To think people should mind their own damn business?

[Babymumma]

My gorgeous ds has a small, light brown birthmark on his left cheek & I am sooooo sick of people commenting on it! Seriously, a woman in the dr's today asked "whats that?" so I said "it's a birthmark" she then said "oh, but you can have them removed these days can't you" WTF! I told her in no uncertain terms that it is part of my son & I don't want to change a hair on his head. This is not the 1st time dp & I have had this conversation with compete strangers and i think it is very rude. AIBU?

The issue isn't so much with people noticing his birthmark, although I would never be so rude as to point this out on another child. The issue is with the amount of people who inform me that I can get it removed if I wish to. I don't see it as unsightly & it is part of my gorgeous little boy. If a child asks, which they have done, that is different. Children are naturally inquisitive and usually ask quite innocently. I just feel it is rude for people to suggest that I see my son as anything but perfect. Thanks to all pp's who agree with me. I have to say, all babies are cute though and I have a real problem with anyone passing negative comments about any babies. This could be a cue for a mil rant but I shall spare you all lol.

YANBU, my little boy has a patch of hair that is a different colour and so from the time of birth we call it his special colour and he loves it. The amount of people who have asked if I dye it or said 'how strange' is unreal. We have made it a lovely thing and so he's never minded.

Hijack, Hi Riven.... I'll be back in a month. Welcome back to MN!!

when my dd was born her skin was all purple and mottled. she looked like she was permanently doing a poo! But no one ever said a word to me, if they did they'd be walking away with 2 broken legs!
Honestly,if someone really upsets you why not allow yourself to reply "I knew you would know about these things. Of course, they can do all kinds of things nowadays, I read about Laser hair removal, very effective on chins, wait, I have it here in my bag for you, rummage, rummage.
Sometimes,these people do not have the wit to comprehend what they are saying. Your lo looks gorgeous btw

It's appalling how rude people are. I'm always telling my five-yr-old not to make what my mother called 'personal remarks' - obviously some people's mothers never taught them this.

It's so not OK to comment on physical differences - how can it sound anything other than critical even if someone (who is a grown-up) 'asks' innocently about a birth-mark.

I'd go further and say that people (random strangers I mean, not one's nearest and dearest) are on dodgy ground commenting on any baby's physical appearance in anything other than overflowingly complimentary terms - 'what a cute baby', 'look at those beautiful blue eyes', etc. Probably people don't think before they speak - but for example if you have a baby who is failing to thrive and you're horribly anxious, you don't welcome people saying 'what a TINY baby'. Or if your baby has poor circulation, you just want to punch the ninny at the doctors' surgery who says 'look at her mottled skin, she must be freezing'. Etc. These are of course not hypothetical examples, but things that ignorant folk have said about my little DD2 who has a serious heart condition. I know people don't mean anything by it, but having DD2 has made me realise it's important to think twice before saying anything about how a baby looks.

Oh people are just sooo rude!

My dd has a tea stain little birth mark on the top of her left cheek, if anyone ever said anything so rude i think i would have told them where to go...

I like dd's it is a part of her.

Your ds is gorgeous

your lo is beautiful the way he is my dd had to have a large growth removed above her eye, I used to get asked if I had dropped her! Now she has a scar and I get asked about it. Your cute little boy will have designer stubble all over that little cheek before you know it, enjoy kissing it while you are still allowed x ( before he pushes you off)

I think the birthmark looks cute!
It's no one's business to make personal comments about your ds. You should tell them off!!

He's gorgeous, babymumma. Don't let anyone ignorant enough to make personal remarks bother you. It's a sign of their own inadequacies.

DD1 used to have a bad squint. A woman in our local post office came up to me once and said 'I hope you don't mind me saying, but I think you might not have noticed there is something wrong with your daughter's eye'. No shit Sherlock!! The squint was massive! I live with dd1 every day, and we were treating it at the time with patching. When I was clearly taken aback, the woman continued on that 'these days' mothers don't always notice things like they did in the past....!!??! What?!!
I saw her again on a bus a few montsh later, and she said, 'you still haven't looked at your daughter's eye'. At this point I decided to enlighten her that she was currently being treated for a number of conditions, including a shunt for hydrocephalus and CP. The woman then got very indignant and (in a Les Dawson manner) declared 'well, I was only saying'.
Sorry to hijack post, but to OP 'yes' people are very rude, and YANBU. And, yes, I feel quite strongly about this!!!!!!

Dds got a strawberry mark on her lip here
We do get alot of people asking about it but I found it were mostly people who were concerned that she had hurt herself, never anything negative. People will ask, its human nature.

incidentally we are having it removed in september.

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there even !

Pheasant you made me lol. Some people are such pillocks huh? I think narky has got it spot on! I already have to pin him down to get a kiss & he's only 9 months.

WM - I hope all goes well for your little cutie in September

WorzselMummage shew is beautiful, such a cheeky grin.

Pheasant - woman in P O was abominable rude -not just for mentioning the squint, but for telling you she knew better than you about your baby. I think the word is impertinent.
If she had just said "ooh what's the matter with her eye?", would that have been as bad?

Elastic - yes it was the assumption that she knew more about my dd than me that really threw me! I am still upset when people ask about dd's condition (she no longer has a squint following surgery, not just for cosmetic reasons but mainly because it was giving her a real visual field deficit) but am getting better at being polite to people who ask 'nicely' and question us after making initial chats. If that makes sense? Ie not straight in with 'what's wrong with her..... etc etc'.
I love the word impertinent by the way!

But in an ideal world strangers just don't make the comments at all.... and I am a size 8 with blonde hair..... !

having blonde hair is not so remarkable; nor is size 8 unless you have the size label on the outside or are 7 ft tall.

My dd used to have masses of curly blonde hair when she was about 3 and many people commented, saying I should get her into child modelling. I just snorted. I had enough trouble getting her into matching socks and presenting a clean face to the world.

He is gorgeous.

Very very hard not to get annoyed -- I certainly would.

Most people are complete fuckwits ... dont mean to be rude, not even aware they are being rude and would actually think you were if you told them to mind their own.

I think I would just say

Please dont be rude about my baby -- its hurtful and unneccessary even if you dont mean to be rude. I don;t pass comment about your appearance.

But then YOU feel like the baddie right ... tchh ... spose it might make them think twice before commenting again.

ElasticWoman - In an ideal world I am blonde....(I have curly dark hair and I am size 12-14!)

Don't really see how being blonde and size 8 is any more ideal than being size 12-14 (like me) and having curly dark hair (not like me).

Oh my goodness, Babymumma, my DS4 has almost exactly the same birthmark on his right cheek! In my ignorance I didn't realise things like this were so common! It's wierd but most people don't mention it to us. He is due to start school in Sept and I do worry for him for the future with bullying etc but I can't imagine him without it now, he wouldn't be the same! My Doctor commented 'at least he's not a girl', when he saw it the first time!!! There was an actor with similar mark, I think he was in Little House on the Prarie (showing my age now!)