To not get emotional at end of school stuff?

[MercyMeMary11]

I have nc for this.

I did not get emotional at the start of when dc started at primary school. Nor am I emotional when they leave. Currently youngest dd is leaving primary school and with both dc, I didnt feel much at their respective leavers assemblies.

Other parents, have said, in their own words, that they are "a wreck".

Oldest dd started secondary school a couple of years ago, and I just focused on the practical side of things.

Is there something not exactly right? I think I am the only one amongst my friends- other school mums- who is like this.

I don't. I don't get emotional at all really. Only if something really bad happens.

did I write this and forget I did it?

when DC1 started preschool I celebrated with cake! 🤣 I do love my DCs but it was so great to have a break for once.

I’m with you. Even dropping off at uni, I’ve never understood the expectation of ‘being a wreck’ about it. I’m always just excited for them to be moving along in life, taking in new experiences and growing in independence.

OP, we are all different. I cry at films but not much in real life and can feel emotional at leavers' events even when the DC are not mine! I was just grateful to DDs primary school for the wonderful opportunity she'd had but I wasn't a wreck. My DH is less of a wreck than me even. We're all different. Good not to be a wreck if you can avoid it. Sounds exhausting!

Some people are emotional, some not. I have my DS’ one next week and I’m not sure how I’ll be - won’t be more than a tear in my eye as I’m not one for crying publicly as I get very red-faced!

Our school’s is 1.5 hours long so I do wonder what the format is and why it takes so long. All I’ve heard is that they put a Reception and a Year 6 photo of each child up on the big screen, so I have no idea what else they do.

Yup. I’m with you.

We seem to be in an arms race of schmaltz and manufactured sentimentality. I find it somewhere between perplexing & excruciating!

Same. My kids are the same too. They did get a few photos with school pals but no tears- a lot of children were crying.

I assume it's the type of thing people only mention if they have strong feelings on it. It's not a secret that I wasn't upset about my kids moving on in life it equally I didn't tell anyone this, so if you know me but didn't see me at leavers assembly you might assume I was emotional over it.

I wasn’t emotional when they started school but I was bloody happy I could get something approximating a life back.

Yes when they started school, I thought I was great that they are learning new things.
When they left, I thought it was time and they needed to move on to secondary school.

With my older dd 's school, the headteacher was horrid, so I was glad she was moving on. Younger dd has been attending a very good SEN school, but likewise, she has come to the end of her time there.

I find it , a pp said, perplexing when people are getting mushy.

What are your thoughts that are making you emotional, if that is you? I'm not having a dig. I am really trying to understand.

Agree. My DD’s primary school held endless ‘end of primary school’ events that seemed designed to try provoke an emotional reaction and make them feel all important in some weird version of main character syndrome.

I was just relieved it was over. Secondary school has been a far better experience for both my kids.

I'm feeling it today. We're only at the end of Yr 1 but he wasn't expected to be here to see it so yes, I am quietly emotional today. He's undoubtedly more poorly than he was when he was given the prognosis but now our next goal is Christmas 2026.

Super emotional with my eldest starting school as seemed such a mile stone. Cried as I left them.

but when both left primary school I felt nothing but utter relief - an end to crap education (school not meeting needs both had disabilities) and also an end to all the other bloody mums on the school run.

Primary school run was worse than being a kid in the playground with all the mums drama and gossip and cliques.

I was elated to think we never had to step foot in those gates again.

You have to be an over thinker really. I didn’t really get emotional when dd1 started reception but I really was very upset when she finished y6. For two reasons, one she hadn’t had the best primary school experience and I was sad for her and two I’m a high school teacher and knew how rough high schools are and what they get exposed to once they’re there. Now with dd2 I do get emotional at all the milestones because I know how fast it all goes by.

I couldn't wait to shake the dust off my feet from my children's primary school days! My daughter had had a rotten time (ND) and didn't even attend her leavers' party - she was so ostracised by the girls in her class by that time.

As a teacher I'd had a lot to do with leavers' assemblies and they struck me as OTT. I remember having to go round begging some girls to write something nice about one unpopular girl in the class because no-one wanted to - again, a sweet odd-ball like my daughter who it just wasn't cool to be friends with. I saw the seamy side of all the sentimental stuff and it made me sad.

I was also so glad to escape the dreaded School Gate each day. I had lots of parent friends - but I saw them outside school anyway. The school politics, the competitive parents trying to find out if your child was in a higher group or a more advanced reading book than theirs....good riddance to primary school! Secondary was utter bliss.

Agreed. Crying is woke nonsense. When my children finished school I gave them a firm handshake and then we gathered up all their uniform and burnt it.

I think it’s just one of those things where we are all different and no one is right or wrong! I find things ending so hard - I actually teared up at the email re the leavers activities - my son is in reception and I do not know a single child in year 6 who is leaving 🤣

Major transitions are often a time to reflect - it makes me think of how little they were when they started, how much they have grown, the contribution that has been made to that growth by all the teachers along the way.

Primary school also provided us with connections to other parents, some of whom we have stayed in touch with (since the older child left), but other friendships came to an end as children moved on and made new friends. We know from experience now that our relationship with our children’s Secondary school is very different, and much more distant than it has been with their Primary school. it is the end of an era.

Although I love the people my children are becoming there are also moments I miss the people they were, and leaving Primary brings that into focus. I’ve spent years walking them to school, and picking them up. Those moments of walking hand in hand, having a chat about anything and everything were really special. Friday is the last chance I will have to do that walk with my youngest, and I’ll miss it. It reminds me as well that the days of my son wanting to hold my hand (especially as I’m his dad!) are definitely numbered. I won’t know when it happens for the last time, and it is another little thing that I will miss.

None of this makes me a “wreck”, but it does make me feel something!

🤣🤣🤣

SusanChurchouse · Today 13:53
Pandaonahill · Today 13:45
Yup. I’m with you.
We seem to be in an arms race of schmaltz and manufactured sentimentality. I find it somewhere between perplexing & excruciating!
Agree. My DD’s primary school held endless ‘end of primary school’ events that seemed designed to try provoke an emotional reaction and make them feel all important in some weird version of main character syndrome.
I was just relieved it was over. Secondary school has been a far better experience for both my kids.

I totally agree. I found the schmaltz and emotional manipulation distasteful and actually unhealthy. Things seemed to be organised in order to make the children and parents cry.

I thought it was creepy.

@didntlikeanyofthesuggestions You had me at the firm hand shake!!! 🤣🤣

I really don't like all the events, pomp, and ceremony. I think it is absolutely bizarre.

I am, however, privately really emotional about my dc1 leaving preschool and moving on.

I thought I'd just feel relief when they left primary but the leavers assembly was so cute with old photos, songs, trophies and also they all did a very cute speech thanking people in their lives for all their help, that I was a bit of an emotional wreck at the end!! I just felt so proud of them. Very glad they are now at secondary and I know nothing about what they are up to educationally though!! I much prefer this stage.

I got emotional, I do get more emotional with happy events and milestones. I'm less emotional with sad things (bereavement aside). I've definitely cried more happy tears than sad tears.

I often think I'd like to feel more emotion about these things, but the anti-depressants tend to stop me crying at real life stuff. I still cry when people die in EastEnders though.