Order of our names changed on joint bank account

[Maresmaid]

Many years ago my husband and I opened 2 joint bank accounts. One was set up in joint names with his name first and the other in joint names with my name first so that we could easily identify which account was which. The account with his name first received our salaries and transferred a regular amount to the account with my name first which then paid out all the various household dd’s. I recently needed to set up a new standing order to the account with my name first and discovered that the names have been switched round by the bank without our knowledge so both accounts now show my husbands name first.

I am fully aware that this makes no difference to my legal claim to the money in the account and it’s just really an admin issue, but it’s made me feel like making a fuss and insisting they change it back. I deal with the family finances, I use the mobile and banking app, when something needs paying husband asks me to log on and do it, so technically I am the primary user and i feel like making a stand about the sexism of automatically showing husbands name before wife’s.

Am I being unreasonable if I complain to the bank?

Not when it means I cannot manage my own accounts without my husbands permission.

It's a huge problem. And extremely sexist

Saying this ordering is "nothing to do with misogyny" is a bit on the optimistic side.

Just saying.

Call again and say you want to close the account and move banks because of this. Watch them sort it out in ten seconds flat. But also change accounts anyway. They don’t deserve our business.

Colleague who is atheist always talks about Christian names (we work in data so it happens a lot). I (a Christian) cringe at this and make some facetious comment like “maybe his FIRST name is Mohammed”.

That is not what is happening to OP though is it

They switched which means they can switch it back. If they wont, clearly tell them why and close both accounts. Open new ones like you want. Tell new bank why and if they do same thing, you will close new ones too.

I didn’t change my name when we got married although I did have a note attached to my bank account saying that they should accept cheques made out to my married name because elderly relatives couldn’t cope. This was fine for nearly 10 years then the bank arbitrarily changed my name on the account to my married name! When I complained, they insisted I had to bring in my marriage certificate to (somehow) prove that I hadn’t changed my name. WTF. This was 20 years ago and I still feel cross about it (and still use my maiden name; easier these days as nobody writes cheques!)

Despite always being the first name on forms etc Halifax always defaulted to OH name first, they said it was because it was alphabetical. I got sick of arguing and left them.

Nationwide have me listed first as it should be because I added OH to my existing account so kudos to them.

When my daughter and SIL were sorting out their mortgage, she did all the work on it and was the main contact. Despite this ALL correspondence was addressed to him and him only. It made her so angry

Not in our case, which is a joint account with Santander. I am the main account holder and dh is the second one. If he phones up, they ask to speak to me to allow them permission to speak to him, or at least they did last time he phoned a year or so ago. My name is also first on the statement and any correspondence and I am not the elder or higher earner.

But it IS happening to me. With Santander.

Most places I've come across automatically put dh first. Its purely done because he is a man with the title MR. If it was alphabetical, age or who set it up i would be first.
It pisses me off as I set up the mortgage, electric, gas, council tax, basically everything and I input my name first. With him as a second person on account.
Without fail all correspondence posted out to us changes to him being the first person on the account.

But that’s not true is it … if you’re name is on the bank account you can manage it without his permission, it’s a joint account regardless of whose name is first!

I earn twice what DH does and his name was put first: even though it was my original bank account from childhood he was added to. I was raging. I assumed sexism, but really, I think it was down alphabetically when TSB upgraded their systems

This sort of shit gives me the rage.
I'd complain till they changed it or leave.

this gave me a wry smile

I had a bank account with my dad, it was my bank account first and I added his name. My name was before his in the alphabet - both first and last names

they did this to my bank account, suddenly took it upon themselves to put his name first. Dad went to the bank and created merry hell - so they swapped back

then he went into the bank to move money from his account to my daughters account - now I had a solo account with the same bank, where do you think they took the money from? yes that is right my solo account and not his account. It was £1000

then I took his name off the account just before covid - not related, and sadly he died (not from covid) but unexpected.

I then 3 years later had to order a cheque book, due to it being the only way I could pay for something as the wouldn't accept credit card, debit or bank transfer

the bank sent the cheque book out

name on cheque Mr my dads initial his last name...

I wrote the cheque and the money was taken and paid by the bank....

I always set up accounts with Ms M P Name and then I receive post to Ms My Private Name. It is so annoying. I don’t want everybody that handles my post seeing my full legal name. I would complain, honestly, but I have a high tolerance for painstaking nitpicking, so that’s just how I roll.

If I log onto our joint account using my login it says "my name & his name". If we log on using his login it says "his name & my name".

That’s a shame for you, but it’s not happening to the Op who the thread is about

I had a building society account for many years in my name. Married dh, and added him...they put him first on the account despite the history and the fact that my name is alphabetically before his and I'm a year older. Building society later floated on the stock market and sent the demulualisation shares to him! 😡
I hear you OP.

Over 20 years ago when I married DH, I added him to my Barclays account… however it immediately became styled as
Mr XYZ Poop and Mrs ABC Poop!
I had that account for many years as a single woman!
However, when he passed away, I was called into the bank within a few days of his death, to have him rapidly removed from the account!😮

@JackieMac77

Eerily similar stories!

Tell that to Santander - I can't manage the account or deal with the associated insurance package any more. Wankers.

This happened to me years ago when my then boyfriend moved in with me to the flat I owned alone, and I added him on to the council tax that at the time was paid from my individual bank account, and the bill came through the door with his name first. I was furious.

I never knew that!