to have wanted to enjoy our first holiday with our baby

[pamelat]

DD 8 months.

Just back from a week away, so glad to be home!

We shared an over priced hotel room with her.

First night she woke every 2 hours. Second night hourly. After that she decided that she would sleep from 7pm until about 2am (fine) but then that would be it .. !!

We took it in turns to get up with her at 230am and drive her around (!) so that the other one could get some sleep.

She was then grumpy every day because she was tired. We were fractious because we were tired.

We spent a fortune (which we don't have) because the weather was awful so we had to go to things.

Evenings we were often in bed by 9pm (with the TV on silent so as to not wake her).

I guess you learn, never again will I share a hotel room with her! Self catering is the only option.

I know (or think?) that some of you may be critical and say "well you were lucky enough to go on holiday, lucky enough to have a DD/DH etc" but I can't help but feel hard done to, was looking forward to it and frankly it was a disaster!!

Elliot, 'fraid so.
Ds - I tell ya, that kid eats anything and sleeps for england. Lord knows where he gets those characteristics from

been away from the thread (actualy working on the blessed job search ).

Dunno if Doodle2U is still about but, if you are, thanks for the response. I'm sure it will be better than my fears so can't be all bad!

Trouble with the fussy eating is that I actually would not mind him eating crap for a week! He takes a VERY dim view of finger foods generally - took us ages to get him to accept textures! But you may be right about change of environment etc.

Might see if there's a MacDonalds nearby....

Anyway am armed with extra long travel cot and portable blackout blinds.

Will be taking wine.

Elffriend - am sure you will have a much better time for us. I think we suffered from a lack of planning and naive expectations! You'll be fine.

we took ds3 aged 8 months round iceland (the country not the shop) for 12 days in a 4x4 staying in a different place (b&b type)every night. (Also took ds1&3 )

He was fine, slept a lot, crawled everywhere and enjoyed the snow.

The only problem we have with him now he is older is a tendency to vomit in the car at random moments. We have just been to germany and switzerland and managed 2 nights while on the move in hotels.
When he won't settle to sleep in a hotel i tend to read a book in the bath and let dh get on with it!

Pamelat, yes maybe that was your only error. I think, subconsciuously, I had given ALOT of thought as to what kind of holiday dh, ds and I needed. What some of our essential requirements were.
And I knew that , for example on an all inclusive holiday where snacks were REALLY available 24/7, this would keep ds, who was very young at the time , and needed to be fed, when he needed to be fed, (but mainly dh, who also wants to eat, when he wants to eat) happy.
I think it is things like this make the REAL difference.

Holidays and small children are just bad. really. We lived for travelling and holidays before children, we thought we absolutely needed many months a year off work in exotic places, plus lots of weekends away.

as other have said, it's just childcare in a different setting (without all the child-friendly things you've got set up at home).

And now, with 3 small children, we hardly bother going away. it was perhaps the biggest disappointment of having children, how unrelaxing holidays are. There are many compensations in life for having children, but holidays aren't included there.

When work colleagues ask me if I had a "relaxing" break I want to hit them.

I don't think holidays with dcs are not bad just different. It does depend on what you're used to - if your idea of a holiday is:

• loads of sleep
• loads of sex
• loads quite a bit of alcohol
• reading books/magazines
• sunbathing
• lying down for at least 30 seconds
• enjoying romantic meals
• sightseeing
• peace
• relaxation
• making the most of the hotel facilities like bar, spa, bathroom even

then it is indeed a bit of a shock

not bad, I mean bad

Well we've always enjoyed holidays with our DCs but they were utterly unlike the holidays we had pre-DCs.

We only do hotels with the children for one or two nights - so only weekends away. The issue for us is that we were never prepared to leave them in a room and go out for dinner or whatever so not relaxing for us. Even the nicest hotel rooms get a bit claustrophobic.

We've always (with only one exception) self-catered for longer holidays and ensured that we eat out for at least one meal a day. Breakfast is always easy, so we would go out for lunch or dinner. We don't do kids clubs either, so it is a bit exhausting, and sometimes you do end up longing for them to go to bed, but they've always been fun.

