to be utterly pissed off at the apathy of strangers?

[theressomethingaboutmarie]

Bear with me!

I was walking through Guildford on Friday with my DD (13 months in her pushchair). I'd just left a shop in a precinct and was walking along. I heard a woman screaming at her son to "get in the fcking pushchair now, you fcking b*stard". The boy in question was about three or four and quietly walking along. His "mother" (for I use that term lightly) was ramming the pushchair into the back of his legs. Her partner was walking along with a baby in a pram.

I was shocked to hear and see this and so turned around in horror. She clocked me instantly and started screaming at me "what the f&ck are you looking at. Mind your own your own f*cking business". Her little boy looked close to tears (and why wouldn't he). I said, "you are abusing that poor lad" (for, she was!). She then shouted that she would "f&cking well start on yours next". I had been walking off but turned around to say, "oh I don't think so". She started to race after me shouting and screaming at me as I walked off. Finally giving up when I dived into a shop.

Would you like to know what the good people of Guildford did whilst she was a) very loudly and evidently abusing that little boy and b) threatening to hit a 13 month old? They did NOTHING. Absolutely NOTHING.

I've contacted the shopping centre security team to get the footage over to the Social Services so feel that I am doing what I can. I'm still absolutely bloody livid that no one did a damn thing.

People are tossers but thats the way the country is now so many people scared of getting hurt helping a stranger. Look at that guy that was helping a homeless man who was getting beaten up he got stabbed to death.

I hope they find the bitch and SS sort out her son poor little thing.

these days people are afraid they will get a knife pulled on them

YANBU, but tbh I would also have done nothing for the very reason that you describe - fear of being attacked by a mad woman.

TBH I would help someone in trouble but people are just chicken.

I see some programme where they put a little girl in a shopping centre to see how many people would stop and help her she was crying and had lost her Mummy I think only a handful of people stopped.

Nickytwotimes but don't you feel that by doing nothing, we're saying that it's okay to treat your kids like that. If no one intervenes, it's society giving you a great big tick to go ahead and treat them like dirt.

My concern is if that is how that poor lad is treated in public, what must be the daily horror he faces in private?

people are afraid
i remember the van driver who saw the toddler walking down the road alone and he was afraid to stop incase he was accused of abducting her
then toddler was found drowned in a pond - she had walked out of nursery without anyone noticing
that poor man must be beside himself with "what if"

I agree. I witnessed a similar event but all I could do was stare in revulsion and shock. You SO did the right thing.

DD lurched out of her buggy and smashed her head on the floor in Mothercare last week. NOT A SOUL asked if she was Ok or offered help and someone jumped into my space in the queue as I tended to her.

and at all these things

How awful, poor little boy. Good for you for confronting her! I'd like to think I would, but who knows, in reality I might not be so brave! But absolutely agree with you, the more society ignores such anti-social/appalling/absuive behaviour, the more it is seemingly condoned.

Not the same situation, but we recently had a phase where some vile young yobs went up the road in the early hours, obviously pissed, kicking in the wing mirror of every car. The first time I heard it DP was away and I was too scared to do anything. Next time, a few weeks later, DP was there and went ballistic at them (and he can shout really loudly!). Anyway, we were a bit freaked for a few weeks wondering whether they'd smash our windows or something but they haven't been back. Hopefully done the trick. Bet the whole street had heard them though, they were so loud, and no-one else said anything.

CrushWithEyeliner are you being serious that is fucking awful GRRRR people are so self absord and selfish.

Crushwitheyeliner. Hope you DD was ok.

i was on the bus the other day and a woman had a 3 yr old in a buggy
3 yr old asked her mummy if she could get out of the buggy, sit on mums knee and look out of the window
mum said "no you fucking cant"
3 yr old started to cry

SOrry CrushWithEyeliner is your DD ok.

I don't get why people swear at kids its awful espeically in public people have no shame.

these days it takes a strong person to speak out so good for you because you were probably the only adult that spoke up for that child that day. which is actually very sad indeed

I wouldn't be worried about getting stabbed in the OP's situation, but I wouldn't have a clue what to do that would actually make a difference/help, so wouldn't get involved on that basis.

wow thanks guys. I am getting more response here that from people that actually saw her cut her head! I wish you all lived near me LOL xxx

LOL CrushWithEyeliner. So is your DD ok?

and she was v upset but is ok now...x

"you were probably the only adult that spoke up for that child that day. which is actually very sad indeed"

I agree snig. And when you think about the implications of that for the wider society it is quite frightening really. These children only have abusive parents as role models and so what does the future hold for them.

Crush - can't believe that. If I had been there I would have helped you and shouted at the rude people who had queue jumped. But then that kind of thing makes my blood boil.

naily, that kind of thing makes me feel so

It was rotten, the assistant actually raised her eyes whilst DD was screaming. It did leave me wondering about peoples basic humanity.....

But I feel so much for children like in the OP as they have no empathy or compassion given to them from their own Mothers/ family.

It is a shame that nobody else got involved especially when she started shouting at you.

About children getting lost and nobody helping - my dd (4 yo) was "lost" for less than a minute in BHS in Braehead, Glasgow on Saturday and when I found her she already had 3 lovely ladies looking for me - if one of them was you then "thank you for stopping".

If I were a man I would never intervene - more likely to be accused of being a paedophile or attacked.

YANBU. She sounds like a nightmare 'mother'. I would be livid too.

I was on the bus a couple of months ago and a woman got on holding a baby (i would say approx. 10 mnths old). The baby was playfuly pulling at her mothers hair and laughing. The mother shouted in a loud voice 'stop that now or I'll give you a slap!'

Jesus, who would slap a 10 month old baby?! I was too shocked to say anything but wish I had now. Probably would have just got a torrent of abuse.