AIBU sleeping arrangement

[strawberrylemons]

I’m visiting my parents this weekend, as are my 2 sisters (we’re all adults 23,29 and 32). I’m bringing my husband, sisters are going alone. I’m currently 19 weeks pregnant with twins, this is relevant.
all the bedrooms have a single bed in them, prior to pregnancy id just share with my husband and we’d have a bad nights sleep but get over it. Now im pregnant sleeping is a bit more uncomfortable and I need a pillow under my belly etc. so someone has to sleep on the sofa. I can’t make hubby sleep on the sofa because the living room is the walk way through to the kitchen so he’d have no privacy. So the options are for pregnant me or my sisters to go on the sofa. I’ve asked both my sisters if they’d give their bed up for me, they’ve both said no. My one sister even had a tantrum over it and said she just won’t visit if I’m going to take “her” bed (bear in mind she hasn’t lived at my parents house for 7 years).
I’m feeling a little disappointed in my sisters and that they wouldn’t let their pregnant sister have a bed for a weekend. My parents have offered their bed to my husband and I as a result but it doesn’t seem fair as they are both older and need the bed too.
Am I being unreasonable expecting someone to give up a bed for me? I would never ask at any other time in my life, it’s just one weekend during my pregnancy.

Well quite. Don’t go then. The idea of a woman pregnant with twins sleeping on the sofa is insane. Or just pay for a hotel if you really want to go - if it isn’t a priority then don’t.

Can be drive
Visit relative at hospital and pick you back up again in a few days?
How far is it?

it's not her babies. Next visit it will be "one sister must sleep on sofa because me, DH and the only-twins-in-the-universe must have your room" etc ad infinitum

DH can sleep on the sofa, or he can stay home, or you can both stay in a hotel.

If the house can't accommodate this many people without someone going on the sofa now, no way it can take them all plus two children.

Hotel sounds like the only option moving forward but OP says that's not affordable, so I guess this is the last ever overnight family gathering at this place.

Did they decide to get pregnant?
OP has made a choice to get pregnant and it’s on her to deal with the consequences. She’s being a brat.
would it be kind to offer up a bed? Of course. But OP is being entitled and a bit pathetic

I'm probably a similar age to the OP's parents, which means I get a decent nights sleep on the sofa. So the OP and DH should have taken the parent's bed and let one of them go on the sofa. The OP just wanted her own way and for her sister to have the sofa.

@Burnhamsmascara if you are putting up a partion wall and using it for an additional family bedroom, rather than renting/selling, there doesn't need to be a window and the building regs are minimal.

When the bedroom tax was being brought in, posters were saying how children don't need their own rooms, without taking into account how small some of the, turn of the century, two-up-two-down terraces in mining/industrial towns are. My DD has moved to a three bedroom, but there wouldn't be space for a air mattress. When they were built, people had two/three changes of clothes and one would be drying.

Perhaps the parents have realised that things will different going forward, the author is having twins - if visiting is difficult now, it’s not going to get any easier . An air bed would easily and cheaply solve the problem , but it’s a temporary solution .

If you read OP's posts you'll see that she's now sleeping on a mattress in the lounge.

leaving the sofa free for any unexpected guests :)

Solved.

Are you driving there?
do your parents have a drive?
drop the seats and sleep in it, sounds like it’ll be bigger than your old room.
lots of blankets and pillows, it’ll be cosy.

Why can’t you have one of the other larger rooms? Surely one of those three must have sufficient space for a single mattress? Even our tiny box room could (and did) regularly fit a second mattress in when kids slept over.

This makes sense now.

yeah shame about your sisters, but selfish people don’t change just because you do. Sad but just log it and don’t do them any similar favours. It’s an awful way to live but if it’s not reciprocal then it doesn’t work.

i get your reasoning op, with your husband being a guest. And I also get that as a pregnant woman you should have a bed.

What size are the bedrooms in feet? Is there space under bed to put the feet part?

he'd have said "hotel or I am not going"

You originally said you couldn't afford a hotel, which many posters (including myself) thought was worrying as you have twins on the way.

The fact is you could afford a hotel. But you are making the choice to take a whole year off work after your babies are born and need to save your money for that. Totally your choice, but to say you can't afford a hotel is inaccurate.

A lot of people use "can't afford" to mean "I choose to spend my money on other things" to be fair to OP.

As a mum, I would be mortified if one of my kids refused such a simple basic kindness for their pregnant sister.

i am interested to know where you fit in age compared to the others and if you’ve always been the scapegoat?

It’s got nothing to do with their pregnant sister though, the pregnant sister has a bed. She’s choosing to martyr herself on the sofa.

I don’t think that’s a fair comment, she’s explained why it isn’t appropriate for her husband to sleep there.

The op hasn't returned to inform us if her parents have any dogs, or if it's just her dogs that need to go out in the morning...

Of course it's appropriate for her DH to sleep on the sofa. OP is just making up nonsensical rules to try to manipulate the situation to get her own way.

Frankly if OP's DH doesn't insist on taking the sofa and instead forces either OP or one of her sisters to give up their beds for him, he's an utterly selfish dick.

Yes it was because her family will have to get up in the morning to let her dogs out through the living room, and they couldn’t be disturbing her husband on the sofa while they were looking after what I suppose are also his dogs.

I don’t understand what walking through the living room has to do with anything ? Surely if you all know your DH is sleeping there they will give him a wide berth until he’s up ?

Move a single bed into the living room. You sleep on that. DH sleeps on air mattress in the now empty bedroom. Since it's a bungalow it's very easy

This is the bit I now don't get.
Surely if it's their dogs then why wouldn't the husband be getting up to let them out? Even if the parents have dogs too, DH can be in charge of all of them.
The reasons seemed to be that he is a 'guest' and goes to bed early. Surely he can suck up having a few late nights (and see this as a way of getting used to newborns waking constantly).