Very late friends

[Earlybird]

I arranged to meet two friends that I have not seen for about a year for supper (we've moved, and are back for a visit). The two friends between them agreed 6.30 as the time to meet - which surprised me a bit, as they both work in office jobs. But, I didn't question it.

I arrived at the restaurant at 6.30, as arranged. They arrived as follows:

Friend 1 at 7.15 citing bad traffic
Friend 2 at 8.10 citing work issues that kept her late at the office

How would you have reacted, and what would you have said/done?

The first time I met DH's brother and g/f (now my BIL and SIL) they were well over an hour late.

They had said they weren't coming to dinner initially (was the first time I met DH's parents too) then decided they were and wanted FIL to change the booking to accommodate them as they like to eat later. FIL didn't/couldn't change the booking so they just turned up at the time they wanted to eat and left the four of us sitting there waiting for them in a busy restaurant on a Saturday night. The restaurant only got one sitting out of that big table that evening, which must have pissed them off. BIL and SIL did not bother calling to say they were going to be late, in fact they didn't even bother coming up with an excuse as to why they were late.

My BIL and SIL very much do think that they are more important than everybody else and I really think you can tell a lot about somebody's attitude towards you if they pull this kind of rubbish.

Your friends were very wrong to put you in this situation - particularly as they arranged the time to meet so could presumably have made it later if they knew they were unlikely to be able to make it.

I think lateness is just one of those things where personality makes such a huge difference. I honestly don't think most people who are habitually late think 'MY TIME IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOURS', I think they are just a bit disorganised and optimistic - always thinking they will leave on time, not allowing for traffic etc. etc. etc.

It's not a slight or intended as an insult. If it's any comfort, whenever I'm running late, I get really stressed worrying about the person I might be delaying. In fact I'm not usually that late, and often not late at all, because I worry so much about it - but somehow I can only manage to get somewhere on time by getting really stressed about it and panicking that I'm going to be late.

Before the railways, punctuality was less precise anyway - 10 minutes late wouldn't have mattered because no-one measured time in that detail in everyday life. I blame bloody Isembard Kingdom Brunel!

What I mean is, some people are naturally good at being on time (and I know they make the effort etc. etc. etc. but still...) and some people aren't. Those who aren't should of course try their best to be on time but it's just something we are not great at. Like some people not being brilliant at grammar or spelling - I could argue it's just sheer laziness not to look up the correct usage of a word, but I wouldn't, because I accept that some people find it hard and have other demands on their time and attention etc. etc. etc.