AIBU about nursery parents Car?

[JakeyRolling]

There is a parent at DD’s (3) nursery who drives a Tesla.
He has set the locking sound of the vehicle to a snarling dog.
DD has always been wary of dogs, mainly because she hasn’t been exposed to them as my dog died before she was born.

Recently, she has been starting to get over this and been willing to look at dogs, and even pat a couple that she knows well.

However this morning this vehicle parked next to us and she heard the snarling and became very upset.
I’ve got to admit, I did a double take (the car was behind me) As I thought it was a real dog going mental inside someone’s car.

Am I being unreasonable to think that you must be absolutely brain-dead to think that is an appropriate sound anywhere, let alone and nursery full of children?

This is so bizarre, I read this post this morning and had never heard of this, i didnt know you had the ability to change the noise and certainly not to a dog growling. Anyway I was out walking with my little boy this afternoon and 2 men were chatting beside a Tesla picking their children up from half term club when one of the men locked the car and I heard the growling noise. I am not scared of dogs at all but I must admit I was a bit like what was that?! It took me by surprise, its very loud and when youre not expecting it, it can make you jump. My 2 year old didnt react at all!

Get her to meet a friendly, calm dog (guessing if you used to have one, you still know friends that do), but also go through warning signs. So when she's ready, we do a checklist before touching the dog, did we check with owner, is he sitting, is he quiet, dog body language etc. And you can say that most dogs are nice, but some have been treated badly and they might snarl, and that silly man must not be very nice to his dog if he wants his car to sound like that.
As to why he has it, Teslas went from being what cool, nice guy pro-environmentalists had, to, well, a car people judge you for, so maybe the man thinks the noise might make people believe he has a fierce dog he'll set on anyone who bothers him about it (correct me if I'm wrong, but it's about the only car that you can safely leave dogs in as air con runs when the engine is off)! Or did he let his own kid pick the sound? I'd be tempted to ask.

Weird to think that he’s set this noise solely for the nursery run!

Also weird to think someone would choose this sound for ‘gangland’! Not sure where ‘gangland’ is, but I would think having a dog noise coming from your car would be social suicide in that sort of place.

Much as I wouldn’t choose this option (not that I have a Tesla!), it could be that he was messing about with the sounds with his child, and letting child choose the sound.

Wherever this guy chooses to drive and park, this is an embarrassing sound to have chosen for himself!

You do realise for a lot of kids a fear of dogs sadly isn’t irrational?

I recently worked with the family of a boy I was permanently scarred by a dog attack.
The dog Got out of the garden and made it way to Lee Park where it chased about 30 children and bit two of them.

When it got to Court, the dog’s owner had commissioned a behavioural report because he wanted to save the dog.

Thankfully the judge saw through it and ordered that it be put down.

but that child was still having nightmares and was fearful of any dog - not just the breed that attacked him.

We are doing this process, but it’s not instantaneous.

she’s never run away screaming from them but it’s more the kind of wariness that comes from not being exposed to something.

Important thing when you’re trying to Overcome fear is to go at the child speed and not push it because then you risk embedding the fear further

A fear of dogs is not irrational.

How do you know my humour is high brow or low brow?

I'm just pointing out pretty much everyone else will be at the novelty lock sound, as they were with people's novelty ringtones.

That’s an extreme case and not irrational for any child to have fear, but you do know that people have traumatic experiences everyday. Men harm more people than dogs, should all men stay mute and out of sight for fear of triggering someone? Of course not, the best thing to do with fear is to try and overcome it. Even the child you worked with shouldn’t be hidden from the triggers that cause them fear, what would you suggest they do with this child, never visit a park, don’t go to anyone’s home who has a dog or do you work with them to overcome their ordeal and get them to a place where they can cope with a car that mimics dog noises. So they can have some semblance of control over their fears. Fears left to fester get worse as you get older. The more they’re exposed to the fear the less scary it becomes. Even the lad you worked with it’s in his best interest to know not all dogs are aggressive and whilst he may never want to pet one its imperative he is able to be in the company of one without being overwhelmed will fear

My daughter went to cynophobia classes due to being scared of dogs.

She used to run into road to get away. Or climb up me or my mum to get away.

Luckily the class really helped.

I had this recently when id somehow changed the doorbell sound. It was barking dogs. I actually had to look outside as I thought there was a really aggressive dog. The battery was going which was why the sound didnt play out inside. Just heard by the postman.

I would jump a mile if I heard it from a car.
I suppose they have it as a deterrent from people touching car.

it is if the fear is in itself causes irrational behaviour. Being spooked and crying because a car barked at you can understandably upset a small child, what gives credence to that fear is how the parent then reacts to it. If you validate the fear you feed it. Picking up the child and taking it to the car and showing no dog is there and explaining this car makes funny noises & maybe even waiting for the dad to return and asking him if he minds showing your child the other noises it makes quickly because they got a little spooked will do more good than just complaining (even if you do believe he shouldn’t have it on). It would take a massive prick to say no. You can either stand indignant that someone has upset your child or you can take the lesson that’s presented itself and deal with it and take the opportunity to help your child become a more grounded individual.

It might just be the Halloween stuff. If you turn it on the car will growl at anyone who gets too close.

Could be a self limiting problem.

What are you on about? A fear of dogs certainly isn’t irrational!

More likely he’s got a big stupid dangerous status symbol dog