To think people should mind their own damn business?

[Babymumma]

My gorgeous ds has a small, light brown birthmark on his left cheek & I am sooooo sick of people commenting on it! Seriously, a woman in the dr's today asked "whats that?" so I said "it's a birthmark" she then said "oh, but you can have them removed these days can't you" WTF! I told her in no uncertain terms that it is part of my son & I don't want to change a hair on his head. This is not the 1st time dp & I have had this conversation with compete strangers and i think it is very rude. AIBU?

Well, I have peered at the pictures and cannot even see a birthmark.
But wow, how handsome is your boy!! He is gorgeous.

My ds has a large (half a £5 note) cafe au lait mark on his thigh. When getting changed for PE / swimming at school he does occasionally get asked about it. He just tells them very matter of fact it is a birthmark and apparently that is the end of the matter.
A fe wweeks ago he brought home to contents of his school tray (end of year thing, class is having a clear-up) and in it was a 'school passport' he had had to complete. Under 'distinguishing features' he wrote 'large birth mark'. So I guess he is not fussed about it, it is just part of who he is!

lol SPB, the little sod stole a bourbon biscuit from another child at toddler group.

That makes me feel better RB. I never thought of it as an issue until other people started to mention it and I get upset on his behalf. I don't mind people asking what it is but to then suggest that I can get it lasered off his face .

One stupid mare asked me if he had poo on his face when he was tiny!!??

Of course YANBU. How rude are some people?
I would do a WinkyWinkola and make a snarky comment* about nosejobs/gastric band surgery/liposuction next time. I know it's lowering yourself to their level, but it's the only way some people will be told.

*I have never actually done this though.

Oh, FGS - he is cute as a button, I can't even see the birthmark in the pics.

I'm afraid I'd be inclined to meet such rudeness with rudeness, although I know it probably upsets the karmic balance of the universe or something, but honestly...

My friend's DS has a red birthmark on his forehead, and he is on one of the boxes of Plum babyfood - her friend was involved in it somehow (photographer? can't remember) and wanted to use him because he's soooo gorgeous.

Wow Mog, you know a famous baby lol! which box is he on? I use plum for lo when we go out.

I can't see it. Is it under the food ?

I think the only reasonable response to any sort of question about it is:

You: "What about that red mark on your face"

Them: "I don't have a red mark on my face."

You: "Not yet...."

I can't see it at all

Think PeaMcL's retort is best!
It is very rude to mention it - what would they think if you went up to them saying 'ooh, you can get hair transplants/liposuction etc. now"
Anyway your ds looks lovely and happy in his pics

Very rude and insensitive, honestly some people hae shit for brains.

My DD has a sort of birthmark on her face, it was quite prominent when she was born, now it is barely there, although sometimes it shows up. These are quite common apparently. It is in the shape of a V and i call it her lizard mark - i wouldnt change it for the world.

A bit different is the comments my mum gets. She has a medical condition that means that her skin is very dark, she appears black in fact is darker than many black people. Her features of course are "English" or is it Anglican or Anglo? Anyway, the amount of people who say to her "oh wow, thats an amazing tan" or "have you been in the Sun"? I mean WTF has it got to do with them in the first place, i think some of these people think its a compliment. She deals with it quite well and laughs it off, but it irritates the hell out of me. I actually let people dig for a bit and then watch them squirm when i say, well actually she has a life threatening medical condition and this is part of it!

If I were minding my own damn business I wouldn't come on MN would I?

Erm . . . . . .Elasticwoman, did you actualy read the thread? or just reply to the title?

Dunno, babymumma - think it might be something like lamb and sweet potato casserole? Think maybe it was one for slightly older babies. Not sure though - I am in between all of that at the mo, as DS1 is 2.5 and DS2 not yet on solids, so not looked for a while!

They've probably changed the packaging by now, and I will look like a bizarre fantasist, trying to make out I know a famous baby

DS1 has a large red birthmark on his arm - I actually don't mind people asking what it is (although I think its very obviously a birthmark) but I mind when people then go on to comment about it negatively - what a shame etc.

As for school I think children are much more factual and accepting (at least at a young age) - DS2 has a nursery helper who is a wheelchair user, and when I asked him why she used a wheelchair (she has cerebral palsy - I wondered what the children had been told) he just looked at me like I'd gone mad and said "she was just born that way, why do you want to know?" - fair enough!!!

i was born with huge red birthmark above my eye and my mum had all sorts of comments about me

mum just told them it was abeauty spot all the kids went off crying that they wanted one as i got older it dissapeared and was left with what looks like a scar above my eye so now get comments on that they think ive been fighting or something

really ignore peoples ignorance

Only thing I would say is that BIL & his wife refused to acknowledge 1 of my neices birthmarks across one cheek, lots of small ones... she is now 19 and absolutely despises the marks & wants them off..... but would have to pay or wait aeons.
If they did it/got referral when she was teen or younger she would be happier now.
Its down to confidence really.
My dd has 1 on her cheek, small dot with radiating teeny lines, she isnt really aware of it, if she mentions it, we will consider removal when she's older, before she's adult!

Agreed it is out of order... but I honestly believe that some people just seem to think that where babies are concerned there are no limits or boundaries, so they can say or do what they like. The number of times I had strangers giving me advice that my baby was hungry when it wasn't asked for, or comments that my little girl shouldn't be dressed in blue, and I also had comments on her stork mark (now gone) too. It is intensely irritating. I think if you wouldn't do it to another adult / older child, then its not appropriate for someone else's baby either.

YANBU - I am constantly shocked by the level of rudeness by some people

I did read the OP but I still think that most of us want to discuss other people's bodies, behaviour etc while not having them mention ours.

I don't think it's particularly rude to mention a birth mark, but I do think it's rude to imply that such a mark should be erased, as if we all have to be perfect and look exactly as the onlooker wants us to look.

Arghhh why do people need to be stupid and comment on birth marks? I have one on my left cheek and even now in my 30's people feel a need to comment on it.

DS has a cafe au lait on his left leg and a new nursery nurse felt the need to query it apparently she though it looked like and old bruise. Ohh boy did I have fun with her and the Nursery manager I had to get his red book out and show the remarks from the HV regarding the mark.

Another friend has children with mongolian blue spots and had to get the GP to document them in her red book as she was allways being asked about them by well meaning professionals.

Riven, re people asking what's wrong with your dd: there's only one thing worse than being noticed, and that's not being noticed. Would you prefer every one to ignore her? Of course people want to know what the matter is, if you look a bit different. Couldn't it be the way in to a civilised conversation?

I think it's great that people who are a bit different can still go out in public in this country. In some other parts of the world they are just locked away.