..to call the school I'm hoping ds1 will go to and tell them about the appalling behaviour of their senior pupils at the supermarket yesterday?

[Aero]

This is our local grammar school and some of the sixth formers were at the supermarket at the same time as me around lunchtime. In the car park, a woman driver had obviously annoyed the driver of a carful of lads (I didn't see what she did to irritate him) and the torrent of abuse she received from him afterwards was nothing ordinary, followed by several rude hand gestures and further ranting. This was in front of parents with young children, myself (gladly ds2 was at school), and other shoppers. The Head Prefect was there, and although not directly involved, was telling his mates about it, laughing about it and certainly will know who was driving.

Now this school is top of our list (on our doorstep) if ds manages to get in and tbh, I was not impressed to see senior boys out in uniform conducting themselves like this and if it were my ds1 (in several years time), I would be very annoyed and would want to know so I could discuss it with him in the hope that such a thing wouldn't occur again.

WWYD - would you call or am I over-reacting?

I'd call. Kids in uniform need to realise they are representing the school and they are children and not adults. Anyway, remember the hoohas about people being sacked for forwarding salacious emails/appearing on dodgy websites etc?

Funnily enough, I saw a group of teenage girls in unform playing up on my way to work and thought 'ooh,bet their head would have somethign to say about that .

It was dinned into us at school that when in uniform and out in the town we werew expected to behave decently. And the head boy as well

I'd be reporting it even if I wanted to send my son to a different school.

I'd be happy for my son to be "dobbed in" in this manner too as I don't want him learning that you can get away with this sort of aggressive behaviour and continuing with it.

To be extreme and Daily Mail about it, an aggressively uttered abusive outburst can do serious lasting damage to someone of the older generation with multiple health problems. Would you want your elderly grandparent to be on the receiving end of that sort of behaviour from their local teenagers in uniform.

Make that call and don't be afraid about it affecting your child's application to the school when older. Any decent headteacher would jump at the chance to admit pupils of socially responsible parents.

You can preface the discussion with admitting you didn't see what provoked the outburst or you can just say what you saw rather than detailing what you didn't see.

agree that reporting this kind of behavious is part of living in a community. You don't want kid getting away with this stuff, but sadly many if not most people would feel unsafe confronting a group of teens in the street (and fair enough, most of em round here are armed)

God, when I was at school (vv posh girls') you weren't even allowed to eat outside school in school uniform. The thing is, it was outside school but during school hours so it is the school's business.

Going into town in the sixth form is still a big deal at lots of schools and I should think that revoking that privilege for the miscreants would actually be quite a good punishment.

I would report the incident too aero

Dandelioness

Well, I don't call laughing about it with his mates a mature, socially responsible attitude, do you ?

I therefore deduce he is either the best of a very bad bunch, hence the only option for Head Prefect or he has other attributes that made the school sanction his appointment as ambassador for the school.

If he was identifiable in public as a prefect, and head prefect at that, he needed to consider the impact of his actions in public more carefully.

report them

if my DD's were seen while in school uniform behaving like this I would want to know....for my sake as much as the schools.

added to that fact is that these boys are clearly trusted enough to go off school premises during school hours, and yet are too immature to stay responsible.

At no point does anyone deserve to be attcked verbally regardless of their own behaviour, so it does not matter if no-one saw what the lady did/didn;t do., these boys should not have behaved in that manner.

It is the responsibility of all of us to raise children to respect society. It takes a village to raise a child don;t forget.......

A MN-er reported a silly assault (throwing hair gel at passers by!) by girls from our local secondary...and the school went into full Miss Marple in their efforts to identify the offender - invited the MN-er in for two meetings, complete with year photos in an identity parade!

As this is the most likely secondary for DS, I was most impressed by the school's response.

Sitdown, personally I think you are being presumptious to judge someone on a small snippet of their behaviour. I am very aware that the OP didn't see the whole situation. She doesn't know what the woman did. I doubt that the boys were justified in verbally abusing her, but she could have dones something to endanger their lives. If the boys were out on school time, then the school should be phoned, but I do feel the OP's reasons for wanting to call aren't wholly public-spirited.

Well I did just that after been told to F off by a group of kids in their school uniform. I got the reply of "what do you want us to do about it?" from the school.

I was so angry as I know for a fact that in private schools they would have taken it very seriously.

Why is it worse to be on the receiving end of abuse if the person abusing you is wearing school uniform? Is it because it is humiliating because they are younger than you and therefore you should be the one abusing them perhaps? I really don't get that. I have no problem with Aero ringing up the school, although it's a bit sad if the only reason she is bothered about it is if her son one day goes to that school.

I think you should tell the school. Who cares if it is 'none of your business' as some posters have suggested!

It will be an opportunity for the Head Teacher to discuss acceptable behaviour and appropriate standards with his pupils. What is wrong with highlighting antisocial behaviour and forcing those concerned to reflect upon it?

This is why we have a society of foul mouthed, abusive, inconsiderate loosers (lol, I find myself coming out with that sort of statement more and more often now that I am 40)

We will have to agree to disagree dandelioness.

Everyone is judged on snippets of their behaviour as they wend their way through life. These teenagers in the learning phase of their life haven't grapsed that fact yet and I think this could be a suitable wake up call for them.

poshtottie, plenty of state schools do take that sort of report from members of the public seriously, I promise

Yes, I think you were rather unlucky with your experience PoshT

I went to a state school and we were reprimanded for wearing 'intimidating boots' when out and about in the town. Not in uniform either (6th form)

Report them. Why not?

"wearing of scary velour panama hats and inappropriate conversation with lad in newsagent on corner"
Effie, you do now have to describe the boots in more detail...

Agree, please report them. Our (primary) school takes teh "ambassadors for our school when in uniform" approach too and the kids (well, the good ones ) take it v. seriously. It's very important for kids to understand that anti-social behaviour is not to be tolerated.

Even the parents at our school are expected to behave appropriately. For instance, if the mad woman who lives down the School's road, gets uppity with us for parking along there - perfectly legally I might add,(she generally rants and swears) we are required to maintain a dignified silence and simply report it to the School Office

they were described by well-meaning member of the public as 'Nazi jack boots'

small town
1990s
prob don't need to elucidate

DH has all sorts of great inappropriate-behaviour-in-uniform stories. Patrick Leigh Fermor was expelled becasue he was seen holding hands with the greengrocers daughter. An old boy of DH's school was expelled for being seen with the high school girls - when the master hoved into view they kindly sat on him to hide the evidence but a uniformed limb protruded...

Yes! Get 'em bollocked.

Tell the school. They should and would want to know. If you got the reg plate, even better as our 6th formers have to have their registration plates on file to park at school.

I split up a fight between two teenage boys recently (with half of the school watching on and me with DS in pushchair ) and reported it to the school. They were helpful and grateful to be informed. One of the boys needed medical attention and had refused it from me and I felt an obligation.

Added to this, the whole incident was watched by a teacher from the local Primary School who did nothing to stop the fight or break-up the mob surrounding them. I think that you have every right to call the school (which is undoubtably safer than intervening as I did but I am a SAHM who was a Secondary teacher so was on autopilot). Having worked schools the Management team would prefer to know than not know IMO.