Want some ideas apart from mum and baby groups

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I need some ideas of things to do with my three month old now the weather has turned. I reached out in facebook in a local mums group asking for ideas because I am going spare at home. I specifically said I don’t want mum and baby groups, as we already do lots. I was wanting ideas of days out, things like aquariums (but we don’t have any locally), baby cinema that kind of thing. But all I got was local mum and baby groups spamming my post with adverts.

Whilst these groups are great, they only tend to last for a hour or two and they aren’t filling the days. What can I do to get out of the house? And am I being unreasonable for being irritated that as a mum I reached out for help on a mums group and all I got back was adverts

Baby swimming? Take baby home afterwards, they’ll sleep for ages and you can read.

Babies at that age don’t need all day activities, they need sleep, closeness to you and time at home. I appreciate you may want to be out of the house a lot, but that tends to work better with older children.

I struggled with my first so used to do a baby group in the morning then on some days the afternoons too, or the library or shops. Don’t just look at generic playgroups, structured stuff like Sing and Sign or Baby Sensory is much better if you can afford it.

Outdoors: go hiking with baby in a sling. Your waterproof will go round or take an umbrella. In a few months you can go running with a running stroller. What outdoor things did you do before? Skiing and open water swimming aren't really an option. We had a baby-mee attachment for the car seat on the bicycle which is good from 4 months although I wouldn't take it off-road.

What did you do before? Is the problem that you suddenly have a lot of free time rather than the baby? I learnt to knit and read a lot of books as well as lunching out a lot.

How comfortable are you with a sling? At 3 months, I always had mine in the sling and would go wherever I fancied! Galleries, the library, for long walks (weather permitting)… I just couldn’t do anything too physical, so no clothes shopping or lots of physical movement with them strapped to me.

I personally never did a mums and babies group, but I know a lot of my friends found them helpful.

Library

I used to do a three mile circuit with my babies. I’d walk a mile to the baby clinic for a weigh in - obviously not every day, but I’d walk through a pretty park instead, walk a mile to a coffee shop, then last mile up the hill home. That filled a good few hours, got us out in the fresh air and some exercise. I did it almost daily.

No it’s not that I want adult company. It’s I hate being indoors. If it were up to me I’d be out hiking or horse riding. We did lots of walking in the summer, but now it’s raining I feel bad taking them out for hours at a time in the rain every day.

Im in a regional small town so we don’t have any museums- that would be a train into the city.

Ive just never not worked and after several months I’m finding it hard going

It’s the weather permitting that I find tough!!

Ah, that's the challenge. It's lonely when everyone else is at work. There are limited adult groups where you can take the baby and most of the ones during the day are for retired people. I went back to work part time at 5 months because I was going mad with boredom. I restarted my evening hobbies within 6 weeks. Not much else I could suggest.

But the cutest baby clothes are those onesie type rainsuits! If they are very warm and waterproof you don't need to feel bad about taking the baby for long walks IMO. Good for you both. Horse riding is probably out though to be fair.

If you want to hike in the rain you can definitely do that. Ordinary pram with good raincover, or a sling with good raincover and umbrella. You can also get Hamax bike trailers with baby seats suitable from newborn. Or a running buggy. Maybe plan in some good stops along the way where you can get the baby out for a feed and a roll around. At three months all you need is an ordinary cafe, really - sometimes community cafes or church cafes have baby corners with mats and toys which are even better.

There are several accounts on instagram which post hiking with a baby. I saw them and thought "shit, why didn't I do that with mine when he only weighed a few kg?!).

is it you who doesnt like the rain? Baby wi be strapped to you and loving it! Choose your route so youre not walking into sidesys rain and dreess appropriately.

i reckon your mind and soul will feel better for it.

And it rarely rains heavily all day.

And take the train ride into the city - again, the journey is an exciting thing in itself for babies and small children.

Ive just never not worked and after several months I’m finding it hard going

I get this. And the hating being indoors.

Even if going somewhere means a train ride into the city- do it. Seriously, your baby will be happy doing anything. They don't really care at 3 months!

