to think that people should concentrate more on the children they already have rather than being desperate for more?

[fairyfog]

we cant all have what we want in life, can we not just be happy with the children we have and give them our full love and attention?

obviously fairyfog didn't want a debate or discussion, merely to shit-stir and upset some people....

Message withdrawn

Interesting the OP hasn't come back.

Pretty insensitive post TBH.

Message withdrawn

I sometimes feel that I'd like another baby, but not a child - iyswim.

fairyfog - I assume you have never had fertility issues...

I am assuming here that you are talking about secondary infertility.

I pity any friends of yours that may suffer from this.

And have to say that my DD is very much loved, has all my attention, is well adjusted, is happy, is my life (along with DH). Doesn't stop me having a dreadful longing for that illusive second child, a sibling for her, though. Fortunately my consultant is more supportive - I find my test results, following my two ops (caused by birth of DD), next week to see whether I have a chance or not. This isnearly 4 years on from first TTC for #2.

Try empathy rather than condemnation.

it appears OP has left the building having realised they perhaps ought to rephrase/cancel their post...

Well if the existing child/children were being mistreated then fair enough.

However having taken nearly 3 years to conceive my much wanted second child i would have been gutted if someone had said that to me.

I always felt incredibly lucky to have one child and no secondary infertility is not the same as being unable to have one child but it is still very hard.

IME the longing for the second child was as profound as that for the first. The fact that I already had a child did not make me feel that I wanted the second less.

Phew, I have none and I am starting to think I am barren. Lucky escape from the OP for me then!

I hate it when people post once and then don't respond to what other people say. Oh and I hate it more when they come back and say rthey were busy.

Is this just another one of those deliberately antagonistic posts from someone who is bored on a rainy evening?

why do you care, ff?

what's it matter to you how many kids someone has or what their reasons are for it?

Ditto what Pruners says.

a troll me thinks?

that's funny bubble, i'd quite happily have another child, but not a baby

there's a deal to be done here...

bubble, that exactly how I feel.

I love the idea of having a newborn but hate the idea of having another child.

I'm finished with babymaking.

As the OP hasn't been back I'm wondering if she's a troll, but anyway...

I think that you shouldn't project your own thoughts and desires onto other people - just because you might be happy with 1/2/3/4 kids doesn't mean other people won't feel a burning desire for more.

Personally, I wouldn't want more than two but I don't expect everybody to feel the same way that I do - what a boring world that would make.

I also think the OP implies that people who are desperate for more children in some way neglect or don't cherish the ones they have, which I find very unlikely.

???

Where's OP

oh and to the OP, yes YABU imo.

am utterly confused by this OP

I think she obviously feels that somebody she knows can't cope or give enough to the children she has rather than continuing to knock em out.

"I think she obviously feels that somebody she knows can't cope or give enough to the children she has rather than continuing to knock em out."

the title of the thread suggests otherwise.