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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to want to destroy the stupid people in the parking lot

105 replies

lilysmummy2007 · 26/08/2008 15:42

there was a funfair at brockwell park over the weekend and yesterday was the last day, the only place to park is at the lido and it was full, but 3 families or rather 1 huge family with 3 cars were packing up to leave, so we sat in the car waiting, along with another car who thought the same, after taking 15 minutes to close their pram and put thier baby in one of the cars, with them looking at us and knowing we were waiting to park, they all then started a long family reunion at the car park, just blabbering for more than 30 mins, DP was very pissed off so we asked politely if they were leaving as we wanted to park as well, the one of the ladies barked in a coarse jamaican accent 'well you will just have to wait till we are ready to go' how rude!! i dont know where these people come from but i hate when the have no manners and are just plain rude. All the stupid woman had to say was they werent leaving yet or something and we would have just tried to find somewhere else, we just left as we had alreay wasted almost 40 mins waiting patiently. AIBU to be aggravated about this?

OP posts:

nappyaddict · 27/08/2008 21:55

lol at just because you are west indian it means you can't be prejudiced against jamaicans. that's like saying if a english person slags off the welsh they can't be being prejudiced because they are both in the uk.

hatrick · 27/08/2008 22:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Blu · 27/08/2008 22:59

How ridiculous!

The Lido car park serves the whole park, the gym, the Lido and visitors for attractions such as the fair - and it is a small small car park. On the other hand on-street parking all around the park - loads of side-streets around the entire perimeter of the park - is free at weekends. Why waste time witing fo like=gold-dust spaces in a tiny car park?

A family having a conversation IS using the park. Had their conversation happened 10m further into the park, on a picnic rug, would you have been telling them to stop talking and move their cars so you could park?

You are having a tantrum - grow up!

Original poster

lilysmummy2007 · 27/08/2008 23:34

yes blu, but you try getting out 3 kids and all the buggys and toys, picnic hamper etc on a side road in herne hill and walking with3 buggys, had we been able to park we would have only gotten the twins out in their buggies and my little one would just toddle along on the grass, and the car park is for parking, not blabbering, do you go to your local supermarket to meet your friends in the car park and blabber, NO, you call them,talk in the park, in the car, at home, and they saw us waiting but had no consideration to move 1 car, they had 3. Also this was monday, not weekend, and furthermore everyone going on about rasicm, and prejudiced, and about me judging the lady i dont have to justify myself to you , you dont know me so dont judge me,i know im not. Stop clouding the point of the post with the bullshit about jamaican and race, i simply mentioned jamaican to get my point across as anyone who has had words with someone from jamaica will know what im talking about, if all those bumkins who are so up themselves and politically correct want to rant about me being racist feel free. just think about anytime youve had a run in like mine or anything that annoyed you and tell me you wouldnt be angry. and nappy addict please dont compare the UK with the west indies, it is worlds apart, we support each other not slag them off, again it was the womans tone that annoyed me and thats what i was trying to put across.

OP posts:

nappyaddict · 27/08/2008 23:52

excellent post shoe gazer - i missed it before.

Ashantai · 27/08/2008 23:53

LOL, sorry i'm late lil but i've been at work. I'm west indian too and my parents come from jamaica which is why this thread interests me so.

Really, you do need to take a step back and take a breath cos i'm outta breath just reading this!

I've been in this situation too with my 3 kids, trying to find a space in a car park, but i would never wait around for 40 mins. I generally drive past and ask if they are leaving, if they say no, well its just my tough luck and i gotta go find somewhere else to park.

Did another space really not open up for the whole time you were waiting?

Raine3 · 28/08/2008 01:11

I was with you for a while there ... but I do think your remarks were out of order even if you are of mixed/black/chinese/indian or whatever race.

I am white/English and I have two cousins (who are sisters) who are married to black men, one African 'P' the other Jamaican 'A' ... A says he hates Africans as the are ... blah blah blah

I have an aunt who was adopted by my nan who is mixed race, who I have heard call the local Indian shopkeeper a thieving black b***d .... are you saying you have to be WHITE TO BE RACIST and if you are black/chinese/Indian and so on it's ok ?

KerryMum · 28/08/2008 01:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

lilysmummy2007 · 28/08/2008 02:07

kerry, read the whole post and you will see why, ashantai not a single spot opened up and we did not have a disabled badge as the twins mum is allowed to register only 2 cars with it and as we only have them once in a while, she has her car and her mums on it, raine please read my first post, where was i racist?? is jamaican a race?? again i suggest a few of you who are clearly so uneducated that they cant tell a race from a nationality enroll in some kind of anti Politically correct and general social studies class being held at you local community hall.

OP posts:

Original poster

lilysmummy2007 · 28/08/2008 02:14

ashantai im sure you can relate to the type of attitude and language the lady spoke to me in, the only reason i put jamaican was i ignorantly thought the members of mumsnet might understand this as well, i guess not, i dont see how me saying jamaican is racist, if i call you jamaican, does that mean black or white or green, Honestly!!

OP posts:

BouncingTurtle · 28/08/2008 07:19

It was entirely unnecessary to mention the woman's nationality. It was entirely unnecessary to say 'I don't know where those people come from'.

As for all your spouting off about Jamaican being a nationality not a race, we are not stupid. That is hair-splitting and not the point. It is not acceptable to make negative comments such as you have on the basis of race OR nationality. After all, it wouldn't be acceptable to say all English people are football hooligans!
You still come across as highly predujicial and you being mixed race and having friends and relations who are not white does not make you immune from predujice.

