.

Ok Angels, I'll tell the gov I don't want their money and I'll take my children to the nearest bridge and we'll live inside an old tv box and beg. OK???

Happy now?

here we go again, we should all feel sorry for single mothers on benefits.

I do know what I'm talking about - as I said, XP worked for minimum wage for a time, and we survived, and paid the rent and bills, and were OK. But that was because I looked after DD, and a single parent does not have access to the 'free' childcare that having a partner means.

I'm not trying to say people should rent crappy accomodation rather than buy a house of their own. But to be able to do so is a luxury really, that many people cannot have, even if they do work very hard - and so if you can afford to do it, you are better off than many. Someone on minimum wage (11k a year ish iirc), with very little job security, is not going to be able to buy a house ever.

I think that if you work, you deserve better than just to 'survive' though. I agree it seems very unfair that some people who work are no better off than those on benefits - but thats not because benefits are generous. The minimum wage needs to be higher to make it more viable for people (esp. single parents) to work and actually see some real improvements in what they can provide for their family.

"why is it wrong for me to claim benefits to stay at home when they are small, should I find myself a single parent? Isn't that why I pay taxes the rest of the time?"

Well this is the OP's point isn't it. Some people (yourself included) think that it is okay just to stop working, to get off the treadmill because the safety net is there. The OP's point is that the benefits safety net is just that, a safety net, and should not be used other than in desperation.

Which I kind of agree with actually. If people need to be supported throughout their lives with free healthcare, through their childhoods with free education, and through their dotage with financial support, then it all costs thousands upon thousands in tax. If you voluntarily take a few years off the treadmill, you are in effect taking more than your fair share.

ANgels, not 'turning on you', I am astonished by your nastiness and your stupidity. I have already said several times that I can't earn enough to run a household and pay childcare. What part of that is beyond your comprehension????

i'm off as well. I will not feed this troll any more.

funny isn't it how the OP has posted on the same threads as angles.

walk a mile, and get off your bloody high horse.

you've upset a lot of people here tonight, angels, and you know it.

angles. LOL

Spandex

Walk a mile in my shoes etc etc

Oh lololol

Angels, lets hope your husband doesn't decide to take up with some dirty sexy single mum from down the road and leave you up shit creek then, eh?

I don't want or need your pIty Angels. But if you were a more intelligent person you would be able to understand the difficulties faced by single mothers.

I'm guessing you are pretty fucking miserable about SOMETHING though.

I'm going to give up now. I'll save my breath to cool my porridge and let you have the last nasty no doubt word.

Why would anybody be upset about a different POV? Unless of course they know the way they are living is wrong. Being a SAH by choice is a luxury that someone on benefits is not entitled to.
BYE.

I am many things beansmum but definitely NOT stupid.

many be I am a bit cynical, but I am honestly and genuinely trying to discover if people really think this is ok?

Illegallybrunette has basically validated my opinion actually. She is now working rather than relying on benefits.......

no you are providing the state with teh next generation of citizen who will pay for your generations pensions/healthcare etc.

Its apoliticalpoint of view and not everyone is going to agree.

Personally I would like to see the right for a parent to be funded to stay at home with their child until they are schoolaged. I don;tthink it shoudl be generously funded and perhapsitshouldalso bemeanstested butI still beleive that it is right. I also believe it isright for the state to provide free abortions and free fertility treatemen to an appropriate level. depsite the fact that the state has paid for neither for me.

I personally don't believe a witch-hunt against one rather small section of society is going to cure any benefit culture which as a country we have developed. I have many more problmes with unemployed lazy arsed middle-aged beer drinking men being given my (single parent) hard earned tax than most single sahm.

haven't read thread but oh god, why do the single mums always get it in the neck. being a mum is a bloody hard job whether you split your time between an office and home, or whether you're at home with the kids most of the time.

There are a lot of genuinely greedy, bad people currently running off with our taxes and refusing to give anything back. Most of these people work in the top echelons of the banking and finance industry. Please can you have a pop at them instead?

I'll agree that greed and me-me-me is endemic. It's all a question of scale though. The idea that there are a lot of corporate fatcats who are somehow "running off with our taxes" is ill-informed though.

The vast majority of highly paid individuals are paying massive amounts of tax. Mainly to fund the sahps on benefits the prisons, the need to prop up financial institutions, wars in Iraq, that kind of stuff.