To want to tell my PILs to go and stuff their 50th wedding anniverary "Luncheon" up their arses

[CountessDracula]

am very

They sent us an invitation today to this without including dd (who will be 6). dh and I both very upset and livid. His wanky father will be behind it - he is a cold fish and doesn't really approve of children I reckon. He wants to have some poncetastic lunch and not have children runnning around.

DH called and spoke to MIL, said we were very hurt, that this is not just A child but their only grandchild (apart from one other who is grown up). That she loves parties and that she wouldn't understand why she wasn't invited to a family LUNCH ffs (if it were dinner I could just about understand it.

They have always been more interetsted in their wanky social life than their granddaughter. I don't care really, my parents are very involved and we get plenty of help but MIL leaves pathetic gushing messages on teh answerphone "Oh I am just leaving a messgage for my gorgeous lovely granddaughter, I wish I could see more of her" etc etc

bollix
If you want to see more of her invite her to family lunch!

Anyway they have backed down but tbh I feel like saying I have something better to do that day

GRRRRRRRRRRR
Oh adn they said "oh we were going to talk to you about it tomorrow" ... er..HELLO ... well don't send the invitation out then you cunts.

lol get it all out. Hire some unsavoury sorts to turn up and cause havoc at the next table.

FFS!

I must say when this sort of thing comes up on those "why haven't my dcs been invited to a wedding" threads I'm always on the side of "leave the kids at home and have a good time" but this is DISGRACEFUL!

What do they think your dd is going to do? get pissed and embarrass everyone?

Oh good I'm glad it's not just me being oversensitive

Of course the other grandchild has always been invited to everything when she was small. But that is their dd's gd. Who they virtually brought up.

sorry their dd's dd!

Honestly they are the most obsessive social animals I have ever met. Nothing stands in the way of their fucking social life. It is scary to watch, dh and I always shake our heads in horror at it! But this really takes the biscuit

I think you should use cornsilk's suggestion. Do you know any badly behaved alcoholics who could be bribed to book the next table?

um yes
us

Where is it? I'll do it.

omg
I could pay for a load of mumsnetters and their dcs to come and sit next to them

heheh

This is the man who wouldn't let his children eat eggs in front of him as it revolted him too much.

So it would have to be egg based lunch

Knowing them they have a private room
They hired the whole bloody Berkeley for the evening do for their 40th anniversary (after a reception for about 4 million people in Belgravia first)

"well don't send the invitation out then you cunts. "

LOL Brilliant

Blimey are they royalty or something?
What about a strippogram? Anonymous gift of course.

omg
that is such a fantastic idea

Will suggest to dh

I also thought I would suggest that we send them a dvd of Festen for FIL's birthday. That should put the shits up him

(googles Festen)

I'm gonna go against the grain here and say it is their party. Elderly people wanting an adult-only lunch time celebration is hardly the crime of the century. In your shoes, I'd simply have said it was difficult to find someone to mind her at that time and you'd appreciate it if she could come along. Having a child there does change the dynamic of a get together. Most of us will think they add to the celebration, but different strokes for different folks.

No need for the drama and guilt trips. They have backed down now, anyway, and you are still livid. So I am guessing this is about more than just a lunch.

oh of course it is!

This is just symptomatic of the sort of wankers they can be.

I get on really well with MIL, she has always been kind and welcoming to me

FIL is just a brat basically. He has sulks all the time. He always wants everything exactly how HE wants it. He was a cold tyrant to dh when he was growing up. I know he will go into a massive sulk about this.

But I don't see why we shouldn't say something about it when it affects our dd. She was excited about the party. How do we say "they don't want you there"?

Oh and they know we can find someone to look after her no problem. In fact I woudln't be surprised if they have already sorted out some vile crone in their village to do it. They are very controlling.

I would rather tell the truth (we are hurt) than try and make some crap up. Why shouldn't they know?

Did the invite actually say 'luncheon'?

pmsl
yes
it did

I would say don't go, but it's a free luncheon

I'm not proud

(all that makes me think is that we might get luncheon meat )

And spam and egg pie

Quiche!!!!!!!!!11

oh yes
greasy quiche
vol au vents

etc

Festen

[smug got the reference emoticon]

There's no such thing as a free luncheon