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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have wanted to enjoy our first holiday with our baby

113 replies

pamelat · 11/09/2008 08:53

DD 8 months.

Just back from a week away, so glad to be home!

We shared an over priced hotel room with her.

First night she woke every 2 hours. Second night hourly. After that she decided that she would sleep from 7pm until about 2am (fine) but then that would be it .. !!

We took it in turns to get up with her at 230am and drive her around (!) so that the other one could get some sleep.

She was then grumpy every day because she was tired. We were fractious because we were tired.

We spent a fortune (which we don't have) because the weather was awful so we had to go to things.

Evenings we were often in bed by 9pm (with the TV on silent so as to not wake her).

I guess you learn, never again will I share a hotel room with her! Self catering is the only option.

I know (or think?) that some of you may be critical and say "well you were lucky enough to go on holiday, lucky enough to have a DD/DH etc" but I can't help but feel hard done to, was looking forward to it and frankly it was a disaster!!

OP posts:
Cies · 11/09/2008 08:59

Poor you.

Not much else to say really. You live and learn. Did you get to see any interesting places on your trips out and about? Or try any new food and drink?

onceinalifetime · 11/09/2008 09:03

Holidays will never be the same again. The sort of holiday you envisaged is the one you can only dream about until you can persuade grandparents or trusted friends to care for your dd and you get the chance to have a dd-free weekend (if you're lucky).

LaVieEnRose · 11/09/2008 09:04

know how you feel. we shared a room with ds earlier this year for 2 weeks and for the first week he just didn't settle. The cot provided was too small and he kept waking up.

self catering is definitely the way to go! i came back feeling like i needed another holiday!

Cappuccino · 11/09/2008 09:08

oh bless

you will laugh about it in years to come, honest

it was never going to go well, I'm sorry, with a baby in a hotel room

you live and learn

penona · 11/09/2008 09:11

Poor you. Our holiday with our DTs was awful too. We came back utterly exhausted and throughly pissed off, so I sympathise with you.

Hope the next one is better.

Original poster
pamelat · 11/09/2008 09:12

I can't believe how stupid we were!!

She sleeps well (ish) at home.

She was also in a forward facing car seat for the first time and she hated it and screamed every time we went anywhere unless i sang "Old MacDonald"!

We had one good day (Monday), the sun shone and we went wine tasing!

Our bags were lost on arrival (but turned up a couple of hours later!)

I thought that we would swim each morning, she would sleep at lunch whilst we had a nice meal and we would sight see in the afternoons, mmmmmmmm

OP posts:
throckenholt · 11/09/2008 09:12

I echo onceinalifetime - holidays are never the same once you have kids - and are rarely relaxing in my experience - still to be enjoyed despite that.

I must admit sharing a room with my kids is never a happy experience.

My tip - hire a cottage - you have space to do your own thing and at whatever time suits you - you can feed yourselves or eat out as you like and you aren't tied to set times.

It will get better

Cappuccino · 11/09/2008 09:15

oh the best laid plans

well there'll be no wine tasting next year with a toddler that's for sure

pushchair · 11/09/2008 09:20

Agree holidays never the same again. We came back this year from holiday cottage and DP and I felt as if it had just been the usual except in a different place -oh but without the home dvd's,toys,etc

francagoestohollywood · 11/09/2008 09:23

lol at cappuccino!

I agree hotels and babies (toddlers/children etc) don't go well together...

Pendulum · 11/09/2008 09:23

Poor you- I remember weeping bitterly over this in the first year of DD1's life. They are sent to fox us, you know. Nothing you ever plan will turn out the way you expect. They will be miserable throughout an expensive trip you have planned meticulously for them, then be filled with joy by the prospect of catching a bus into town to buy milk

I recently had to share a hotel room with both DDs at a family wedding and it was a total disaster. Would never do it out of choice - always self-catering from now on!