We do occasionally have fun on our holidays. But I can't escape the fact that our everyday life at home is less tiring and more relaxing than our "holidays".

Other things that have helped us on holiday include:

• ear plugs
• co-sleeping
• only going for a week
• taking turns to get up and out with the kids to let partner have a lie in
• breaking the routine and taking kids out late - little ones sleeping in pushchair, older ones love it

I'm with fennel on this one.
Its the fact that its just bloody hard work and with less sleep than at home. The sleep thing is a biggie. Its just not much fun doing anything in a fuzz of sleep deprivation.

Oh, and did I mention I would like to sleep on my holiday

My prekids holidays weren't anything like onceinalifetimes list. Usually they involved self catering (but eating out a lot) and walking in beautiful places. In theory we should be able to do that with the kids. I suppose it is the downtime element that is missing, isn't it? That and the idea that you can please yourself. Both those are out of the window.

We ever stay in a hotel with the kids - it is pointless - imagine how nice it would have been is your DD were being a horror for one of you at least to be able to sleep whilst the other went and watched TV and looked after her in the sitting room?

DD thinks hotels are only for grown ups now - she hasn't ever stayed in one and they have some sort of mystical quality for her like chewing gum (which you aren't allowed until you can drive a car!)

ONE NIGHT IN HOTEL WITH DP with children palmed off with uncles/grandparents was must more of a 'break' than two weeks in Spain with the children

Ha Ha Ha- glad to see I'm not alone in hating hols with the kids. Took DD on holiday at 4 1/2 mths- bloody terrible, 18mths utterly terrible- included us getting ALL of our stuff stolen except pram- thanks. Again 2 1/2 etc, etc, etc. Any time we have done hotels it has been shocking. Self catering is much better but ditto the sleep issues.

Am just back from 2 weeks in Spain with DD and DS who both took alternate nights in getting up and was also woken EVERY night at 4.30am by other people coming home for work- just for good measure. Accept that hols will never be the same again. You will spend a terrific amount of money making yourself miserable abroad but at least will come back with a tan. Or you will spend a terrific amount of money making your self miserable without a tan. Either way you will be skint, miserable and knackered. Until they are old enough to leave home.

One of our solutions has been to abandon foreign holidays, or expensive holidays, and just go camping in the UK. the good bit is that if you have a good time, great (and we do OK at camping, we all like it). But if it's crap, at least you haven't spent a fortune to have a miserable time.

Holidays are undoubtedly different, but apart from a couple of times, we haven't had total nightmares. DS2 at 8 months was ghastly - jusst like OP's problem (he screamed a lot at night we were worried he'd wake DS1 and the grandparents who were supposed to help us out but were useless. We were knackered.)

On the brighter side, we usually go SC to same place in French Alps. It is perfect for kids. It is a long drive, but we stop half way in a brilliant B&B near Avallon. Can you believe 93 Euro for 2 separate fantastic bedrooms in recently renovated house which includes 4 course meals for all and a fab breakfast. Also very kiddy friendly. French motorway services are good for kids (lots of play areas + food ok and not so expensive as English ones).

I worry about hotels with small children. I know some people who wpent 5 days in a hotel with kids going to bed at 7pm and them hiding out in the loo reading books until their bedtime. Mad or what??

i'm obviously very late to this thread. We went on hols when DD2 was 9 months. It was a nightmare. She cried from what felt like the minute we got to the apartment, until the day we left, she woke through the night and arose at 5 am every morning when I had to wander around Lanzarote in the dark to try and get her to sleep. It was horrendous. Every holiday since then though (she's now 3) has been great. We've got 2 DDs and always try and stay in 2 bed apartment.

Mumof222boys - details of wonderful french B&B please. Do your boys have completely separate rooms? How old are they?

www.aupredupoirier.com

They had 2 sep bedrooms - one for me and DH and one for them, a hall and sep bath and sep loo. Just up stairs from where we ate, so the squawk box worked ok. Boys have sep bedrooms at home but not on holiday, but they were fine, luckily! We've stayed there a couple of times and are about to book again for just after Xmas, and have recommended it to others. They don't speak a lot of English, but are so friendly!