AIBU to expect a dog-free area in a restaurant?

[Diorling]

Hi,

I recently met up with my family for lunch at Bills at Clark’s Village in Somerset. It’s not an area I know, but looked to be good for a meet up. it was a lovely sunny warm day and folks were out enjoying their shopping. It was a great atmosphere.

It was pretty empty in Bills as we were early. The waiters were lovely and showed us to a table, and we were busy looking through the menu when I smelt a fairly unpleasant smell. I looked up, and a family were being sat at the next table. The smell was coming from their dog, which was being sat right next to me, rather than on the other side where there was an empty table. It wasn’t a dog that sat nicely on the floor and went to sleep either - it kept on trying to move towards me and the family.

Now I like dogs, grew up with them, and have had my own, but one of the children was attacked at the park by a random one once ( it ran up to him), and he is now terrified by dogs. The dog kept edging towards him, and he kept trying to shrink away along the long bench seat as far as he could. Not only that, but frankly the smell was appalling.

i spoke quietly to the waiter, explained the issue, and he moved us to another table in the opposite corner. It’s a large restaurant, so problem sorted. Except it wasn’t. Within 5 minutes they had shown another family to the table next to us - despite most of the spaces still being empty. They too had a dog, but this time it was lifted onto the seat (and later laps of the family). Again it was right next to us. Whilst I love dogs I don’t expect to have their nose by my elbow and frankly don’t think it’s very hygienic.

I complained to the restaurant but they explained they were dog friendly, and even had a dog menu (‘Bone Appetit’).

Now that’s fine - if I had known it. But as I pointed out, there were no signs anywhere to that effect, nothing on entering - and apparently no dog free area for those who prefer not to eat near dogs. Obviously we won’t go there again (a pity, as staff are lovely and the food was good - if you have dogs, and are round there, it’s a great place to go.)

But for the rest of us, I just don’t like dogs around when I eat out - and if they have to be there, then surely their place is sleeping quietly on the floor?

AIBU?

It’s literally on the front of their website for the Bills OP is taking about. This is a business and they took a revenue based decision to allow dogs.

“The entitled breed” are those who expect a business to make a decision that is counterproductive to their revenue goals. They took a business decision to allow dogs, so dog owners use them. Who exactly is being entitled here?

The entitled breed are dog owners who put their dogs on tables, allow them on seats and don't control them.

Most dog owners I know are not like that.

I think if there is space cafes should have separate spaces for both, and have a sign on the door saying something like "we welcome well behaved dogs. Please keep your dog on the floor. If you cannot control your dog we will ask you to leave"

Clark’s Village is a very dog friendly place and the restaurant you mention has a dog menu, so in this specific case I think YABU. Restaurants in general though YANBU. I don’t expect to bring my dogs inside to eat anywhere and I’m quite happy to sit outside with them if we need to stop for food

But they have only had to do that because of the behaviour of dog owners. It’s become an “if you can’t beat them join them” situation. If dog people were just normal about their pets then it would never have needed to be opened up for discussion. But now every new business is flooded with Facebook comments “do you allow dogs” and they get put under pressure to say okay fine.

This old chestnut…
You can leave a dog at home on its own, you can’t leave children

I agree with badly behaved dogs not belonging in public places but we both know that these are down to the owners. However, not the point of this thread or my post. It was referring to people who expect dog free places when a private company has decided that dog friendly is better for business.

So tiresome isn’t it, particularly on a parenting forum! Children are little people who need to learn how to exist in the world.

No. They are making a business decision. If being dog friendly negatively impacts revenue believe me they would ban them from their business.

Why is it entitled to take a dog to a dog friendly restaurant? Entitled would be where they demanded to take a dog to restaurant which wasn't dog friendly.

Because dog people have become some pushy and weird about their animals. Businesses were fine without letting dogs in for decades. People have got weird about their dogs and decided to make it everyone else’s problem.

There's all sorts of permitted things that are still really daft or even dangerous. These aren't all well thought out decisions.

Our tiny local supermarket cafe now allows dogs and it can be really awkward trying to get to a table with a drink while avoiding stepping on rover. I don't think I'd even apologize if I did because it's such an obviously stupid place for a dog.

Seriously, you are so commercially naive. No business would do something that goes against their profit margins. It's money. Nothing else.

