To want MIL to lock the dog in the kitchen when she visits (dog lovers, it isn't what you think!)

[ChirpyGirl]

PIL's are visiting with their lapdog, it's a toy breed (that doesn't shed, thank god)who is not trained and has always been a bit yappy. (and HATES me!)
She is very old and incontinent. Last time they were here she weed on my carpet at least once a day. Downstairs is 2 rooms, living/dining/playroom all open plan and ktichen, which has gate to lock children out.
They have been here 3 days, I have been at work for 2 of those days and they don't stay overnight here, and yet, in the small time I have been in teh house with them the dog has weed on kitchen floor twice, carpet in living room twice and I came home to poo on the carpet earlier.
DD1 is 2.7, DD2 is 11 months and very mobile. No-one spotted the poo until I pointed it out.

Now she is old, and is used to sitting on MIL's lap or climbing all over the sofa(on my sofa..which annoys me hugely, but no-one ever asked if it was okay years ago so can't say much now...) but I want to put a blanket or something in the kitchen and leave her in there locked behind the stairgate so if she does go on teh carpet I don't have to corral children to other end of room while someone clears it up.

Now, AIBU? Cos I know MIL won't want to do this, she will say that she is ill, or will miss her or sob sob whatever. DH is no help as he will just clean it up and think that's it, plus it is his dog too, so he makes the same excuses..she's old, it's not ehr fault...but why shoudl my children suffer, and my house smell so bad!

How can I best suggest this? Can't ban dog altogether as that means IL's don't come. They only visit for week at a time every month or so. Plus dog is not likely to last 6 more months so don't want to start massive fight but am LOSING MY MIND

Advice/help/comments welcome!

the only time I would take my dog to someone's house is if I'm walking round there (he's a guide dog) and then he stays on lead and is made to lie down and doesn't move. But I have a couple of friends who have dogs of their own who don't particularly take to other dogs and they've asked if it's ok if they pick me up as they don't know how their dog will react to mine which is fine with me.

But obviously my friends are aware that if I'm walking round it will be with dog. I wouldn't dream of turning up with just any dog though.

and although I don't mind people bringing their dogs here (house is like a menagerie anyway ) I would object to an incontinant dog, or one which couldn't behave ie was jumping on furniture etc as that's not how my dogs behave so is not how |I expect other dogs to behave.

exactly, wannabe.

we have a pal who has a guide dog, well, yes, Gus will be accompanying him on visits.

but he also doesn't wee and poop all over the floor, jump on the furniture, etc.

we also have to make sure the girls understand that if Gus is wearing his harness he is working and not to be disturbed.

Good luck

Must admit to a small roffle as you 'came home to poo on the carpet earlier.' Bless you.

Can you just get you MIL put down?

Well, had 'interesting' day.
Picked up MIL and went out for morning, dog stayed in car while we were in shops but she had brough a towel with her (unprompted) for her to sit on...all well and good.
Mil had medicated her and insisted there woudl be no issues.
Got home and DD1 wanted an indoors picnic for lunch, so I locked dog in teh ktichen. Offered blanket/towel etc but wasn't taken up on it. Dog did have some water (it has it's own bowl here) and happily (quietly) stayed in kitchen.
I had to go out, when I came back, dog was on sofa, suggested (Am such a wuss!)if she would be better in the kitchen, was told she was asleep so not an issue. Made curry for tea, suggested dog not be allowed to roam and eat it, dog was put on sofa to keep her under control.

However, no accidents today (that I was made aware of).

(DH spent all day in workshop with FIL so no real help!)

PS. all dogs are very welcome in my house, I do like them to be locked away at mealtimes as DD1 feeds them otherwise and I don't like dogs on my furniture, but have lots of friends with dogs who bring them over with no problems. I think I just feel uncomfortable asking MIL to do something different than she has assumed she is allowed to IYSWIM.

So, half winning, tomorrow we shall try again, but it did spend most of the day while I was here in teh ktichen and didn't do anything it shouldn't have, which is all I ask...I suppose....

well, one step forward! I think you have to disregard the fact that the dog didn't have an accident this time, as it's no good having this odd rules whereby the dog can stay on the sofa as long as it doesn't have an accident when you won't know until after the fact. IYSWIM.

Well done though, seems your MIL is going to dig her heels in.

BTW, our dog also goes away at mealtimes, I do not approve of dogs round the dinner table.