Would I be unreasonable to get married on my mums anniversary?

[missjennipenni]

I want to get married on 09/09/09 next year, but this happens to be my mum & her husbands 10th wedding anniversary (and also her husbands birthday lol).

Is it a bit unreasonable to "nick" this date from them?

Yes. There are 364 other days to choose from.

But I want that date! [petulant] lol

You could ask them what they think about it...

I don't see why it would be unreasonable. We got married on my mum and dad's 25th wedding anniversary. Though, possibly it was a bit different for us, as that date seems to have become the family wedding day- it was also my nan and grandad and aunt and uncle's anniversary. Maybe it will become tradition in your family too! If nothing else, it does make anniversary dates a lot easier to remember...

Nah - it will just mean they never forget either their own anniversary or yours! I would float it with your mum first, but I don't see anything wrong with it

i think it is lovely to share dates with family members - I was born on my grandma's birthday and one of her daughter's got married that day (when I was 6).
The only think I would say (and sorry to throw a dampner on things) is to think about how you will feel about the date once your mum is no longer alive. Wedding anniversaries are different to birthdays - but I HATED it being my birthday for about 10 years after my grandma died.

I wanted to get a rough estimate of a likely reaction before asking

If i got a resounding YABU, I would just pick another day.

Check with Mum and SF first, but it seems like a good idea.
Wouldn't bother me if someone in my family wanted to get married on the same day as we did.

Ana - didnt think of that, I could start a family tradition here!

Why do you want that date?

And what would happen if e.g. the venue you want is already booked up for that date?

You know your mum best, would she look on this as a nice thing to do, or stealing her thunder?

If it were me, and the date fitted in with everyone´s plans (siblings in 3 different continents to take into account), I´d go for it.

just do it on 10/10/10 instead

if I was your mum I would take it as a compliment, surely?

No why shouldn't you? Unless your Mum has copyrighted it then, YABU.

what is the issue?

it is done for an nice reason

as it happened we got married on DH's grandma's birthday

my DSis got married on our birthday (we are twins)

Cies - I just like the unusual date, things like that tickle me (yes im sad!)

DrHorrible - thats our back up plan, if we cant afford next year

ChasingS - I think sharing wedding ann with my mum, even after she has gone, would actually make me feel close to her, IYSWIM?

coco & ruby - I just dont want to step on any toes, I wasnt sure if it was bad etiquitte!

yes I do, I just threw it in as something you are unlikely to have considered - knowing how I felt.

I would have thought your Mum and her husband would be touched if you were married on the same day as them, my mum would be. Check with them first but surely they would not have a problem with it. An anniversary is only really personal to the couple, it is not like other people make a fuss about the date.

I hadnt considered that at all, so thanks

I think it's nice but you must talk to them before confirming.

Ask your mum and her husband how the feel about it - she probably won't mind, or will be pleased about it.

Ok, I feel fine about asking them now, I just didnt want to cause a row if it was a etiquitte faux pas

Agree that they will probably be delighted. Run it by them first though! Great day as your DH probably wont forget the date

Me and DH hardly even remember our anniversary so I am not the best person to give advice, some people are really touchy about these things!

You have to book well in advance, as the 08/08/08 was really popular for weddings, our local church did 25 weddings that day, not all in church but spread between two priests.