AIBU to be surprised no one checked my 17yo had permission when travelling abroad without a parent?

[TeenageTravels]

We are British. My 17yo recently travelled abroad to an EU country for a holiday with another family (who live in the UK but are originally from the country they were travelling to). I sent her with a permission letter and provided my and DH's contact details and passport details and a copy of her birth certificate. She wasn't asked for any of this either in the UK or the other country, or any information about who she was travelling with or why. AIBU to be surprised by this? Obviously my daughter was completely safe but is this not a concern for trafficking or other reasons?

Portugal is pretty strict on this. DC travelled there a couple of years back and the letter I had written with passport details etc was thoroughly checked. I just got the template from the govt website.

I have a child with type one diabetes and we were advised to always travel with consultant letter and proof of prescription. It has never been asked for but not worth taking the risk of not having it just in case.

Ds regularly travelled on his own from the age of 15. The only difference with an adult travelling is that budget airlines wouldn't accept him on his own until he turned 16, so he had to go with one of the main carriers. No one ever asked him for anything.

Mine was checked when she was 17 coming back INTO the UK... now that seemed particularly odd as they'd let her leave without any checks. I got a call from border security as I was on the way to the airport to meet her.

I took 10 16 year olds away a few years ago (friends of my son), they all had the letter in case, but only one got asked, no idea why given they were a clear group. He showed them, they asked me a few questions and that was it.

Before that trip though the letter thing had never occurred to me, my parents have taken my kids away before and my name is different to my kids and I have never been asked either - lucky I suppose.

We brought dd15 friend on holiday and nobody checked anything.

I went abroad, lived alone, rented a house and had a baby at 17 so no, I'm not surprised! We also took my daughters friend abroad when she was 8 and again at 15 with no issues.

A few years ago, i took a 10 year old & 12 year old on a day trip to France - friends of my kids.

I didn't get asked for the letters their parents had written.

They don’t automatically check everyone. There are lots of blended families with different surnames is it’s not immediately a red flag. I’ve flown 5/6 times alone with my DC who have a different surname to me. I’ve only been asked once to prove that they’re my DC and I’ve never been asked to prove permission from my DH to take them out of the country. Interestingly the one time I was asked was at arrival at Heathrow and not when leaving.

When did this rule come in? I remember at 17 Ds and a group of his friends went with the father of one of them to their family villa in Spain. I certainly didn’t provide any letter and I’d have been surprised if any of his friends’ parents had done this. I’m pretty sure some of his school friends had been abroad with no parents too.

They do sometimes check it. My kids travel quite regularly abroad to see grandparents and family friends on their own. They have all been checked up several ages, including late teens.

At 17 I'm assuming she has an adult passport so why would they check she had permission to leave without her parents?

I'm surprised how many people seem to think it's fine just because they've never been asked. The guidelines are clear that kids travelling without both parents should have written permission from the other parent. My step daughter has had a letter from her mum every time she's been with us and DH has sent her a letter every time she's gone away with her mum... As far as I know it hasn't been checked but imagine you didn't have one the one time you were picked for a check and the whole holiday was cancelled!!! At 17 I would have expected them to be ok on an adult passport but I also would have actually confirmed this before travelling rather than hoping for the best like so many people apparently have done!

Portugal check
My DD flew alone at 16 to see family and her documentation was checked
A couple of years ago we saw two groups refused admission as they didnt have the paperwork. Tbf the staff were helping the groups contact the relevant adults to check rather than shipping the people back home, but they were not just letting them through

Guidelines are not laws.

I didn't get my 17yo a new passport when she turned 17 as she still has years left on her current one 🤷

Nor me. In fact i got a child one for DD at 15.5. Chwaper and she was responsible for her own when it expired

A 10 year 'adult' passport doesn't actually mean she's an adult. It's just to do with how much your appearance is expected to change in 10 years. Children are still legally children until their 18th birthday regardless of what passport they have. Just as if an 18yo was still on a 5 year passport that wouldn't mean they were treated as a child.

Funnily enough they have thought of that and the letter has to be certified by a notary or solicitor.

DS 17 went to Greece and Portugal this year. Greece needed nothing. Portugal we got complacent and he was stopped at passport control. . We then had to email though all the details and scans of our passports and details of who he was with etc before they would let him in. Didn't take long but it was lucky we were in the house when he messaged ,

My DD travelled alone to South Africa at 17. No one questioned her or asked anything.

Maybe they have extra security staff or people watching CCTV?

I think it depends on the country you fly from. My nearest airport is in Switzerland and I have to produce a letter everytime I fly with the kids.

The first time I was stopped was more than 10 years ago, I didn't have a letter as it was the first time I had flown alone with the children and they wouldn't even let me check in. My husband (and father of my children) was standing next to me at the check as even though he wasn't flying, he was helping to carry bags / children, but they wouldn't even accept that until he went back to the car to get his driving licence to prove he was who he said he was!!

I was stopped again last year, I had a letter from my now ex-husband but I didn't have a photocopy of his passport so they said it was invalid. My son had to call his dad and ask him to whatsapp a photo of his passport 🙄 before they would even let us check in (we had bags so even though we had checked in online they still insisted on seeing travel docs at the airport). I feel it is also necessary to point out that my son was 15 and much taller and wider than me and was clearly not being removed from the country against his wishes.

He has travelled often with his father too. His father has never once been asked to prove he has my permission. Obviously, I'm not bitter at all 🤔

By 17 I was holidaying abroad with friends. It never occurred to me that I might need parental permission.

I'm surprised to hear that a letter is accepted as proof especially as its something so easy to fake/forge.

For over 16s a passport and return ticket should suffice in order to travel anywhere and with anyone.

Interestingly in Scotland you don't. Essentially you sign up to pay. We are in the process of changing the paperwork.