I'm often confused by discussions around poverty, addiction, and crime because they seem to focus heavily on society and not much on individual responsibility

[YourWaryPlumBalonz]

For context, I'm autistic, grew up in a low-income household, and my dad was largely absent and neglectful. He rarely showed up, wasn't particularly involved, and wasn't much of a support. Despite that, I never got involved in crime or drugs.
Instead, I used the support that was available. I got help from charities, received government support related to my disability and employment, and eventually found a professional job. It wasn't easy, but there were people and organisations willing to help.
So what I'm struggling to understand is this: if support exists, why are so many problems framed primarily as society's fault rather than the responsibility of the individual?
I'm not saying circumstances don't matter. Clearly they do. But there seem to be plenty of people who experience poverty, disability, family breakdown, neglect, bullying, etc., and don't end up addicted, committing crimes, or repeatedly making self-destructive choices.

why are my threads inappropiate

There but for the grace of god go I.

I’m not religious but I’ve never found a more succinctly way of saying that if we are fortunate enough not to be touched by addiction or criminality then we should be grateful. We shouldn’t look at others and think that they are less worthy than us.

nobody needed to support me. i took what was offered and got a nice job in the end.

Some people are more susceptible to addiction than others. Often peoples first exposure to addictive substances is when they're young and not thinking it'll happen to them. In addition, alcohol is hugely normalised.

Your threads are irritating and boring and formulaic. And persistent. Please please stop.

No they didn't need to support you. YOU needed THEM.

This 👏

We're at the no punctuation or capital letters stage already.

Not long now until the 'I'm too busy to reply to everyone' post.

Because they're dumb! Sorry, I realise that sounds harsh but c'mon, don't you exist in the world at all??

You must know that most people your age don't have ££££ in the bank. You must know that people who are born into hard circumstances have harder lives.. etc etc. And if you don't know that, take this thread as an opportunity to listen and learn and stop asking the same thing over and over

Not every support scheme is accessible to all, exists in every area or even still exists. YTS was a scheme in the 80s for what would today be called NEETS- it’s no longer going.

Some people endure appalling abuse, grooming and being in care, come out the other side and manage to lead fulfilling lives. Many do not. Most people in chaotic circumstances have multiple generations of abuse, unemployment, low aspiration and harm dealt out to them at home. That’s a lot to overcome, before you even get in to the lack of decent jobs and opportunities in today’s economy.

I’m actually a bit of a “well just get on with it and try” kind of person. But it’s easy for me to say. I was never abused or mistreated.

👏👏👏well done OP! If you can do it everyone can. We can rid the world of the less fortunate if they follow your approach.

Because you’re full of it.

For context, I'm autistic, grew up in a low-income household, and my dad was largely absent and neglectful. He rarely showed up, wasn't particularly involved, and wasn't much of a support. Despite that, I never got involved in crime or drugs. Instead, I used the support that was available. I got help from charities, received government support related to my disability and employment, and eventually found a professional job. It wasn't easy, but there were people and organisations willing to help

For context, you grew up in a single parent family with not much money, but no abuse from a man clearly incapable of being a proper dad. You were lucky enough to benefit from every bit of assistance going and your loving mum has since given you more money than lots of people could ever dream of having to put towards their own home. So fucking shut up about how tough you had it. No, it probably wasn’t a fairy tale, but you weren’t some tragic Artful Dodger figure, living on your wits and having nobody give a shit about you. You know fuck all about what some kids have had to deal with.

they certainly helped

You seem to be implying that you endured terrible levels of hardship and that this is a reasonable standard by which to judge other people, and as @MyKindHiker points out you are seeing things through the lens of winner’s bias.

I used to volunteer for a charity that worked with children and young people at risk of exclusion from school because there is a very strong correlation between educational issues and involvement in crime. For every child who was struggling with behavioural issues, there were known reasons for those issues but not always ways to resolve them. For example social services are stretched to breaking point and the thresholds for intervention are horrifically high. Children have to be in appalling situations before they get any help, and those who end up in care generally have some of the worst outcomes. For every child who grows up to be a criminal, there will have been missed opportunities to help them. Lucky old you having services available - that’s not the case for everyone.

I have a master’s degree and a very good job. I am also a recovering addict (of many years now). I was a teenage runaway and lived in a squat with my drug dealer boyfriend. I have seen some awful things. I’m glad I didn’t end up in prison or worse. I consider myself to have been lucky, not morally superior.

I’m sorry if you found your childhood hard, but you don’t seem to be aware of the many different types of hardship that can exist.

