Anyone else's kids got extremely expensive hobbies?

[bjorni9]

What started as a casual club, has turned into a lifestyle. Mountain biking, 4x, bmx freestyle, bmx racing. It has saved my ND child's sanity, and drained my bank account. I buy and sell and work so much overtime just so we can continue. It is far better than any play therapy or council funded clubs we've ever received (especially for his mh and mood). Anyone else making big sacrifices for their kids' hobbies? If only football would've stuck!

Yep, horses. Eventing here, so three disciplines to fork out for!

I wasn't expecting athletics to require so many different types of shoes to be honest. Sprint spikes, long distance spikes, jumping spikes, throwing shoes, normal trainers. Not a huge outlay compared to lots here, but trying to replace them all after a growth spurt takes time to track (boom boom!) Them all down.

Unfortunately any kind of extra curricular thing costs so much these days, just to attend. And if there’s equipment or competitions or travel involved it’s almost prohibitive. Both mine do 2 activities after school, just at base-level and I find the fees hard to keep up with. I’d love to offer them more opportunities but sadly it’s not on the cards.

Pokémon TCG
Piano lessons
Guitar lessons

Ballet and Performing Arts many years ago. I've recently seen the price of leotards and pointe shoes thank goodness, they've skyrocketed in price

Music, piano, flute, saxophone, bari sax and clarinet. So expensive

I stumbled down an Insta rabbit hole of children equestrians. Two of them seem to have multiple (5+) ponies each and aren’t even in their teens. I assume this will be £100k+ per annum for everything?

I find it a bit like standing on Bond St looking into the designer shops and just going “Wow…”

Horses. Some at home and some at livery. Younger DCs started riding as soon as they could walk and 2 still ride as adults. We keep the outgrown or retired horses. They are family members. I refuse to add up the costs though they are north of 3 or 4k a month. Costs are irrelevant as we would do it anyway and, now that they are adults, DCs contribute.

I assume most people posting can afford it?

In honesty, time is the massive factor for us. We have pointed out to our kids that us being able to flex work around driving them here there and everywhere (45 minute drive each way for training a minimum of 4 nights per week (not including weekend training) means that one or other of us needs to be available from 430. Then of course if one or other of us chaperones to travelling events that can be days off etc.

I'm sure we spend more on food etc too.

Does your little one wear the wigs and costumes? They are crazy dear! I’m in Ireland and think the fake tans etc should be done away with!

Ice hockey
You know the things that they insist they need, once they start paying for it themselves it is a different story. For example mismatched socks don't matter any more in training. Gloves last that bit longer than before, the super light weight replacement hockey stick isnt urgently needed every time the current one breaks, a cheaper one will do. 😆

Music - but she’s just graduated from a conservatoire and is working so the investment has paid off 😂

DD did bouldering for nearly 3 years which was pretty expensive. Unfortunately i can’t get her to do much now!

DD’s weekly horse riding lessons that I thought she’d get bored of within a few months quickly spiralled into owning her own pony (even when I swore at the beginning that I’d never buy one!!). Alongside the ££££ of the pony itself you’ve got tack, riding gear, livery fees, vet, dentist, physio, farrier, feed, lessons, transport & competition fees to worry about.. It was costing us about £500 per month back in 2019 so I hate to think what it would be now!!

Alongside the monetary issues it’s also one of those sports that really does take up your entire life and requires massive parental involvement. When a live animal is involved there is no chance for DC to just skip that day if they’re not feeling like it/can’t be bothered/want to go out with friends instead etc. The horse still needs exercised, mucked out and fed come rain or shine! It’s very good in terms of teaching kids dedication, grit & independence but I can’t lie, I was very glad to get my weekends, evenings and bank account back when DD finally quit..

Competitive dance - thankfully not ice hockey!
I did add it all up though and it was a shock to the system. She absolutely loves it and struggles socially a lot (ND + puberty has been a wild ride!) so we prioritise it, but I do feel badly for our son. He does taekwando quite seriously which fortunately isn't (yet) this sort of outlay but I wonder if he'd even ask to do something else as he's aware that we are spending LOTS on our daughter (not because we mention it a lot, it's just very obvious with the kit and trips and such)

Wow I should feel lucky that my DC plays the drums!

It did recently cost us 250 pounds for one (!!) cymbal with stand and I thought that was bad enough. I feel a bit better after reading some of the stuff on here.

Horseriding. Me, my DS15 and DD11. Youngest is ND and not safe for anything but lead rein and DS9 not really interested thank Christ. Our loan horse is really not a kids horse so if the younger ones wanted to start, we'd have to loan another.

Can I just say you are a legend. I think so many ND kids blossom if their special interest is nurtured in this way. My DDs is also an adventure sport which thankfully she discovered at Uni so the money outlet is her own. She has blossomed with it.

