I live in London with my partner and we’re renting a flat. We’re going away for about 3 weeks in November. My sister has been living abroad for the last few years doing seasonal work and travelling. This summer she happened to be working somewhere much closer to the UK and it was looking like she was finally going to stop the seasonal work and move back to the UK.
Her plan is to move to London for a few reasons, including pursuing a business/career opportunities has, being closer to friends, just wanting to live in the city and having better job opportunities while she gets herself established. She’s nearly 30 and the plan was for her to spend October living with our parents just outside London, use that as a base to get everything sorted, see friends etc, and find a room in London to move into around the beginning of November. She definitely can't afford her own flat, so it would be a room in a house/flat share.
She’s now asked if she can stay in our flat while we’re away. It actually makes perfect sense for her. She’d have somewhere of her own for a few weeks, wouldn’t have to travel in from our parents' house for viewings, and it gives her a bit more time to find somewhere rather than rushing into a room. She’s said she’ll cover the bills and even offered to pay me some rent. I don't need the money though. Without her in the picture, we'd just be paying the rent as normal and it was never an issue. I also know that if I charged her what we're paying, it would eat into a fairly big chunk of the savings she needs to live off while she gets established.
The thing is… I feel weird about it. There’s no dramatic reason. She’s not a drug addict, she’s not going to trash the place, and I’m not worried she’d deliberately do anything. She is fairly clumsy, but if she broke something she'd be absolutely mortified and would do her best to replace it. We’re not estranged or anything, but we aren't particularly close either. My partner says he genuinely doesn't mind and is staying out of it, so it’s basically down to me.
Part of me thinks this is such an easy thing to do for my sister and I'd be a bit of a cow to say no. We’ll literally be away anyway, and it would help her out enormously. But another part of me just really doesn't want to. I don't particularly like the idea of someone living in our flat while we're away, even if it is my sister, and I can't quite explain why. I also suspect she'd be quite hurt and possibly resentful if I said no, which makes me feel even worse about saying no.
So AIBU?
YANBU, it’s your flat and you don’t need to justify not wanting her there?* *
YABU, she’s your sister and this is a pretty easy favour to do, you’re a cow to say no ?