To think people should be banned from taking someone with them to medical appointments unless they need assistance (and then just one person)

[CurdinHenry]

Sick of standing waiting for appointments while one girl sits on her arse with her five boon companions in the waiting room because people can't do anything by themselves.

Apologies if someone else has said this- regarding meals in the coffee shop: our main hospital actively encourages the use of public transport, which runs every hour. I've just missed the bus several times and that, coupled with the nearness of lunchtime and my rumbling stomach, has meant I need to eat ... or faint, especially if I've had an appt which needed me to be empty.
That and the fact that the coffee shop is run by the Friends of that hospital so patients, in and out, benefit.
And I have even eaten there as a supporter (boon??) for a friend or relative.
Please forgive me.
Seriously, none of us know the others circumstances and shouldn't make assumptions.
FIVE boons does seem excessive though and I'd definitely stand for someone less able and have. Maybe that cancels out my use of the coffee shop ... 🤔 😅

@Hedgerowmanageri work full time. I get 10 days a year special leave for things like dependants hospital appointments that’s before you consider annual leave. If DS or DH is having surgery I would be off sick with anxiety/stress no way would I be fit to work that day it wouldn’t be safe for me to be in!

it wouldn’t be safe for me to be in!

I mean, I know everyone is different, but my 5 year old son had a routine surgery and it certainly didn’t render me unsafe to function.

@Vivi0I work in a profession that prompts taking time off if you’re worried/distracted/stressed. Sure I could put on a brave face to power through but actually in that the best action no it’s not. My subconscious distraction is going to lead to more mistakes and if you think about the Swiss cheese model that hole could be the one that fails to stop a critical event as your taking away a layer of protection. That’s why things like special leave and sick leave exist not just for physical issues.

You're not wrong OP. We are regular a and e attendees as dc has bad asthma. Every time we have been waiting to be seen we see whole families there. Treating it like it's a fun day out. The children are running around and then the adults swarm the sandwich trolley like flies to shit.
They are usually the ones to keep pestering the doctors and nurses and complaining about the wait time.

Last time, whilst with our dc with steroid nebulisers, I overheard one nurse tell a dad, who had done the above with his entire family, that they're dealing with the very sick children first in a very huffy manner, as it was quite clear the child/ren were not urgent.

Good for you.

Yep.

Ultimately, the longer patients are in hospital for appointments/A and E, the greater the need for support and the less likely it is that one person is going to be able to provide all of it for potentially an open ended period of many hours.

People don't have to like that, but there's no getting round it.

"Constantly"? What about metrics. How many patients take more than one adult with them for planned appointments?

Because if you are going to ban patients from taking companions then you need to

a) show its a genuine problem not just MNers tutting
b) look at what else can be done about the problem.

Most of the issues claimed as problems here (lack of seats for example) could be better addressed by clinics running closer to times and faster triage/better comms in A&E before you bar patients from taking support with them.

Anecdata from mates in the pub or even your own eyes isn't fact based - its entirely subjective. I've also seen it claimed here that "some communities" take the family with them but the PP seems unable to name the communities so I'm assuming that isn't fact based either.

I attended with my parents in their 80s and learned of my father’s terminal cancer diagnosis. Is that ok?

Constantly means every day, every single day.

I wonder why you are so intent on dismissing what people see with their own eyes.

Lol, then you’re deliberately obtuse because X-rays certainly exist outside hospitals and If you had a brain and knew how to Google basic shit, you’d know that. 💀 But sure, keep insisting your own personal experience is somehow universal. And since apparently only “serious” problems justify going to a hospital without it being a fun little day out, I hope you never have to go back for any of your own “not very serious” problems. Deal with it. 😂

And what are you, fucking 80 years old? 💀 means “I’m dead,” as in something is so stupid or ridiculous that it killed you. It’s incredibly common internet slang. I genuinely didn’t think I’d have to provide an emoji tutorial too. 💀💀💀

“And I also didn’t realise just how many people there were with fuck all else to do on any given weekday”

Like you posting on Mumsnet and giving out to the poster from the US? 😉

Again not a metric. You can't solve a problem unless you understand it.

Do you know the actual number of patients arriving to outpatients with more than one adult? Have you asked them why and captured those reasons? If not then you don't actually know if you have a problem rather than a perception.

Banning patient support is simply "doing something" in response to "something must be done" without first checking something needs doing or that your proposed solution will not cause more problems than it solves. I've seen a lot of people complaining about companions with little evidence that its causing an actual problem in most cases.

