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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To really really hate the school run

62 replies

staranise · 25/09/2008 19:14

Excuse moan but...

DD1 has started school - she's settling in well and I hate it. Feels like I'm now trapped in a daily horrid commute that mainly consists of cajoling two (4 year old and 2 year old) tired grumpy hungry children across busy roads, on and off buses, carrying bags of stuff, standing around in cold playgorounds etc etc. Took me nearly 2 hours (!!)to collect DD and get home again and we're only about than a mile from the school. Can't believe I've got years and years of this ahead of me.

I know I'm BU, but am just hating it. can I blame being heavily pg for grumpiness?

OP posts:

CarGirl · 25/09/2008 19:40

Have you got a swivel wheel 3 wheeler, they are great to lean on. I found it easier to walk leaning on a pushchair when I was pregnant with SPD than walking unaided IYSWIM.

giraffescantdancethetango · 25/09/2008 19:41

aaaah sciatica sympathy sympathy sympathy. poor you. I have this badly and I take really strong pain killers, even then when I move buggy it will shoot pain, do you take anything for it?

Original poster

staranise · 25/09/2008 19:41

Friday

And the week has gone v quickly

definitely think sharing will be the answer. They've only been full-day for a week but once they've settled in, will suggest some shares

just all I seem to do is moan these days anyway. and now I've got something new to moan about My poor DH, he is a saint listening to me every evening

OP posts:

giraffescantdancethetango · 25/09/2008 19:42

agree with cargirl re 3wheeler, find they glide so much more and require much less effort...i guess for bus thats much harder though.

CarGirl · 25/09/2008 19:43

Have you tried an osteopath????? I saw one for my SPD whilst pregnant (and sciatica when not pregnant) it made a huge difference, I was able to throw away the crutches after a few sesssions.

noonki · 25/09/2008 19:46

Reflexologist gets rid of my sciatic everytime it rears it's ugly head.

poor you

Original poster

staranise · 25/09/2008 19:47

We have a P&T but it's on its last legs - maybe I shoudl dig it out again as it probably would be better than the maclaren. also suspect that I would be less stressed if using the buses less and could walk a quieter route home, albeit longer.

Thanks for tea, cake & sympathy, school has jsut been a bit of a rude shock for me, feel institutionalised alreay, though at least DD seems to like it

OP posts:

countingto10 · 25/09/2008 19:48

YUNBA, can't stand the school run. Where I live the schools are seperated into first, middle and secondary. The first and middle schools are approx. 1 mile apart. DS2 started middle school this Sept. DS3 in yr 1 in first school and DS4 in nursery on first school site. DS3 is ASD and hates school so getting there is also a problem. DS1 also ASD and weekly boarding at special school.

The mornings are not too bad DH takes DS2 and I walk with DS3 and DS4. However the afternoon is impossible. DS2 and DS4 both finish at 3.00pm a mile apart. Nursery agreed to hold onto DS4 whilst I collected DS2 provided I was not more than 10 minutes late otherwise they would charge £25 extra a week ! Last week I had a meltdown, DS2 was late out and when I finally arrived at first school there was no parking places (obviously because all us mums are driving like mad women to get between schools) and when I got to nursery DS4 was in tears as he didn't like being last all the time.

Anyway my mother has agreed to pick up DS2 whilst DS4 is still at nursery and I pick up DS2 after collecting the others - I just couldn't cope with the stress.

Don't know what I am going to do when DS2 starts secondary as I will have 1 at first, 1 at middle and 1 at secondary at different ends of town !

yomellamoHelly · 25/09/2008 19:49

My ds1 has just started too. The school is 2.5km away. I have a decent pushchair (for ds2) and a decent scooter (the microlite) for ds1 which is a godsend. It takes us about 25 minutes. Less if we manage to bump into a schoolmate.
He gets a snack and a quick play in the playground before coming back.
Last couple of days I've shared the run home which has been fab for me (favour to be returned next week). Any chance you can do a bit of networking?

Original poster

staranise · 25/09/2008 19:54

Gosh countingto10, you poor thing, it sounds like hell. I knew I was moaning over nothing!

Yes, am seeing osteopath and she helps enormously but pushing buggy jsut really seems to trigger it plus I have problems with ankles blah blah blah...