I'd look at all local gyms, even small ones for baby and mum classes or a crèche. My gym had a crèche, where they'd come and get you if you were needed, but otherwise I'd get an hour exercise, then take baby swimming, then they'd nap really heavily. It would be the morning gone, three times a week, with me getting exercise, baby getting stimulation, all good!

Running and cycling with a trailer aren't a good idea until about the baby is 9-12 months, depending on how cautious you are. A running stroller is good for walking offroad though, so long as it's not too bumpy.

Hiking is also a bit challenging with a little one because they have to be in front until about 6 months, which really affects your balance. We did it, but carefully. Watch your pelvic floor too!

The best thing we did was go to the Med for a fortnight in the winter, swim with the baby in a warm pool and walk everywhere. For adult company, I went to the breast feeding group where the focus was definitely mums, not babies. Most of us were pretty driven career mums who were desperate to talk about life before baby and what we were doing as adults. Baby swimming class was an exercise in endurance with everyone drastically trying to sort babies while all hell broke lose.

I just did stuff I liked doing but with DD, so wandering around museums and using the soft play areas in those, cafes for a bit of people watching I’d read a book to DD or just chat rubbish with her about what we were seeing, I’d take her to the family swim sessions, walks in nice parks on dry but cold days, kid friendly cinema slots, local shopping centre for a bit of browsing. It doesn’t really matter what you do or where you go as long as you’re interacting with DC while they’re awake and alert as much as possible.

Laughing at all those people who are saying 'when your baby sleeps' or 'it will knock them out for a good hour' not a chance for my 4 month old! She doesn't believe in sleep.

Therefore I've found i have to leave the house.

@Pluginss I get what you're saying about weather permitting, but have you got a decent raincover for your pram? And presumably if you were into hiking, you've got waterproof clothes?

I try out different routes in my local park, regardless of the rain. I know it well, so i dive into cafes, or the animal centre as suits me. I appreciate I'm lucky to have a big park nearby, but it would work with smaller ones

I've learnt that baby doesn't like the hood up on the bassinet, because she likes to see the sky, so ive adapted my canopy and turned it round so it goes flat and she can see through the plastic. She's also then fascinated by the rain drops on the cover.

You mentioned horse riding- any reason you can't take baby to see the horses? Even if you can't get out you can have a little part of it back.

Well, that's the 4 month sleep regression for you!

Hopefully it will improve for you soon, but at least a 4 month old is still hopefully happy in the sling or pram wherever you go.

Find a lonely older person (local charities, Age UK might be able to help). Pop round for a cuppa and a chat. Or see if any local care homes would be up for you popping in with the baby, there's tonnes of research about inter generational interaction being good for both elderly people and small children alike.

National Trust? You can do some lovely walks and looking round the properties/sites and then enjoy a hot drink in the cafe afterwards.

You have to go out & find the things yourself.

Nobody will come to you

Take baby with you

Volunteer - great opportunity to meet people & they will introduce you to other people & other things

Library - 1000s of free information

Allotment

Volunteer elderly, pet rescue

Help adults or children to read, art, exercise

Donning your best raincoat and a cover for your baby is the best thing. I also don't like being indoors, I have to get out and about.

While the baby's small it's way easier just to do whatever you want to do, no matter the weather. It gets harder when they're 6-9 months!

You can't regress if you never progressed 😅😅 she's never slept! But yes thankfully sling and pram are great

Swimming and long walks.

There’s no reason you can’t go out for hours with a baby if it’s wet. Just need the right gear. Maybe plan on the train trip once a week if finances allow just to get out somewhere new? It all gets much more fun once they’re more interactive but the potato stage can be hard going for sure.

Do things for you! For me I enjoyed really long pram walks in different locations with lots of tea stops. Also big shopping centres like Westfield White City where you can go in all weathers and it has lots of facilities including toy shops and plenty of retail therapy for you. Visiting friends and family is usually good as they’ll fuss over baby, you get to chat with another adult and have tea made for you.