Jennyusedtobepink · 11/09/2008 09:24

You did better than us. Dh and I went to Centerparcs with dd when she was 4mo. We came home after one day.

This year's holiday was also stressful, but better once she acclimatised. We're getting a villa next year.

Chocolateteapot · 11/09/2008 09:27

Self catering for us in the Teapot household. This years holiday was actually extremely relaxing, it has taken until they are 9 and 4 to get there though !

Lots of sympathy, it does improve.

StellaDallas · 11/09/2008 09:30

There is light at the end of the tunnel - we just had our first holiday in ten years with no under fives - it was fantastic to holiday sans pushchairs, nappies, tired, grumpy toddlers and to sit enjoying a bottle of wine in the evening while they ran around playing with all the other children.
But I realise this is cold comfort at this stage

NotQuiteCockney · 11/09/2008 09:30

When I've used hotel rooms with one baby, I put the baby to sleep in the bathroom - either travel cot in the middle of the room, or just the mattress in the bath. You can sell it as an adventure, the bathroom is generally dark, and you only have to pee quietly, not watch TV quietly.

MrsMattie · 11/09/2008 09:33

Oh dear. Sorry it all went a bit pear shaped. Holidays are not quite the relaxing fun fest they were pre-baby, eh? It will get better, though

BalloonSlayer · 11/09/2008 09:33

I do so sympathise.

My DH can never understand why I am so unenthusiastic about our self-catering holidays with small DCs.

I have pointed out till I am blue in the face "how do you fancy your holiday this year being two weeks doing your usual job, with all the same pressures and the same deadlines BUT in a much smaller office, with no phone, no computer, no paper, in short lacking anything that you normally have to make your job any easier?"

He still doesn't get it.

piratecat · 11/09/2008 09:35

what a disappointment

sorry it went pear shaped.

Overmydeadbody · 11/09/2008 09:35

The best way to ensure you are never disappointed and feel let down is to make no plans and have no expectations of how the holiday will be.

Original poster
pamelat · 11/09/2008 09:40

I think that I may use one weeks holiday money and go away for one night to a hotel with a creche!!

OP posts:
Notyummy · 11/09/2008 09:41

OOOh I feel for you! Our first break with our 7 month old (who usually slept through 7 - 7 coincided with her cutting her first teeth, and developing a slight diary allergy...fun, fun, fun!

I can highly recommend THompson Al Fresco/Canvas Holidays/Eurocamp etc. Get yourself a nice mobile home somewhere warm, order in pizza, take a portable DVD player if you want to watch a film occasionally in the evening...and CHILL.

WE have just returned from a week in Italy...bliss!

Oh, apart from dd getting worms and screaming the mobile down for the first 2 nights:

'My itchy bottom, my itchy bottom. MUMMMEEEE'

Twas OK once we got hold of the wormkiller drugs though....

WideWebWitch · 11/09/2008 09:47

Holidays with v small babies and children are just same childcare in a different place!

WideWebWitch · 11/09/2008 09:48

It does get better when they're a bit older.

SoupDragon · 11/09/2008 09:48

Sadly, YABU. That's what holidays with children are like most of the time.

Oblomov · 11/09/2008 09:53

O.K. I have TOTAl sympathy with you. We went to Bath for a long weekend, for our first trip with ds. Total disaster.
However, I do disgree with many of the posters.
I do think you can holiday like you used to. Its just that it changes slightly. You have to get yuorself in a slightly different mindset. the requirememnts are slightly different. But I DO think it is possible to go on holiday with a toddler and encorporate .... a wine tasting session... or similar, life doesn't need to stop altogether.
AND hotel holidays can work. They have worked for us , many times going on a package, all inclusive. Worked a treat with ds. We too learnt our lesson and always make sure he is in a seperate room. Has never failed.

If you search on MN, there are lots of threads/advice on compromising to get the type of holiday, you ALL want.

Sorry you had a shit time. Beleive us, it happens to us all. But don't give up. You will get it right.