To think late 40’s is an odd age?

[Theyareblaringoutshakiraagain]

I don’t know, I just feel weird.

Starting to feel older, which is depressing, but also i’m the same person inside, but not.
How can I be that same girl that danced until 6 am, now people barely notice me.

Not making much sense, but does/did anyone feel the same?

Cannot believe I’m nearly 50, didn’t feel this about 40, still felt young and had a baby!

50 has been like a huge downward spiral for me.
I avoid mirrors, have constant health anxiety and feel like I want to hide away from the world.

Has anyone had a positive experience with HRT?
I have been offered it but always refused as so many women I know have had a bad experience with it or said it didn't help them in the slightest.
I am late perimenopause and everything has just gone to pot now. I don't know where I am or who I am anymore.

I'm 49 but feeling very positive about 50- as if I'm moving into my grande dame years 😉 I feel much more able to be myself than when I was younger. Maybe also helps that for me the "dancing until 6am" years were a mixed bag- I had a lot of fun but also put up with a lot of shit, took stupid risks and didn't know myself very well.

If anything I maybe identify more with a younger me- might sound a bit odd but interests and loves I had as a child and early teen are coming to the foreground more- things I gave up as uncool as an older teen and young adult- and now here they are, still waiting for me.

I feel ok at being 52. I do think age is just a number really. My best mate died very suddenly at 20 and I worked as a nurse for years, so my outlook is slightly different I suppose. I had a crap childhood and some awful relationships so I feel the best I’ve ever felt.

@Asmileisworthathousandwords HRT is definitely helping me but it has taken a while to get me on the right one, and the right dose, and I still feel like I need some more adjustments to it. I definitely think it’s worth trying though. It has helped my irritability and anger a lot.

Very positive, it took about three months to work, it evened my moods, helped with aches and pains, stopped my debilitating night sweats, I think it has helped with shiny hair and nice skin too.

I have had a good experience and actually everyone I know who was suffering usual peri symptoms - anxiety driving, anger (usually at men, the veil drops!), migraines - all pretty much evaporated. I still get migraines but they don't just come on like a thunderclap and I have time to take something before it gets worse.

oh my goodness I could have written a lot of this, I am early 40s had my 1st at 28 so I have an almost 13 year old and a 5 year old, its quite hard. I also have made many mistakes that I do regret and wish I could go back in time and make different choices. Also the dh thing, love him but was he the right choice I am not sure but I also believe whats meant to be and all that...

A word of caution with hrt; if you’re still having regular periods the extra oestrogen can make them much heavier unless opposed with the right amount of progesterone. Get that bit right is in my own experience hard - and when hrt wasn’t working again they just kept upping it. (I then had to come off all of it due to cancer)

I felt better when titrating off it, I feel a lower dose coupled with a diet over haul and building strength (which I desperately needed to do) and managing stress was much better.

It’s the only way I’ve managed being on tamoxifen which can be a pretty yucky drug and at times I’ve felt better than when I was on hrt.

I read this article in the times this morning and I do feel like a great deal rings true. Apparently they’ve never actually researched women in peri and hrt a great deal. Brain fog. Anxiety. Insomnia. Is perimenopause really to blame?

https://www.thetimes.com/article/fe6bb582-d285-4692-87fa-fecfd54bb2f9?shareToken=862b9640e82e7fd9fdbddb68ae99076f

Hrt was great at first but the effects would wear off I’d find. And the heavier periods in my caused huge amounts of inflammation which would build up before and leave me exhausted afterwards. I do have hypothyroidism which seemed to complicate things but so many friends on hrt don’t seem to be faring any better than I am on tamoxifen right now.

it’s definitely something worth trying but not necessarily the answer for everyone.

Before the menopause revolution hit I read quite a lot of Lara Briden and Lisa Mosconi in an effort to try to make sense of things. I was really struggling but no one had mentioned hrt/ menopause. Lara described eating a certain amount of protein before 11 am for women - I can’t remember how much, but I aim for 30-40 over breakfast and snacks. I started doing this due to resistance training and cancer management (they recommend 30 g each meal to help maintain strength through treatments) but I feel it’s helped generally somehow. Mosconi describes diet - basically the MIND diet. And yoga nidra for stress management. And lots of omega 3 and b vitamins. I have been lucky enough to see an nhs menopause specialist as I am thinking of coming off tamoxifen (I go through phases of bad sweats and I don’t seem to be able to manage my thyroid levels) who also recommended omega 3.

A gp friend recommended cbt for menopause before I was diagnosed with breast cancer. At the time I was quite disgusted! It felt victim blamey.

I’ve since had two stints over 3 years and both times they’ve made a huge impact on my sleep and symptoms. The skills I’ve learned in the last stint have been really useful and I find I can revisit the tools and get myself back on track when needed.

I am enjoying my late 40s - i still have tons of energy to do things I enjoy and my kids are old enough to be less dependent on me. The only thing I dont love is the financial pressure of a big mortgage and uni costs, i thought id be financially better off but the dramatic rise in mortgage rates and cost of living is biting a bit now

I enjoyed it too, I was briefly an empty nester when the youngest started uni, I had time for my friends and DH. Regarding finances I did find things improved once our DC finished uni.

Didn't mind late 40s at all but it was like a switch flipped when I turned 50.

Not really, I am 54 and haven't ever felt like that. I don't expect to be doing the things I did in my 20's. I would enjoy dancing until 10pm but not until 3am. I'd want to go to bed! I enjoy different things now, reading, gardening and walking.

As for the 'invisible' thing, I can never relate to that. I have never felt it but I do tend to initiate conversation, and I smile a lot, so people would notice me I suppose.

I lost both my parents in their early 60's and a couple of really good friends died at 50, so I am just very grateful for every single day of good health for me, and my children.

I haven’t found this, I’ve been on two pumps of Ostrogel a day for the past eight years and haven’t noticed it wearing off.

Two pumps is likely an appropriate amount.

As I say, for me, other factors were an additional issue that when addressed dealt with most of my symptoms but it took time to understand what that was. As I was bleeding the increased oestrogen started to cause more issues than it was solving.

Thanks for this