I'm autistic too op but I can clearly see that everyone's circumstances are different and being autistic is not an excuse for lacking empathy or compassion before I even hit adulthood my life was blinded by sexual abuse,drug addiction mental health and an eating disorders back then there was no CAMHS (thought they aren't that much good these days,there was no methadone for 13 year olds.i was only given the help when I ended up In an EDU.

People who have traumatic childhoods end up having years upon years of intensive therapy as I did.im almost 20 years clean now op and have a full time time job,savings and a pension to pass to my DS when I'm no longer around.other than the years of intense therapy most done off my own back.

But there are people who ain't so fortunate,for example getting counselling in many areas can take a very long time,drugs is the only way to block that out,and let's be honest nobody is taking class A drugs to have a nice time on a weekend.

It's absolutely great you got help with your autism op and opportunities to get a job some never get those opportunities.

Rather than look at the differences look at the similarities and try to have some compassion and understanding.

You may have had the same disadvantages but you also had many privileges.

Disadvantage also comes much much worse than what youve experienced.

You didn't have a perfect start but you were by no means the worst.

You would be shocked at what some people have had to endure

Falling into crime and/or addiction result from a melting pot of different factors, some to do with the person and their physiology and psychology, some to do with the environment they are in.
In trying to prevent people going down these paths and supporting them to get on to better ones, we need to look at both person and environment.
Very few people believe that society alone is responsible for these problems. The view tends to be that some people are at higher risk anyway and society isn't working right for them.
It may seem as though people solely blame society, because if you go round saying what you've said here, then others will point out the societal contributors that you're overlooking.
Because your view that everyone just needs to 'take responsibility' doesn't actually achieve anything. If people can't or won't, what then? Shrug our shoulders and say not my problem? Except it is. Because addictions and crime effect us as a society, so its in society's interest to step in and understand it from all angles, in order to prevent it/support people out of it.
Complaining its not fair because you had a different make up and didn't take that path does nothing to help solve it.
At least those looking at the societal factors are trying.

Well duh!

You managed, so everyone else can too.
The world does not work like that.

OP at 27, I thought a bit like you, I didn’t have your savings or career(mentioned by pp about your previous thread) but I had your thoughts that everyone has the same choices, I put it down to lack of education on my part, experience and really shit/ isolated upbringing so maybe you’ve experienced similar to me. I’m more educated now and have more of an informed opinion.

Anyway, I came on to say that I now know better and I hope you can learn too.

look up inter generational trauma, epigenetics, personality traits/ temperment intelligence and neurodiversity, look up how all of these things relate to one another and affect your development, motivation, job prospects, engagement with the world etc

look into how abuse, neglect etc can affect children’s brain development and how that can affect people differently depending on epigenetics

look into sociology, social class, culture and how these things also relate to your development, motivation, job prospects, engagement with the world etc

Remember that you are privileged to have savings, to know how to save and not splurge, you learned that from somewhere whether you had the intelligence to learn it yourself or someone taught you. You have the intelligence, social skills and professionalism to hold down a professional job in your 20’s, you learned how to do that somehow, you were either socialised well somehow because it came naturally and you practiced and got better as you matured or you learned it from family, peers at school or extra curricular activities.

Perhaps if you weren’t taught these things then you are quite clever to learn them on your own, not everyone has that. Some people were bullied, were socially isolated, were extremely neurodivergent, had low IQ and maybe could not do what you did.

To be able to get through an interview panel with such issues can be impossible for some. For example, to be able to save with parents who steal your money is impossible. To be able to finish school when you’re bullied all the way through or have nowhere to do homework quietly is impossible.

Of course there are people who don’t bother and make bad choices but you just can’t judge this.

You got support from society though. If poverty is all down to the individual, with your logic you shouldn't have got any support.

The OP has clearly failed something hence all these bullshit threads

what did i fail

Many of those with a drug or alcohol problem I came across professionally, were suffering some kind of marked trauma. It’s a form of escape and self harm. You should feel lucky you have never had to experience some of what they did. To not care whether you live or die is as low as it gets. It’s nowhere near as simple as you narrate. Take away people’s safety, give them horrendous circumstances, add in no safety net, little love/care in some cases and add in then the environmental temptation, possibly MH or learning difficulties, wrong crowd, yet sense of belonging and zero hope… and then see how motivated some folk are to sing songs at a community centre or whatever else… put it this way if they’d been swapped at birth with more affluent children for many their lives would never have led down that road. Life chances: as Max Weber called it.