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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect my nipples to be off-limits as a topic of conversation during soft play?

35 replies

stroppyshopper · 26/06/2008 21:48

I read the threads a lot on this site, but rarely post. But tonight I'm asking for your help, please!

Was at soft play today with a woman I am friendly with, but not very close, IYKWIM. We were having a conversation about pull-up nappies, when she suddenly shifted topic and told me that the next time I wear a tee-shirt I must be sure to wear a tee-shirt bra with some padding, as my nipples were too prominent. Then she smiled and added that she knew what she was talking about because, like me, she had large nipples.

WTF?!

I was part humiliated, part pissed off, and I suppose a little amused. After we left her, I began wondering if other people I know are thinking the same thing... if maybe loads of mums in my cirlce are secretly tut-tutting over my nipple display...

Of course, I headed straight to M&S and bought something like a padded bra. "Tee shirt" bras don't come in my size, you see...

So, what do you think? Am I being unreasonable? I mean, we are all mothers. We all have breasts. All breasts (barring surgery or horrid body surfing accidents) have nipples. Why should I try to pretend I don't have them? What do I care if I have my "highbeams" on at soft play?!?

OP posts:
mrsleroyjethrogibbs · 26/06/2008 21:49

good grief. how rude of her. Who cares if your nipples are on display or not.
Dont cover them up, thats what I say.

catsmother · 26/06/2008 21:50

Maybe she was coming on to you ? ...... what with smiling and telling you all about hers !

SenoraPostrophe · 26/06/2008 21:50

she probably thought she was being kind.

this wouldn't bother me really. I'd rather she did that than tell everyone else about my prominent nips. but I would also probably ignore her.

Doodle2U · 26/06/2008 21:51

"I began wondering if other people I know are thinking the same thing..."

Well, if they try hanging their coats up, you can be reasonably sure they are

Mine only stick out when I'm in important client meetings. My wish to impress comes in a poor second to their wish to do the same

Original poster
stroppyshopper · 26/06/2008 21:52

Wow, it never crossed my mind that she could be coming on to me!

OP posts:
mrsleroyjethrogibbs · 26/06/2008 21:52

you could of course have lifted your top up and bared your 'prominent nipples' and said

'what these little things?'

BibiThree · 26/06/2008 21:52

You should have said "Prominent? Oh but that's the way I like them"

luckylady74 · 26/06/2008 21:56

How rude! Mind you I worked with someone who must have been chilly a lot and it was so distracting, but I must be just a sad part of this breast obsessed culture of ours .

Original poster
stroppyshopper · 26/06/2008 21:56

Yes, if I thought a bit more quickly I could have said that they were just swollen due to some rough foreplay the night before, or that I think I might be allergic to the glue I used with my tassles... oh, hindsight...

OP posts:
Mummyandi · 26/06/2008 21:57

OMG some people are so rude. I can't believe how rude some people are. Everyone has nipples, sometimes they are noticeable, it can't be helped.
I'm just shocked at how some people feel they have a right to just say anything to anyone

BetteNoire · 26/06/2008 21:58

She clearly has nipple envy.
I suggest you ditch the padded bra, and ensure you rub yourself with an ice cube before you next meet up with her.
(And change your posting name to Nippletastic or similar! )

ladymariner · 26/06/2008 21:58

Yeah and then added "it takes me hours of tweaking to get them this perky, know what I mean, nudge nudge, wink wink...."
The cheeky cow! I'd have been pissed off tbh, but thats cos I've got big boobs and people do make comments and think its ok. They then find out that its not!!!!

cwtchy · 26/06/2008 22:01

Do you think there is a little gang of smooth chested mothers all gossiping around the ball pool about your nips...

hester · 26/06/2008 22:02

She clearly has nipple-consciousness. I can't believe people generally are staring at your nipples. I mean, do you notice other women's nipples? And, if you do, does it interest you for more than a nanosecond? Would you ever, ever bother saying anything?

Honestly, don't let it bother you any longer. It's her stuff.

hester · 26/06/2008 22:03

She clearly has nipple-consciousness. I can't believe people generally are staring at your nipples. I mean, do you notice other women's nipples? And, if you do, does it interest you for more than a nanosecond? Would you ever, ever bother saying anything?

Honestly, don't let it bother you any longer. It's her stuff.

Oh, and by the way, I very much doubt she's coming on to you! I'm lesbian and STILL don't go around staring at other women's nipples! And it certainly wouldn't be my choice orf chat-up line!

puffling · 26/06/2008 22:10

She was rude to tell you, whether they were sticking out or not.

BEAUTlFUL · 26/06/2008 22:18

Oooh, yuck, she's controlling! The smile is the giveaway. They always say something hurtful but "for your own good", then smile at you. Like your reward for taking your medicine.

Maybe.

ladymariner · 26/06/2008 22:20

I really hate people who do that. there's a woman I work with who is a bloody queen at saying the bitchiest things but in such a sugary sweet way! Yuck

flubdub · 26/06/2008 22:24

Oh, Iv been chortling at some of those posts.
lol at ice cubes!

Original poster
stroppyshopper · 26/06/2008 22:41

Oddly, she phoned me 15 minutes ago to say she had a nice time and to ask about my shopping trip. (When we parted, I told her I was headed to M&S.) I said it was fine. She then asked me outright had I bought any bras...

So, either she is reading this thread OR this is getting very, very, very weird indeed.

If she is reading this thread, I'm sorry, but I'm too much of a wuss to tell you that I find your comments about my nipples a bit awkward and am instead hiding behind mumsnet.

Ah, the age of the Internet.

OP posts:
Original poster
stroppyshopper · 26/06/2008 22:43

Oh, and I lied and said I'd not bought one. Maybe that makes ME weird...

OP posts:
BEAUTlFUL · 26/06/2008 22:50

She asked outright if you'd bought bras? This is a woman you hardly know?

If you are reading this thread, weirdo nipple-policewoman, stop talking to acquaintances about their baps, ffs! Have a daughter, wait 12 years and then enjoy hours of lesisurely bra-shopping, with lots of measuring business and strap-chats. Until then, enough with the neighbourhood nip watch!

BEAUTlFUL · 26/06/2008 22:52

I'd be very tempted to ask her outright about the state of her bush. "I know what it's like to have a Chewbacca Chuff."

paperdoll · 26/06/2008 22:53

What an odd thing to happen. I think the "controlling" theory is spot on.

Nipples are so not a big deal, really. Mine don't show so much now, weirdly, but they used to be virtually always visible and I just tried hard not to give a toss about people's reactions. It's so tiresome, all the panic around it - cover them up, at all costs! God forbid there should be a nipple shape through your clothes! I would've had to wear eight thick jumpers at all times in order to "conform"

paperdoll · 26/06/2008 22:54

LOL at Beautiful

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