Of course it is profit driven. However, I agree that many businesses feel that they have been pushed into it.

You’re deliberately missing my point. I’m not saying that businesses aren’t making a choice that they view as good for business. I’m saying they have been backed into a corner and forced into doing this by how weird people have become about their dogs. People expect it now and put pressure on businesses to allow dogs in. Because, as I said upthread, dog people are generally a pushy and bullish kind of person.

If dog people could be normal about their dogs then people wouldn’t feel like they had to let dogs in. It doesn’t mean that people don’t mind - it means that the sort of person who minds is generally less confrontational than your average dog owner who in my experience is extremely so.

OK. 🤣 Don't ever start a business.

Some people feel they have to take their dogs everywhere. It’s ridiculous. I was in a pub recently, enjoying a nice meal and a dog peed all over the floor in front of our table. The owner thought it was quite amusing.
We went to the shopping centre in Battersea Power station and there was dog poo outside an upmarket shop.
There is something seriously wrong with dog owners who think their dogs enjoy shopping…

I’m a dog lover and until recently a dog owner and completely agree with you. As with many things, people being inconsiderate means we can’t have nice things. Yesterday I was at an outside ice cream parlour and while my child scoffed their ice cream I felt aware of someone stood very close behind me. Turned around and noticed a flexi lead, looked down and his dog was taking a piss against the pole of the seating area barrier about 20 cms from my feet. “Don’t worry he’s not weeing on your shoes I wouldn’t let him” THANKS MATE.

And the kennel cough vaccine is a live vaccine so dogs are a risk to anyone having cancer treatment or immunosuppressed for a few weeks after the vaccine.

I'm not bothered by dogs one way or the other but I agree it should be possible to eat a meal without a dog being next to you. A lady I know gets an allergic reaction from sitting on chairs where a dog has been, or from people with dogs' clothes. It should be possible to go through life without constantly coming into contact with dogs.

The new smoking is bang on!

And people get so angry about not being allowed their dogs everywhere, just like smoking!

We were meeting up from opposite ends of the country and we wanted somewhere mid location to meet. I did a google search and Street ( Clark’s Village) seemed to fit the bill. I checked the website for the shops. There was a list of eateries, and one was Bills. We all have Bills near our various towns and villages where we live, and none of us have ever had an issue with dogs in our various branches, so it wasn’t obvious at all. It just never occurred to us.

It was only after we had ordered that the issue became clear. Even then we would have been ok if the two dogs had just lain quietly under the tables. But they didn’t. The first dog repeatedly kept trying to move towards us and kept being pulled back on its lead. Frankly the owner didn’t have much control.. Had they moved it to the other side of the table - where it was empty and there was plenty of space - it would have been better, or if it had just settled down. But it didn’t.

The waiter moved us - but showed the next folk - with a dog - to the table next to us. There were still many many empty tables at that point. The waiter knew we had moved because of being scared of dogs. So why move a family with a dog next to us? At no point did he mention they were dog friendly or indeed that there was a dog free area.

The second dog was lifted up on the chair - again next to me and again the other tables on the other side were all empty.

It wasn’t until I went to pay the bill and mentioned how difficult it had been for us that they explained they were dog friendly, and showed me the dog menu. It was never mentioned at all prior to that. According to posts here there should have been a dog free section - but when I suggested this to the cashier then at no point did they say ‘ we have a dog free section there’.

I agree it would be great if we could solve this one. We have tried your suggestions. We’ve tried to introduce older and calmer dogs, even a tiny puppy, but he flatly refused to go anywhere near ( and it was the tiniest, sweetest , cutest fluffiest puppy you have ever seen, lying in our hand so not even running around. ). We’ve even considered introducing a friends dog for a while. He loves cats, so it’s not an animal thing. It’s a tough nut to crack.

In the particular situation I was in, we were desperate as late at night and the area had limited choices so we didn't look at the website.

Dog owners asking if a newly opened place is dog friendly is just asking for information. It is not pressuring them to accept dogs.
A cafe opened in my town a few weeks ago an yes, people were asking if dogs are allowed. They were also asked about opening hours, gluten free options, vegan options.
People ask because they don't want to turn up with their dog and find they can't go in.