I bore myself with my moaning

OP posts:

countingto10 · 25/09/2008 20:06

It will be easier when you're not pregnant.

I'm a bit naughty with my youngest two, DS4 who is nearly 4 is stuffed into a buggy and DS3 who is nearly 6 still likes to use the buggy board and TBH it is quicker when I running late (which is nearly always).

BTW, don't apologize for moaning - you should hear me (especially about the school run and who decided to split the schools!).

WilfSell · 25/09/2008 20:09

organise a walking bus? they are great.

nooka · 25/09/2008 20:59

countingtoten at what point could your ds2 start making his own way home from school? Are there ways he could build up to this? I was coming home from juniors on the bus with a good walk too from the age of 10 or so. It may be your son is a way off that, but most children should be able to get home from secondary. Possibly not if there are special needs involved, indeed my dd would get to and from school just fine, but I'm not so sure about her older brother yet, so I know it's not always that straightforward.

junkcollector · 26/09/2008 00:22

Up hill, down hill, up hill, down hill, up frigging hill down aforementioned frigging hill...yes YANBU. I hate it too

nappyaddict · 26/09/2008 01:48

a bike for the elder one might make it a bit quicker?

countingto10 · 26/09/2008 12:54

Nooka, he is 8 and not a confident 8 yr old. My mum is encouraging him to meet outside the school and building it up to walking to her house which is round the corner. Unfortunately we live over a mile and a half away which is quite a walk with numerous roads to cross including a major A road with no school crossing patrols on it.

We lost the school crossing patrol outside the first school two years ago and they have never been replaced (the council have now reduced the speed to 20 miles an hour outside the school following some near misses!).

Talking to other parents, they tend to let their children start to walk home alone in Y5 depending on the child. I will probably encourage him to meet me at the first school (like some mums do) thus avoiding crossing the main road.

It's not fear of abduction that prevents us letting them walk home alone it's fear of them getting squashed by a car. My DS2 is in a world of his own most of the time and even when he is walking with me I have to watch what he is doing.

It won't be so bad next September as DS4 will be starting school and I won't to pick him and DS3 up until 3.15 which will give me 15 mins to get between schools.

Original poster

staranise · 26/09/2008 15:18

Be careful what you wish for...

sciatica is now acute and am bedbound and unable to do schoolrun...Dh has had to leave work early to collect DD1. Serves me right for wishing schoolrun would disappear...

OP posts:

mrsruffallo · 26/09/2008 15:21

Can't you walk a mile?
Much more enjoyable than buses

Original poster

staranise · 26/09/2008 15:24

I can but DD2 (aged 2) would struggle, even on a scooter and buggy difficult at the moment because of aforementioend sciatica. Am sure it will improve and/or we will have to invest in some fancy lightweight 3-wheeler

OP posts:

bloomingfedup · 26/09/2008 15:35

I used to hate it but have got used to it now - am into my 3rd year. Prehaps it will get better for you to?

rebelmum1 · 26/09/2008 15:37

Your going to have to walk, if it takes two hours on the bus.. when they are older they can get themselves there, I take it there isn't a school bus.. you could get a job close to the school save you traipsing back

rebelmum1 · 26/09/2008 15:40

or have you thought about moving next to the school

elkiedee · 26/09/2008 15:56

staranise, sorry about sciatica. Maybe you should invest in a new Phil and Ted (or try and get a secondhand one in better condition) now rather than waiting. If you have a 2 year old and you're about to have another one, you'll need it for 2 yr old and baby, and if you think it would make walking easier when you're better...

How long do you have to go?

VictorianSqualor · 26/09/2008 16:03

Get DD2 a little bike with a handle so she can ride/you can push.

FWIW, I used to have a nightmare school run.

Bus to town, bus from town to school, bus back to town then bus back to the village we lived in. All with a 3yr old and heavily pg.

I moved next to the school in the holidays I'm now a one minute walk away.

Quattrocento · 26/09/2008 16:09

You need to get military about this. Set firm hard rules about morning routines to help with the battling. Stuff like they need to get dressed by xtime, no TV until dressed, brushed, fed, teeth cleaned etc. Pack bags the night before.

Now this commute thingy sounds nightmareish. Walking must be a better option. Also could you find someone to share the school run with?

By the way, it does not get any better ever. You just get used to it.

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