How much do you spend on work clothes?

[TheJuryIsOut]

I'm starting a new job in a school in September so need some smart casual clothes. I'm basically starting from scratch as I've been a SAHM for several years and live in leggings/baggy sweatshirts.

So I'll need a variety of tops, jumpers, trousers, maybe a couple of dresses, tights, at least one pair of comfy shoes maybe two. I also need some new basics like underwear and socks.

If it's relevant DH works offshore and earns around £110k, we have 4 kids.

He seems to really be begrudging me buying new clothes and is wanting me to spend as little as possible.

What would be a reasonable budget for this? I'm not wanting designer stuff, just things from the high street.

Is it maybe just a family that isn't very interested in clothes rather than the DH being horrible.

I like shopping for work clothes (teacher). Definitely have separate work clothes. A work “uniform” is helpful. Black trousers, tops and loafers is standard. Other support staff wear tunic dresses and tights
trousers I wear twice man’s skirts and dresses once.
If I was starting out I’d get it all from Vinted.

2 trouser - one wide and one slim
4 tops- two fitted, two loose
2 shirt dresses/ tunic dresses
1 midi skirt
1 loafers
1 cardigan
1 belt
1 playing coat warm and waterproof with a hood
Back pack

can get this cheap in Vinted but invest a little more premium brands and they will last longer.

if this is too much a stretch, start with two trousers and 5 tops. That will do for a week.

make sure the tops are modestly high and that tunics do not show pants when leaning over or reaching up to write on board etc
pro tip when cleaning a board rub up and down not side to side.

From op: "He seems to really be begrudging me buying new clothes and is wanting me to spend as little as possible."
She wants clothes. He's being horrible about it and making her feel guilty

In your entire SAHM life you’ve never had disposable income for clothes and haircuts and socialising and fun?

At all?

Maybe I’ve misunderstood, @TheJuryIsOut?

He keeps his bank account separate, transfers his wife an amount of money that barely covered the minimum bills she needs to pay for while he’s away and she’s looking after his children. Then begrudges her spending on a few clothes for a new job when she doesn’t have enough appropriate items for the workplace.
It’s controlling.

I used to spend a lot on work clothes, I don’t any more.

M&S trousers, or similar comfortable in colours that work for you
jumpers for colder days
t-shirts or shirts (non iron) for warmer ones
flat shoes eg loafers
underwear that fits well, socks etc
supermarkets have some good stuff, but I’m tall so it doesn’t usually fit me
don’t forget you’ll need a bag, maybe lunch box / water bottle / flask

keep colours compatible so you can mix and match and swop in / out

I’d want £500 to build a wardrobe, and probably some more in a few months when I know what is working for me.

I hope you keep your forthcoming wages safely in your own bank account OP.

I didn't say I had no access to money?

I don't really get my hair cut or anything like that. Clothes I usually use birthday and Christmas money for, I get the occasional thing from Primark but no I don't really spend a lot on myself at all.

I think @Maroonmeant to say That’s not having access to money.

Because from what you’ve said, you don’t, @TheJuryIsOut. Money transferred to you to pay bills and care for children is not ‘access’.

Of course he is. You say yourself that he sends you a specific amount of money each month and that you'd have to ask him if you wanted anything extra.

Having "access to money" means not having to ask.

I’m a teacher just done my autumn term haul, about £300 probably includes 10-12 outfits by mix and matching.

he sends me a set amount each money which pays for some bills that are in my name, mine and the kids phone bills, the kids extra curricular activities, food & petrol for when he's away with work. I don't much (if any) left after that so I do have to ask him if I want to buy anything else.

This is not having access to family money.

Frankly no one should by a sahm in this situation so it’s good you’ve got a job lined up.

When you start your new job, you need to get money sent directly to your own account. It's not right that you have to ask your DH for money. Even as a SAHM, you should have access to money to spend as you need or want, and not have to ask for money.

Considering we spend more time at work than home and wear the clothes more often, I spend more as they need to be quality to last

When you start earning, is he planning to stop sending you money?

Is anything else changing in your household, other than you taking on a whole new layer of responsibility as well as all the childcare?

If your DH likes putting money aside and saving, how much of those savings are in your name?

Go to some charity shops. I picked up a lovely next dress for £3

@TheJuryIsOut I'm a teacher and I get most my stuff on vinted. Dresses about £5. A couple of nice shirts about £8 each. M&S black trousers.

My boots I got in the Clarks sale for £40 and they've done me 4 years so far!

I prefer second hand as its better for the environment.

It really depends on your style. I was a teacher and had two pairs of black trousers on the go at any one time and about 8 tops to cover all weathers. Pair of boots from the Clark’s outlet. Everything else from H&M or Sainsbury’s, mostly in sales. But I’m not remotely interested in clothes.

Agree with vinted. I started a new job and looked for brands on there I knew fitted me well
got a load of M&S stuff very cheap

Yes he is.

You need clothes FOR WORK and he is questioning it, knowing you’re not really a big spender anyway.

Why don’t you really get your hair cut? Won’t you need to factor that in too?

Does sound like you don't have access to money.

Did you used to have haircuts before being married to him?

I've always had a joint account with dh, from being married - whether i was a sahm or working.

Get lots of stretchy waistband trousers from
m and s not too expensive but feel good for work

Vinted is your friend

What a tight arse!

You need clothes, ffs.

I’d say a minimum of £300 if you’re looking at supermarkets. Maybe more depending on the cost of the shoes you find comfortable (comfy shoes are a must for teachers and worth the investment if you have to pay a bit more for the right ones).