Yep, horse riding.
Always been obsessed with horses since she was tiny.
Now paying for weekly lessons and pony club once a month.
Thankfully other DD not interested!

Golf!

All if this!!! I don't think there's a better sport to build resilience though. Horsey kids are the toughest kids (plus they have no money or time for drugs 😂)

I think most hobbies can get fairly pricey if they get to take it seriously and it starts to involve significant amounts of travel, especially if you don't have facilities on your doorstep. My youngest plays a sport that in its own right isn't massively expensive compared to some but I hate to think how much we spent on travel over the years. It started off as a Saturday morning trip to a Sports Centre a few miles away but progressed to going further to a bigger club, then we added driving to county training an hour away, weekend matches outside the county and then when he made it onto the national governing body's talent programme I was driving a 300 mile round trip every Monday after school for training and all over the place at weekends for matches. Then there's Summer camps and tours and of course the higher the level they play at the better quality equipment they need and the more often it needs to be replaced. Had he just stuck to playing for the local club it would have remained a fairly inexpensive hobby, it was the travel for higher level training that really pushed the costs up.
I don't regret it though, it was a great experience for him, we made some really good friends and visited some interesting places. Fortunately we could afford it fairly easily but I don't think you can measure the cost only in terms of money. I think there's also a big cost in terms of time and potential impact on other members of the family. As it was my youngest it wasn't too bad for us as by the time his sport had become really time consuming his elder siblings were at University or at least doing their own hobbies etc fairly independently. I'm not sure I would have been as supportive if either the money we were spending or the time taken had impacted significantly on our other children.

My son is in a sport not that popular in the UK but popular in many other countries. He has sponsorship on kits and equipment but we pay a lot on 1-2-1 sessions during the term time. We then pay for his training overseas during school holidays. On top of that, we pay for his international competitions a few times a year. Even when he represents the GB in competitions, we sometimes have to cover part of the cost.

Does it worth it? As parents of a highly sensitive child with strong autistic traits, we sometimes feel that, during his early years, we entrusted much of his personal growth and development to his sport. For example, it was his coach who taught him how to tie his shoelaces. We had tried many times at home, but eventually gave up because it did not seem worth the struggle and simply bought him shoes with Velcro instead. However, when his coach told him that he needed lace-up shoes to train and compete, he listened and learned. Through sport, he also learned to look after his belongings, respect his coaches, teammates and opponents, control his emotions when the referees made a mistake or when an opponent behaved poorly. Many of the qualities he developed through sport have shaped the person he is today.

Right now, we are supporting him in pursuing his passion and his dream. Given his level and skills in the sport, we hope that he will at least be able to build a career and support himself through it. This path may be quite different from the future we once imagined for him as a child—attending a good university, establishing himself in a respected profession and living a comfortable life. But there is no single way to live a fulfilling life. Although both my husband and I are highly academic, we have come to accept the path our son has chosen, should he decide to continue pursuing it.

Well this is my argument with lottery funding.

in the sport I coach, that I’m obviously most familiar with, it’s very much discretionary over who gets the funding. It isn’t always the ones who are winning everything, it’s the ones the ptb like, or the coach they like, or the club.

so a 14 year old with no international competition record, but is at a good club or with a coach with an established record, will receive funding over an 18 year old who has won multiple junior European and world medals.

which of course then means that 18 year old can’t continue to the same level as they don’t have access to the support such as training camps, medical care, injury support, physio, nutrition etc. they can’t move to the better club as who pays the rent and living expenses? So then the 14 year old does get better, the 18 year old gives up, and the ptb say see, I told you so.

we’re talking at least 5k+ a year here. For a 14 year old living at home.

personally I think lottery funding should be limited to 18+ only. I’ve seen funded 12 year olds ffs. I’ve seen international competition where some kids have to pay their own way, but others go free. Dependent on the club/coach/whether they like the athlete, not who got the best result.

in the sport I coach if they took the funding away from the under 18’s they’ve decided will get an Olympic medal- I mean come on, no one can predict a 12 year olds Olympic future! They could set up funded “junior squads”, and use the money to pay for training costs, competition costs, support such as physio and nutrition. Take the top 10 in each age group.

then you are giving those who would maybe quit due to lack of funds or parental support a way to continue. Instead of one or two chosen ones getting everything.

Lottery funding that pays living costs should be adults only. I see many, many talented youngsters I simply can’t keep in the sport because they don’t get funding so they can’t see a way to continue past school.

I rode as a kid but nothing like what you are describing - I had a horse at a livery hard which my mum worked really hard to keep and we had an old transit van to tow the trailer. I had some friends at pony club who lived in huge houses, with stable blocks and multiple horses. The best bit was being able to sleep in their horse boxes at pony club, instead of a tent! It was another world, as you say.