To consider myself mostly out of the trenches now the kids are 6 and 3?

[outhereover]

Life has definitely undergone a seismic shift in the last few months and it’s a lot easier.

Now if I could get rhe 3 yo to sleep past 6 am …

I’m 7 months in with first baby. I love him but my mind has been fantasising about when it gets “easier”. I want another but there is a voice in the back of my head that says but whyyyy when you’ll be on your way to having a more functioning human and getting some sort of life back by then
Good to hear 3 sounds like a turning point. I think I can make it to 3

@Orangelover I found three really tough with my eldest, I wish people had warned me about it! But I absolutely loved two as an age yet people had warned so much around the terrible twos. That’s not to put you off, just to say it’s not linear and not everyone will have the same experience. I have really beaten myself up at times for finding some ages hard that others have said are easier. Fortunately having a second made me realise it’s all down to the child not the age or ability of parenting.

Yes out of the trenches.
It’s a long war though, as posters have alluded to. I lost several battles and I think poor DS came out the worst for it. Some of the most stressful days are the aftermath in the teen years.
Everyone says it but it goes fast. If ever was there a case for mindfulness, it’s the 12 years of childhood.

I love the teenage years but maybe we’ve been lucky!

Ds was

0-18 months - utterly adorable but ruined by the fact he didn’t sleep
18 months - 2.5 - slept but completely and utterly fucking mental, hellbent on killing himself and others. I used to see other people doing nice things with their toddlers. I could not!
2.5 - 3.5 ATTITUDE. Rude, mean, jealous (new sibling) angry.
3.5 - 4 - starting to be nice
4 onwards lovely little boy

dd

0-1 - delightful
1-2 - delightful but didn’t sleep
2-3 slept but eating was an issue, from two and a half onwards prone to being argumentative and stubborn
3 onwards delightful but wish she’d sleep later

so can’t complain

Buckle up 😆

Enjoy !!
you’ve got a rollercoaster ahead !!!
friendships
puberty
teenage romances / breakups
exams
then there is parties with drink / drugs / etc
driving
first holidays away without you …
the worry and stress as they grow up is brutal !!!!

Mine are 16 and 13 and it’s definitely so much easier than ten years ago! Yes the problems are bigger and I don’t have all the answers like I used to BUT I get a full night of sleep every night, we can leave them home alone for a few hours, they are good entertaining company. I found the little kid years really really hard going and way prefer life now. Don’t listen to the naysayers!

Yay, you’ve arrived! I found that age 3 was a milestone too. They are toilet trained, can eat independently, and climb into the car seat unaided, no more day naps, no more pram etc.

My youngest is 2 years 4 months and I can already feel it getting easier. Just the potty training hurdle to go, and then I am officially nappy-free for the rest of my life!! Wooo!!

The trenches are definitely much shallower past three than in the baby years. The primary age years are usually the most plain sailing. Teen years can go either way. For me, the teen years have been far and away the worst. They do sleep in in the mornings (although not at night, and most of their worst problems seem to need to be dealt with between the hours of 11pm and 1am).

@Tickingcrocodile Mine are still young but I can’t help but think this must be the worst irony…. Before kids 11pm - 1am would have been no issue. Kids have turned me into a morning person. So I will now not take fondly to being kept awake past 11 (posted at this time due to a rare child free night haha!)

@CaffeinatedMum Yes, most unfortunate that the teen years often coincide with the peri/menopausal years and the need for an early night.....

I think it’s just a different kind of hard.

I’ve got one just turning 18 and one who is 12, nearly 13.

I was going to say 18 is when you get out of the trenches 😂 But in seriousness, for me there was a big change at age 6, that the one I really remember. Don’t remember 3 feeling that much easier than the baby stages if I’m honest!