AIBU regarding our petsitter

[Givenup2026]

We've had two decent pet sitters before, but they eventually bailed on us, so we had to look for another one. They’re decent enough, no issues in our return, but it turns out that the bed we gave them was too small for them (single bed) which we understand TBH, however the only other option is for them to sleep in our bed.

The main problem is that obviously is a bit short notice to find an alternative (or find another way to fix their problem).

So although we understand we’re also a bit miffed. So AIBU to feel this way?

I think if you just bite the bullet, buy a mattress protector and let them stay, the peace of mind you'll have knowing that your pets are well cared for will outweigh your discomfort.

I understand how you feel, but it's one of those things that we magnify in our minds and then find it wasn't so bad.
If the petsitter is a decent sort they will be careful with your space..... hopefully busy with your pet all day!

My in-home pet sitter always stays in my bedroom. I make sure the bed is made with clean bedding before I leave and that I leave clean towels and that I leave bedside table-tops clear. I am sure my mattress has some stains too but she wouldn't see those as the bed is made before she arrives.

Can they curl up with the dog/cat? 🤔🐶🐱 😴 💤
Tell them it's a new thing called "Immersive Pet-Sitting" and that it's all the rage on Insta and Tik-Tok 😀

If she does this the pet sitter will probably decide not to sit and then she is left with no one. If the bed is too small then it's too small and they will be uncomfortable.
OP does the pet sitter have to sleep over ? Couldn't they just come in the day? Have you investigated kennels? Not all are big and impersonal.

Is the pet sitter planning on company? The single bed was fine last time?

I don't know why you are miffed it they rejected a further booking. They aren't obliged to work for you.

Or did they accept the booking and then last minute say only if they can have your bed? That would be annoying.

You need to think about the accommodation though. It's not just the single bed, it's the room size. If the bed is against the wall and there's only 40cm clearance, it means the room is only 1.3m wide (3' bed) or even just 1.1m wide (2"6" bed). Is there even other furniture - bedside table/lamp/anywhere to put their clothes? It's not really even single bedroom sized. I can do a single bed if I have to, couldnt sleep in that room.

Bearing in mind you've already lost 2 other sitters...

Under UK Space Standards a single bedroom has to have 7.5sq m of space and be a minimum 2.15m wide. Are you repurposing an office/box room that was never intended to be a bedroom?

If your mattress is tired, why not order a new mattress for you, let the sitter stay this time, then you can find a new sitter for next time and have a new mattress for you that nobody else has slept on? Win / win.

They only told us last minute that they needed our bed. And I know the bedrooms aren’t huge, but our teenagers sleep in them and they just sleep in them as they don’t have any other options. Plus that room is the best one.

out room is just as claustrophobic (if not more) it only happens to be able to fit a double bed.

It sounds as though. OP acknowledged the room is very small and the pet sitter has a build like a rugby player. I imagine he was very uncomfortable

Yes thats correct. You either get on with it or dont go on holiday. Lots of us do things out of our comfort zone every single day. A change of bedding when you get back and all will be fine. Try not to give small issues so much headspace. When you get back from your holiday maybe look for home boarding for your dog. Mine has gone to a boarder since he was a puppy and loves staying there. Sounds like that sort of arrangement would suit you better.

I'm not sure what you're asking? Your petsitter will presumably not stay if she can't stay in a bed thats big enough. The only bed big enough is yours. You have no way of providing another big bed. There are no other petsitters. So either she sleeps in your bed (while you sleep in someone else's on holiday) or you stay home and everyone sleeps in their own beds. Doesn't really matter who is BU, this is where you're at.

There's not a chance I'd want a pet sitter sleeping in our bedroom. I'd lock the bedroom door tbh.
If he's too big for a single bed he shouldve made it clear when booking initially.
Tell him to bring an airbed for the living room.
No kennels locally?

The problem is that we have two dogs and a cat. We don’t know how the youngest one would react to kennels, but we know the elderly would
howl all night (she’s done it in the past). It’s also a 10 day trip

What a strange thread. Kennels are there for a reason. My pet sitters have always slept in our room as it's the nicest and I want them to a) feel comfortable and b) want to come back.

Get a mattress topper to hide the stains and remove anything you don't want them to find.

It's August. I assume a trust worthy petsitter will have more options for clients than OP will have for petsitters. I doubt given this they would be that enthusiastic about being told to buy themselves an airbed.

You have people working for you sleeping in your bed?

Op, tell them to get on with it or bring their own double airbed.

Tbh I find the idea of someone in my house without me full stop uncomfortable and that's why we've found sitters who will have our dog at their's.
But if it really is too short notice to find an alternative I think you're just going to have to suck it up on this occasion and let them use your bed.

I'm with you OP. Nobody but me and DH sleep in our bed / bedroom. Private space is a no-go for strangers imo.
(I'd make an exception for one of my kids, or grandkids, though, if it HAD to be done)
Find a petite pet sitter.

I don't really mind anyone sleeping in my bed (when I'm not in it myself!), so can't really get on board with this being an issue. We go away for long trips and have had people stay at the house each time, some for a night or two, some longer, and they've always used our bed (we have one double and a single, some people who've stayed would be very uncomfortable on a single and I'd feel terrible forcing them to). I just try to make sure the duvet, pillows and mattress protector are in a relatively good state before we go away and let anyone know where they can find the clean bedding etc if needed. It's just a bed, not like they're borrowing my knickers or anything!

You can get really good quality blow up mattresses in camping shops, amazon these days. you could set that up in the living room?

People are being deliberately obtuse on this thread I think.

If they'd agreed to do it and have only just told you that the bed is too small, leaving no time to find an alternative then yanbu

That’s exactly what happened!

Why would they see the period stains on the mattress anyway? You’ll presumably be putting fresh sheets on for them… I can understand the gripe but honestly, nothing stopping them from doing this without even telling you. You’re letting a stranger live in your house while you’re away, they could do anything in theory in your private space.

I don't think there's anything you can do OP but accept it. I hate the thought of someone sleeping in my bed so I would probs order a mattress and pillow protectors. I have to put these thoughts aside when I go on holiday or stay at hotels as who knows what's happened in those beds!

Did they specify they wanted a double bed when you booked them? I think they're being cheeky really, it's not going to kill them to sleep in a single bed. Assuming it's a normal size bed I don't see the issue.