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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have my son airbrushed?

71 replies

missjennipenni · 08/10/2008 11:14

Ive mentioned before on here about my sons birthmark (pic on my profile), I love it as its part of him, its just other peoples commenst that irk me.

Anyway, we recently had some professional photos taken of him, now that he has reached 6 months. We went for the viewing, an dthey were adorable (of course!) but his brithmark was quite promininet because he was lying on his tummy & lifting up his head (straining causes it to be brighter)

The photographer asked us if we would like it air-brushed out of the final photo. Caught off guard, I said yes, thinking it would be nice to have a photo where his birthmark isnt the first thing you notice.

Now Ive had time to think about it though, I feel terrible! What if it upsets him when he is older, that i wanted it airbrushed out? Or will other people think I am being vain by doing it?

The mark itself will probably disappear in the next year or so, and we have hundreds of photos where you can see it. DP thought it would be nice to have one without it.

What would you have done? Am i a mean mummy for airbrushing his imperfection?

OP posts:
Wuxiapian · 08/10/2008 16:38

How sad that other peoples' comments would make you decided to airbrush your beautiful child.

And, how incredibly rude for the photographer to even suggest it.

How will your son feel when he's older that mum and dad felt his birthmark was that hideous that they airbrushed it out?!

YABExtremelyU.

MascaraOHara · 08/10/2008 16:41

oh Worzel.. my dd can have any saggy skin removed when she's older too (6 now, consultant says 9yo) did yours have laser for the colour.. I'm assuming you also had neavis' (?)

MerkinFitter · 08/10/2008 16:51

wuxiapian - I dont think his birthmark is hideous! I havent once said anything even remotely like it!

missjennipenni · 08/10/2008 16:54

Worzsel - hope it all goes well for your DD, im sure she will only look different for a wee while, until you get used to it again! It will probably just be like a drastic haircut, i felt a bit bereft when DD1 had her long beautiful hair cut off to a short bob!

OP posts:
littlelapin · 08/10/2008 16:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Wuxiapian · 08/10/2008 17:06

Merkin, by airbrushing it out of the picture, what does that say?

LyraSeveredtongue · 08/10/2008 17:07

I had some professional photos taken of my two DSs. The studio airbrushed out DS1's chicken pox scars without me asking but I was quite pleased because he looks like he's got the perfect skin he deserves at his age (he was 5). I doubt he'll notice in years to come that his scars are missing from the picture.

WorzselMummage · 08/10/2008 17:14

She'll be 4 when its done and her consultant said they wouldn't do the lazer surgery on it they would just cut out the majority of it and stitch it back up, i think most of the supplying blood vessels have died off but she did they they will take as little as possible and they maybe have to go back when she's 9 or 10 to finish it off. She said it's better to take to little than to much.

We're quite lucky that her lip line hasnt been compromised atall, the swelling comes underneath and pushes it out, she'll probably not have a scar, well not one that we can see anyway.

I would have happily left the one of her wrist but the cons said it'll never go and they may aswell do them both together.

scary stuff and horribly big decisions ( which of course i have been left to make )

Where is your DD's Mascara ?

WorzselMummage · 08/10/2008 17:16

Sorry, on her forehead i have just checked back

Was your DD premature ?

bubblagirl · 08/10/2008 17:36

i was born with huge red birth mark by my eye it was massive and bright red now its gone it looks like a scar my mum told eveyone it was my beauty spot and all the children wanted one lol

embrace it its who he is and is gorgeous mine was red and awful right beside my eye but nothing now just looks like a scar

i dont think your being unreasonable i dont think you should have been asked your ds is gorgeous as he is and my mum took no notice of others just said it was my beauty spot and that is your ds's

NannyNanny · 08/10/2008 20:04

sorry to have come across harshly. I just don't think that changing your sons appearance is a good thing.

SaffySpook · 08/10/2008 20:19

I have been sitting reading this when I suddenly remembered ds1 had this on his forehead when he was young. He is now nearly 15 and I had completely forgotten. Like your son it appeared worse if he was pale or cold. Some photos you can see it, some you can't. It was a big deal to me all those years ago but now I had truly forgot about it so I would have to say I don't think it matters if you do or don't airbrush it out.

OLIVIASMAMA · 08/10/2008 20:32

Oh he's delightful - don't airbrush, definately definately not.

My DD had a similar thing when she was born, it's gone now, she's one.

TwoPumpkins · 09/10/2008 11:56

Just have it made a bit lighter, as if he wasnt straining.

pamelat · 09/10/2008 13:32

I wouldn't airbrush.

In fact I dont think that ANY photos should be air brushed, isn't it kind of like lying?

The photographer was rude to ask you.

thisisyesterday · 09/10/2008 13:36

no, I wouldn't do it. it'll look really weird when all the other pictures of him have it in.

and when people see it and say "what happened to his birthmark?" what will you say>

oh, we think he looks nicer without it?????? seriously?>>>

Tclanger · 10/10/2008 23:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsMattie · 10/10/2008 23:25

can you change your mind? It's part of him. Don't airbrush it out.

Sycamoretree · 10/10/2008 23:41

Ah, don't airbrush, he's lovely. You were caught off guard, it's understandable. Call them back and say just leave him as he is.

But now I've looked at your pics you have made me asked about the little vest he's wearing. I don't get it? ! (Am I being thick?!)

Sycamoretree · 10/10/2008 23:47

Oh, oh, I think I've got it. Do you guys LOVE lost as much as me and DH?

Or am I very much on the wrong track?

exasperatedmummy · 11/10/2008 00:14

My DD has one of these marks, she is 3, and now im looking through my pictures on here to try and find it in one of them, i can't - that makes me a bit sad. It was very prominent when she was born - but you know what - i didn't notice until DP said, why is her face all red? lol - i just said, oh, thats a birth mark, thought no more of it. I call it her lizard mark as it is very reptilian i think I love it, it is very much part of her - cept i think it might be gone mostly now .

If someone had suggested airbrushing that out, my response would have been - You can do what you like, and keep the photos - oh, and you'll not be getting a penny of my money! Fucking cheeky bastard, i think i would have lamped him one.

My DDs mark was far more prominent than the OPs, im just trying to find a photo to stick on my profile. The point being, this mark wont last - why would you want to not have record of it.

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