To ask what is wrong with me and how do I NOT do this?!

[Tueooo]

39 and my whole life I have been scared of progressing anything with men who are truly into me and treat me well.

Men who are clear about their feelings, feel safe and warm, I just go off them after a few dates. As a result I’ve ended up with truly awful men, one left me 6 months pregnant, another forced me to have an abortion, another threatened to throw me down the stairs and hit me.

I’ve never found it difficult to meet men and dating doesn’t faze me at all. I’ve met someone quite by chance and he’s great, I can tell he cares about me even after a few dates, there’s no pressure to do anything and he’s always interested in my day etc.

I don’t want to ruin this and hide from it. But as we are a few weeks in I can feel myself looking for issues and coming up with things in my mind that might be too cringy or awkward (yes I am aware how incredibly immature this is). Even down to his car!!! I’m analysing that and thinking it will be awkward because it’s so small so I can’t get in it with him… just crazy stuff like this.

I know it’s likely come from childhood and whatever attachment I have but I just want to stop it. How?!

She says 'it is so small so I can't get in it with him'. She is either very shallow or extremely large.

What’s wrong with a Ford Fiesta? I don’t get it.

Nothing attractive about a man driving a big penis extension either.

Thank you @Lhori sorry about my rubbish reading comprehension this morning!

But there is an underlying reason why you are attracted to this type of man, usually anyway. But I’m not a professional.

Yep i am sure there is a reason. It will be my dad. But knowing the reason behind the attraction doesn’t stop attraction. My knowing the reason stops me following up on my attraction but it doesn’t stop it in the first place.

It is quite ambiguous.

I had to check the fiesta. It's not the most rock n roll thing on earth but it's a four door car? It's not like it's one from the 80s is it? So it's not the size, it's that it's kinda unsexy, right?

But just forget you know about the car. Lots of incredibly cool people, shock horror, don't even own a car! They use Uber and the tube. The horror!

I saw a couple of guys in a micro city car the other day, it genuinely only fitted two people. No boot really. I thought it was cool, and modern looking!