Men not standing up for pregnant women is not solved by telling women "don't bring anyone" instead of telling them to bring partners. It might well be solved by men being told to get off their arses, running clinics closer to time and building confidence and trust in patients.

Even in A&E better comms and triage (where its been tried) helps with waiting room management and reduces the need for extra people.

I don’t imagine posting on Mumsnet from my phone is anywhere near the same time you need to allocate to going all the way to a hospital, for someone else’s appointment, and then hanging out in the hospital cafeteria afterwards.

Sure, I have some spare time during the day, I don’t have that much spare time 😂

One person is fine but a whole family, no!

Indeed, good for @worriedwife201 that she gets this time off paid. But good for @the rest of us too that since 1999 we have unlimited - albeit unpaid - time off to deal with emergencies iro dependants!

I frequently go to an outpatient clinic where it is definitely a problem. I wouldn't mind if the people went into the appointment with the patient but they don't. There are plenty of seats outside for them to sit but it doesn't seem to occur to some people that it's not a family day out or that they are preventing patients from sitting.

If I need an x-ray, I get told where to go, it’s really that simple 😊

Sure, Minor Injuries Units offer x-rays for, well, minor injuries. I’m not sure what the relevance of any of this is, though 🤷‍♀️ I couldn’t give less of a fuck about where I can or can’t get an x-ray 😬

And no, I’m not like fucking 80 years old 😂 I know what 💀 means. Just not used to seeing it in this context:

It’s genuinely incredible that after repeatedly judging complete strangers based on circumstances you know nothing about, you’ve now managed to demonstrate exactly why that logic is so fucking stupid using yourself as the example

Maybe I’m missing something? Your sentence really isn’t giving deceased.

Looking forward to your reply telling me how fucking stoopid you think I am 😂 (again)

Because unless posters are in all A&Es all of the time, it remains just that - random observations by random posters - and not data

I don't think people attending is the problem really, there will be all kinds of reasons to want someone with you. Bringing the whole family is obviously OTT, I've only seen this in A&E where sometimes it will be a bizarre family outing.

The problem is the lack of consideration by anyone coming along. If a department is full the visitors should be standing up to allow patients to sit. In my A&E thankfully receptionists are quite firm about this.

But the point was never that you personally aren’t told where to go for an X-ray. The point was that you repeatedly judged complete strangers based entirely on your own circumstances, then immediately demonstrated exactly why that logic is so fucking stupid when it turned out other people can, in fact, have completely different circumstances from yours. And “I couldn’t give less of a fuck about where I can or can’t get an X-ray” is a particularly funny retreat considering you were the one who brought up your own experience of getting X-rays as evidence in the first place. If it’s suddenly irrelevant, congratulations, you’ve finally stumbled onto the point.

And now we’ve apparently moved on to forensic analysis of 💀 because you’ve run out of anything remotely relevant to argue about. If I’d used 😭, would you assume I was genuinely sitting here sobbing? Emojis aren’t literal stage directions. I used 💀 because I found the irony of you accidentally proving my point while arguing against it funny. This really shouldn’t require an interpretive seminar.

And lol, you’re the one who just spelled stupid “stoopid.” I genuinely don’t need to keep telling you how stupid you sound when you’re apparently determined to do all the work for me. Seriously, sit down. You’re embarrassing yourself. 💀

How would that work for appointments like Diabeties eye tests where the person taking the test isn't allowed to drive?

Going to the cafeteria is fine, that's what I never understood, why can't mum and dad take the child into their appointment while granny takes the other kids for a hot chocolate? Why do all 5 or more of them need to be in the waiting room?

so fucking stupid

There it is! 😂😂

Anyway, I would love to respond to this, but if I’m being honest, it’s not the most coherent thing I’ve read in my life.

Seriously, sit down. You’re embarrassing yourself.

I seem to recall you had a post deleted last night for calling me a “fucking bitch”, amongst other things, so you can get in the bin 🗑️

Bye 👋

It really depends on what sort of appointment it is and if it is a serious one, or something routine - how would you know which one it was for if you were just an onlooker?

Two of us went to my dads appointments to get diagnosed, but he was clearly dying and I wanted to support him and be the one who gave the difficult newsto my family and get all of the information. I really couldn't have given a fuck if anyone thought it was out of order, maybe they were the same?