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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be v pissed off that dh has a condom in his wallet?

62 replies

petitmaman · 31/08/2008 13:38

Found condom in dh's wallet this morning. we don't use them. i know he had one in his bed side table for years but why transfer it to his wallet? it is about 3 years out of date anyway and i dont think he would cheat on me.
the only thing i can think is that he wants to look the big man in front of his friends, but if that is it then that is seriously immature. and who looks through his wallet anyway? (apart from me )
i just find it really odd. thoughts please.

OP posts:
findtheriver · 31/08/2008 19:41

Good luck xx Hopefully by airing the subject you will feel better anyway.. if he does have anything to feel guilty about then he'll know you're on to him. And if he doesnt and is just being one of the lads, then hopefully he will persuade you of that. And then grow up!!

nobodysfool · 31/08/2008 19:42

Good luck x

petitmaman · 31/08/2008 19:45

Ahh, yes, growing up. Does it happen with men eventually then? when? I thought wife, mortgage and 2 dcs might do it. Obviously not...

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ShinyPinkShoes · 31/08/2008 19:50

Let's just hope it's still in there when he gets home

I would be feeling quite edgy as to why he carries it around with him tbh.

nobodysfool · 31/08/2008 20:05

me too.

petitmaman · 01/09/2008 08:38

ok, spoke to dh this morning . first he tried to tell me that it had been in his wallet for years i just had not seen it .
Then he said he was the one from his bedside table and he had it in his wallet "because they are useful, not for me but in case a friend needs one. I have had to give them to friends before"
Itold him that his friends could fend for themselves and that I wasn't impressed he carried it round.
Verdict please, mumsnet jury

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NomDePlume · 01/09/2008 08:45

I think I'd punch DH's lights out !

Seems a bit weird that he'd be carrying them around for his mates, does he also have copies of their front door keys 'just in case' ?

Condom in wallet is something I envisage a teenage boy doing, NOT an adult MARRIED man.

beanieb · 01/09/2008 08:49

my verdict... would cheat if given the opportunity, is possibly planning to. Oh and a liar too.

hecate · 01/09/2008 09:00

he's hoping and planning to cheat on you if he gets the chance. He's not thinking of you, it's purely about him and what he can stick his dick into.

I hope it rots and falls off.

zippitippitoes · 01/09/2008 09:01

highly dubious to me

is he really known as the solicitous caring type who looks out for his friends potential lack of a condom

i wouldnt believe his explanation

scorpio1 · 01/09/2008 09:03

This is not on in my book....once when dh pretended he was going to cheat on me (long very jokey story btw ) he went to put a condom in his wallet....

I don't think his story is correct - they are grown men and can surely get their own condoms? (friends i mean)

petitmaman · 01/09/2008 09:03

Nom, my sentiments exactly. think we will be having another little chat this evening....

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VictorianSqualor · 01/09/2008 09:09

You can buy condoms in pub toilets.
At which point would you think 'Oh, I'm on a winner here, I'll buy a condom, actually, no, I'll ask my mate, he has been married for years, bound to have one'.....

IMO, I think he would cheat, and has possibly been in a situation where he could have, and didn't have a condom, so it's made him think about it. Whether or not he has already cheated I don't know.

DP also said the same btw, he'd never ask a friend for a condom, and wouldn't carry them unless he was planning on getting laid.

tiredemma · 01/09/2008 09:10

his friends can buy condoms from the machines in the tiolet surely???

Im sure most men would want to be assured that the condom they have is not 3 years out of date and likely to cause their knobs to rot off.

petitmaman · 01/09/2008 09:17

Love all this talk of knobs rotting off.
VS, sounds as though that could be the case and so funny and true about mates buying them in pub toilets.
God I love mumsnetters

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WickedBitchoftheEast · 01/09/2008 09:17

In my honest opinion if he has done it before he will do it again given the opportunity, and chances are that is why it's there!

As he has done it before he knows there is a good chance of getting away with it even if he is caught.

I think I would be packing his bag for him (even if it was just a warning) and I bet he does not even know they have a sell by date!

TinkerBellesMum · 01/09/2008 09:20

I agree with you, he's trying to look big standing at the bar when he opens his wallet and there is an obvious condom ring. It is immature though.

I don't think he would have had it there if he was really up to something, unless he is really stupid because he must know he's going to be found out and if it's out of date anyway then he's not going to use it, you'd hope! Again he would be really stupid.

lol wabbit, I used to be covered in "love bites" not that he ever asked I think he'd seen it happen often enough.

jojosmaman · 01/09/2008 09:43

But men who cheat/ intend to cheat/ would not rule out cheating can be stupid as it crosses into arrogance tinkerbellesmum. I've seen it with my own dad, who whilst not stupid in the conventional sense, was an idiot when it came down to cheating on my mum by doing things that even I suspected were wrong as a child (like having condoms in his drawer, mum had a hysterectomy at 29 and quickly leaving the table when he received mobile phone calls but then saying it was his brother or something, but deep dwon we all knew it wasn't but chose to believe him).

VinegarTits · 01/09/2008 11:17

Take it out of his wallet and bin it, if he asks where it went(which im sure he wont) then tell him 'why would you need an out of date condom it your wallet'? if he says nothing then problem solved. If he replaces it with a new one then be worried.

DrNortherner · 01/09/2008 11:19

Blmey. I would ask him outright. Any man in a committed relatioship has no need for a condom in his wallet.

NoMoreOlympics · 01/09/2008 12:49

please update us when you can

petitmaman · 01/09/2008 15:02

Don;t think he'll replace it now he knows I know(made him put it in the bin this morning.) What will his friends do without their supply?
will keep you posted

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memoo · 01/09/2008 16:36

I asked DP about this and he said that if a man is carrying a condom around he is hoping he will pull. simple as that.

I'm sorry, its a shit situation to be in, my heart really does go out to you

nobodysfool · 01/09/2008 17:08

I wouldn't trust this man as far as i could throw him.
He has had his 'chance' before as you say so i think he is either on the lookout to cheat or would consider it if it was offered.Either way, nobody deserves to be lied and cheated on.
Pack his bags.
Sorry if that sounds harsh.

Dogsby · 01/09/2008 17:09

he is lying

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