AIBU to consider getting married on my birthday?

[Bishbashbush]

Just looking for opinions on whether or not it would be strange to get married on my birthday.

Bit of background. DP and I recently got engaged, after eight lovely years together. Delay was caused by my divorce. We’ve both been married before (to other people) and had the “typical” wedding for our respective cultures. Our families are split between three countries.

We want to elope and get married middle of next year. Just us and my two DC (16 &12) The date that works best is my birthday. I’m happy with it and so is DP but something is throwing me off. It would be so lovely to wake up on my birthday and get married. I know if we ever split then my birthday will forever be tainted. Obviously neither of us are thinking of this outcome but life is life.

Did you get married on your birthday? Would you?

Just do it!

Congratulations

OMG how old are you ?
Just do it. X

I wasn’t sure which way to vote but I don’t see much reason to avoid your birthday. You’ll have a wonderful day!

up you, five if you want to.

Yes. I would. And did.

Personally, I wouldn’t. Both are lovely things to celebrate, but I wouldn’t want them to be on the same day. Your birthday is about you. Then it forever becomes a day when you’re celebrating your partner, thinking about anniversary gifts, making a restaurant booking for both of you. We get so few days for ourselves and especially as women do a lot of the emotional labour of special celebrations. I’d want to have those be too different days rather than mashed up together.

I wouldn’t get married on my birthday I’d want another date.

my friend got married on her birthday and divorced a few years later her birthday is a bit tainted for her due to what happened.

What’s going to happen in the future when he manages to forget your birthday And your anniversary? 😆

This was an option for me but decided not to. Divorced now. So glad I didn't.

Hadn’t thought of this but that’s a good point, as well as the potential to always feel a bit sad on your bday if you split up! Which is a slightly pessimistic but still very real possibility.

Would it bother you if you split up? It might not seem as nice if you divorce

Just do it!

I got married on my birthday - no problems but now I am widowed it makes my birthday a bit sad.................... wish I'd picked a different date.

(I've name changed for this post).

Almost, DH and I initially planned and booked a tiny wedding on our shared birthday but then cancelled and booked a slightly bigger one on our anniversary instead.

We were going to get married on my birthday, just because it happened to be the only date we could at the time of year we wanted. COVID got involved though and we had to postpone twice and ended up getting married at a completely different time of year, just so we could get married.

Oh I’m sorry this happened 😞 I naively hadn’t even considered this outcome.

Everyone will combine that celebration and your anniversary will be your birthday which should be your day. You’re losing out!

Very good points! I had loosely considered this as I do genuinely enjoy my birthday and love feeling a bit special for the day. I feel the wedding anniversary would take precedence. Might be best to have two separate occasions.

Don't do it - my late OH's birthday was the day after our anniversary. We always intended to celebrate both each year, but with limited time, money, and energy one always ended up a bit lackluster. You'll regret it in a few years when you never get a day that is fully yours while your husband still gets the full works.

I got married on my birthday. I get a bit annoyed that I have to get DH something for my birthday 😅 Not really I don't mind, he is a good gift buyer.

If you divorce again your birthday will always be a reminder of that
I wouldn’t for that reason alone

We got married on DHs birthday. His view was that it would be almost impossible to forget our anniversary.

My friend married on her birthday but split up and warned me off doing it and I am glad to have a completely different date for my anniversary.

I wouldn’t. My birthday is very close to dhs and even that makes it hard to get to do something about me. A wedding anniversary would mean you never can.

I married on my 30th birthday. Found out 4 hours later that he'd cheated. My wedding day quickly became my divorce day.
The following birthday was really tough. But after that, I've never looked back. I don't regret it being my birthday, I barely ever think of it/him anymore. I'm 41 now and have made up for it since by being happy and married to the love of my life (not on either of our birthdays!).
Personally, if you normally enjoy celebrating your birthday, I'd probably avoid it as its hard to celebrate both as fully as you'd want to. I wouldn't give consideration overly to if you separated in the future - your birthday will still be a happy day for you 😊. Maybe the first one or two will be tough, but then life moves on...