To think my brothers girlfriend is just bloody weird?

[bonnibaby]

Went to visit my brother at the weekend with DH and DC.
My brothers girlfriend stayed in the bedroom the whole time,never even came to say hello.
I asked my brother if she was ill or something,he said no, then when i went up to the loo he said to say hello through the door as she was up.
Did this and she said hi back and muttered something about me not wanting to see her today as she had no makeup on and hadnt done her hair...
Just thought it was really rude and a bit strange,theres no history of bad feeling there or anything,we have always got on fine but she is VERY vain,spends a fortune on her looks etc .My mum says she has done this before to her too.
We were there an hour or so so if she had been THAT bothered surely she could have stuck a bit of lippy on...

[bonnibaby]

Yes, i phoned them that morning to ask if it was ok to call, we went about 3 pm.
Brother seemed his usual self and not angry/upset/cross as if they had rowed.
She was texting him while we were there to take her stuff upstairs, drink etc...

[citronella]

Bizarre. Most people would be up by 3pm surely and have had time to sort out face/hair whatever problem they got up with. If she was sick they should have just said.

[PinkPussyCat]

My SIL is like this (that's why the thread caught my eye tbh!) and always has been. She is utterly disinterested in anything to do with our side of the family and always has been. She has never initiated conversation with me or dh, not even a 'Hi how are you' and wears a pained/bored expression at all times during family gatherings. She also hid from us on a couple of occasions! We actually don't bother visiting them anymore as we used to leave their house thinking 'we must be really hideous relatives to have round!'
I guess at least this girl is good with the dc's. But texting from upstairs is pretty damn rude IMO.

[citronella]

Very rude - bonnibaby's sil and PinkPussyCat's sil.

[gagamama]

If she's any older than 17 and this wasn't your first time meeting her, then YANBU.

Totally bizarre behaviour from a 30-year-old though. I sometimes feel awkward around certain members of DPs family, but I'd at least say hi before making my excuses to keep me out the way. Maybe she just had stomach cramps or a migraine or something, but even so, it seems weird not to just say she's feeling under the weather.

[zippitippitoes]

i reckon she was annoyed you came

and was cross db said ok

[PinkPussyCat]

Bonnibaby you can come round to mine for a cuppa anytime!

[zippitippitoes]

i am not fussed about seeing family for calling round chit chatty visits i think its really boring

[PinkPussyCat]

We all live quite far apart as a family so don't really get to do the popping round thing. So it's not like SIL was sick of the sight of us or anything! They live about 180 miles from us (and are obv glad)

[moondog]

What afucking loon.
My lovely neighbour's gf canbe like this. The neighbourson the other side went for dinner with him and realised about 2hoursin that shewasupstairs. She never came down.

[Upwind]

On the other hand one of DH's best friends is married to a woman who quite literally spends a hour getting her makeup and hair right to go jogging! And went into hiding once due to a bout of acne. So maybe she did not want you finding out that sometimes she looks less than glam.

[PinkPussyCat]

Ooh was she peering through holes drilled in the ceiling like in Shallow Grave?

That is v odd + creepy

[PinkPussyCat]

Lapin I never thought of that. But then you'd make excuses not to have visitors wouldn't you? They did phone first

[solidgoldbrass]

Maybe your brother has given her two black eyes and she didn't want to see you because she expected you would blame her for being 'wierd'. You don't sound as though you like her very much anyway.

[stitch]

i dont think she is weird. i think she is rude. way beyond rude in fact

[bonnibaby]

Aw thanks PPC

[scottishmum007]

i've done this when we've had visitors but i was breastfeeding at the time and wanted to be left alone. i wouldn't get upset about it, sometimes people prefer to be on their own for a bit, even if visitors are in.
It's not rude at all, not everyone wants to be socialable all of the time.

[potoftea]

It comes across a being very odd and rude(especially the texting bit) but maybe she suffers from panic attacks or some anxiety disorder and was having a bad day. If it happened again I'd ask her straight out.

[shybaby]

Any chance at all she could suffer from depression? Because when you do, some days you really cant face people for reasons unknown to yourself even. I wouldn't mention it tbh.

[sunnytimes]

Message withdrawn

[pooter]

I think shybaby has a good point. I know that at times people must have thought that i was completely rude/weird for not speaking/staying inside etc, but i was suffereing from depression which can strike at the most inopportune moments - and i used to stay hidden if at all possible, virtually shaking and willing for my partner/mum/whoever i was closest to at the time to come back to me. Im a teacher too, and i know i come across as very confident, but some days i cant use the phone/go outside the house. I wouldnt be too hard on her - you dont know why she was upstairs.

On the other hand she could be just plain weird

[stitch]

i think she was rude.
there are no mitigating factors
if there are guests in the house. then you come out and say hello. you put a face on. and youdeal with it.

breastfeeding si different. when you finsish feeding, then youcome out and say hello.

i find people who stay in their rooms, and don t even at least pretend to not be in, incredibly incredibly rude. and i certainly wouldnt be visit ing them, ever again.

[zippitippitoes]

the texting etc just says to me she didnt want you to be there and she was annoyed with db for saying you could come and she was determined to make a point to him

why she didnt want you there who knows

maybe she had other plans