'i simply mentioned jamaican to get my point across as anyone who has had words with someone from jamaica will know what im talking about'
This is a sweeping generalisation and has quite nasty implications.

I'm sorry that it wasn't possible to use your friend's disabled badge to help you with the twins, but you had no more right than anyone to that parking space. If you had known how bad the parking can be there you should have got their earlier or given it up as a bad job.

hatrick · 28/08/2008 08:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

theressomethingaboutmarie · 28/08/2008 08:15

BouncingTurtle, you beat me to it. Lilysmummy, I accept that you are not racist but you don't do yourself any favours with the "I simply mentioned Jamaican to get my point across as anyone who has had words with someone from Jamaica will know what im talking about".

bergentulip · 28/08/2008 08:39

tbh if I had been one of the families chatting in the carpark I would have immediately told anyone waiting that we were going to be a while. Would they not feel uncomfortable with one, or more, cars lurking in the background?
She does sound rude.
I would have asked them also if they were going, within about 3mins.

Can everyone get off the racist bandwagon now though? I think it's clear there was a misunderstanding to the initial op, by how it was worded, but the point has surely been made.
Nationality of course still not relevant, but the 'where do they come from' comment came across to me in the way it was meant, ie, "where do these people come from? Were they brought up in a barn?".... used frequently in normal language to suggest bad manners! That much was obvious to me.

PheasantPlucker · 28/08/2008 11:11

LilysMummy - a blue badge should not be for any specific car. Ours is certainly not registered to one car. The badge should be for the child with a disability, so if the child goes in any car, and that car needs to park because of the disabilities of that child, the badge can be used. Which should make it easier for anyone trying to help families with a child with a disability by taking them out and about. (Friends have used ours when they kindly take dd1 out somewhere).

Just in case you use your car to take the children out again.......

nappyaddict · 28/08/2008 11:11

For all you knew they had gone back to the car to collect something and hadn't finished their day out or they could have been waiting for someone else.

KerryMum · 28/08/2008 11:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

lilysmummy2007 · 28/08/2008 12:21

addict, they had put their pram and baby in the car, and all their kit in the booth,Plucker, i didnt know that?? she doesnt either, as she has to go into the congestion zone often with them so only 2 cars can be registered on that, maybe she thought the same about the badge. and thank you Tulip, at least someone doesnt automatically think the worst and that was what i was trying to put across the fact that the woman had no manners, not because or race or nationality. hatrick, its basic common sense that if someone sees you packing up in a lot and just stops behind you and is looking at you or just sitting in their car, i know i would think they were waiting to park,and for the millionth time, I NEVER ASKED THEM TO MOVE, I SIMPLY ASKED IF THEY WERE GOING SOON AS WE WANTED TO PARK PARK IF THEY WERE MOVING.I didnt go and say that they had been there ages and had to leave, or carry on like i owned the lot.

OP posts:

nappyaddict · 28/08/2008 12:25

why did you wait half an hour before asking them though? if they weren't ready to go they weren't ready to go. they probably hadn't seen eachother for ages or something!

Ashantai · 28/08/2008 13:43

"ashantai im sure you can relate to the type of attitude and language the lady spoke to me in, the only reason i put jamaican was i ignorantly thought the members of mumsnet might understand this as well, i guess not, i dont see how me saying jamaican is racist, if i call you jamaican, does that mean black or white or green, Honestly!!"

You can call me what you want tbh , but you do have to admit that you set yourself up (albeit unintentionally) by the wording of your original post.

If this woman had been white irish, would you have said that she barked at you in a coarse irish accent?

In my job i've met rudeness by every nationality you can think of and it doesnt matter where someone comes from, rude manners are everywhere, and i just dont think nationality needed to be brought into it.

Just my two cents

Blu · 28/08/2008 14:13

I do sympathise with your frustration...and that car park does bring out the worst in people - if you had had a Blue Badge there is no guarantee that the disabled space would have been accessible because people routinely park all the way around it - leaving it 'free' but completely unusable.

A few weeks ago the whole car park was closed for a few days because of people double parking outside the spaces and blocking emergency access. People are stupid and selfish where parking is concerned.

That she was rude is relevant - that her accent is Jamaican is not...and to continue to emphasise that Jamaican rudeness is somehow worse than other nationalities rudeness as a way to get sympathy from the ordeal you suffered does come across as discriminatory and prejudiced against Jamaicans.

From my detailed knowledge of the car park you might guess where I live....

Original poster

lilysmummy2007 · 28/08/2008 14:38

would everyone please read bergent tulips post and realise i was not having i go at jamaicans!! and i would have said irish accent, just so everyone would imagine the conversation themselves and understand the tone of the exchange.nappy addict, your post are now pointless, i dont know why you are trying to justify the reason they were there as i dont care how long they were going to stay, the point was i asked nicely and felt insulted my the womans rude, harsh manner when speaking to me .

OP posts:

nappyaddict · 29/08/2008 11:06

but imo she wasn't rude. that's my point. she was just pointing out they weren't ready to go yet.

StealthPolarBear · 29/08/2008 11:14

"If I see someone waiting for my parking space I try to hurry. If I'm not going right away I tell them."
Yes, that is the polite thing to do, and I try to do that too. OTOH I am under no obligation to do so. OP, can't you see that if you've paid for a parking ticket you are entitled to use it for as long as you want without having to justify yourself to anyone else in the car park? If she fancied sitting in a car park and reading a book in the driver seat then that's completely up to her.
I'm going to ask the question - is this a troll? She really knows the nasty little ways to wind people up.

sagacious · 29/08/2008 11:23

Parking lot?

It just makes me wince

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