Help end medical misogyny. Sign our petition.

Help end medical misogyny.
Sign our petition.

Sign the petition

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

To feel utterly miserable about a future with Andy Burnham as PM?

853 replies

OneWarmHazelQuail · Today 01:23

I feel like I'm being stung in every possible way at the moment- £15 a day on tube to work, high mortgage costs, high energy costs, private schooling for SEN child (I was told state wouldn't be unlikely to assist him as he isn't mute or violent). My parents have had to help fund schooling it felt like my only hope as son has behavioural issues.

I also have an unsold old home that I have to rent out as it wouldn't sell. Buy-to-let mortgage costs, agent fees, maintenance and tax put me in a loss position.

I can't bear what the future holds with Andy Burnham. I have no doubt that he will find new and imaginative ways to keep me in this financial nightmare. I'm literally struggling from food poverty but regarded as rich by policy.

YABU- Andy Burnham is actually going to make things better

YANBU- I'm screwed

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
OonaStubbs · Today 15:59

Hopefully Burnham will implement a MASSIVE crack down on crime because it is Out of Control in many parts of the country.

Differentforgirls · Today 16:01

SummerPeonies2026 · Today 15:56

Toby Blair was a conservative in all but name, I suppose. Labour lost their party identity, integrity and direction a long time ago, these days they have no idea who they are, or who they are representing. Apart from woke trans groups etc ofc.

Well I’m “woke”. I don’t see it as an insult tbh.

To feel utterly miserable about a future with Andy Burnham as PM?
SummerPeonies2026 · Today 16:01

OonaStubbs · Today 15:59

Hopefully Burnham will implement a MASSIVE crack down on crime because it is Out of Control in many parts of the country.

No, the opposite is happening.

The new guidance is to avoid using custodial sentences for anything other than the most serious of crimes. Including sexual assault and GBH and carrying weapons. The public are yet to cotton on to just how watered down our justice system is going to become. Community orders will be given out to almost every offender.

Differentforgirls · Today 16:04

OneWarmHazelQuail · Today 15:57

you made an assumption, plenty of children with SEN thrive in State schools.

No. As soon as concerns were flagged, I took him to the GP. As waiting lists were very long, I took him to a private OT and a private speech and language therapist as well as following NHS pathway. In addition, I reached out to health visitor, family centre and autism charity.

In addition, I got in contact with a circle of friends from university who had relevant experience and asked them to opine collectively on documents and guidance provided - this included a GP, a nursery owner, a state school teacher, a parent in state system with 2 SEN kids, a parent with a SEN child in private school. I got them all on a WhatsApp group and gave them detail about my sons issues and current circumstances and asked them to provide their professional opinions based on the facts.

I would not upend my own life, my children's lives, my parents lives on merely an assumption. I spoke to everyone I could and made an informed decision based on all of the information I had available to me.

I'm not saying that there aren't kids in SEN that don't thrive. I'm saying that I needed immediate assistance that the state could not provide. Unless you have seen a child in prolonged, heightened distress, you will never understand.

Can I ask you something? You left your house due to a traumatic incident. Did you have your children then?

SummerPeonies2026 · Today 16:06

We are screwed - really we are, and people think it’s bad now.

LizzieW1969 · Today 16:07

SummerPeonies2026 · Today 15:57

In what way do you think turfing out their leader mid term because things are going so badly - how on earth is that measured as a success??

Edited

The Tories themselves did that very thing several times, didn't they? That's the party you plan to vote for.

OonaStubbs · Today 16:07

Labour needs to become a party for workers, not shirkers. Like the name says, LABOUR.

Youhadrambledonfor18pages · Today 16:16

SummerPeonies2026 · Today 15:46

I am so angry that at a moment of great peril - war breaking out in the ME, war in Europe, a Cold War with Russia, cost of living becoming unbearable for some, the issues that are surfacing that are so serious.

The Labour Party choose now to naval gaze. It is entirely irresponsible and leaving the U.K. exposed to far larger problems. Rudderless, leaderless. Where is the policy? Where is the vision? Where is the security of knowing someone is steering the ship?

I am worried we are never going to recover as a country. Financially and in all ways. Now we have a new leader foisted on us that virtually no one wants - and I almost pity him. It’s an impossible task with his party baying for money and insisting on changes he just can not deliver.

You seem to have a huge problem with the fact that he’s “unelected” yet four of the last five PMs from the party you intend to vote for took office without a general election (all within the last decade).

Pedallleur · Today 16:19

OonaStubbs · Today 15:59

Hopefully Burnham will implement a MASSIVE crack down on crime because it is Out of Control in many parts of the country.

Some would say it's been like that for years depending where you live. 10 billion pounds was robbed during COVID.

Youhadrambledonfor18pages · Today 16:21

SummerPeonies2026 · Today 15:54

I am - and when I get to GE I will be voting for the conservatives, she has been a wonderful MP and is a polished professional with real integrity.

Is this a joke- wonderful MP? She’s literally never in the constituency, other than the occasional photo op for the local paper. Dates back to way before she was party leader as well so that’s no excuse.

Pedallleur · Today 16:24

SummerPeonies2026 · Today 15:23

The Labour Party should make the most of their last days in government. It’s been an abject failure, the best we can hope for is that this won’t produce a reform landslide.

Can you list the successes of the 14 years and numerous Prime ministers of Tory Govt that Labour inherited?

Differentforgirls · Today 16:25

OonaStubbs · Today 16:07

Labour needs to become a party for workers, not shirkers. Like the name says, LABOUR.

Keir Hardie became known as the MP for the unemployed. You know the actual founder of the Labour Party?

www.keirhardiesociety.org/keir-hardie.html

Somesuch · Today 16:27

OneWarmHazelQuail · Today 15:57

you made an assumption, plenty of children with SEN thrive in State schools.

No. As soon as concerns were flagged, I took him to the GP. As waiting lists were very long, I took him to a private OT and a private speech and language therapist as well as following NHS pathway. In addition, I reached out to health visitor, family centre and autism charity.

In addition, I got in contact with a circle of friends from university who had relevant experience and asked them to opine collectively on documents and guidance provided - this included a GP, a nursery owner, a state school teacher, a parent in state system with 2 SEN kids, a parent with a SEN child in private school. I got them all on a WhatsApp group and gave them detail about my sons issues and current circumstances and asked them to provide their professional opinions based on the facts.

I would not upend my own life, my children's lives, my parents lives on merely an assumption. I spoke to everyone I could and made an informed decision based on all of the information I had available to me.

I'm not saying that there aren't kids in SEN that don't thrive. I'm saying that I needed immediate assistance that the state could not provide. Unless you have seen a child in prolonged, heightened distress, you will never understand.

State schools have many many autistic children who experience heightened, prolonged distress. That happens with autism. State schools are better than the private sector as regards SEND. You haven’t even tried the state option. A GP or nursery owner aren’t going to be able to give you educational advice and a teacher’s advice is subjective.

bafta16 · Today 16:29

SometimesInTheFall2 · Today 15:31

In what sense exactly? Sounds like a bit of a sweeping statement, particularly for a world-renowned HE sector (until successive governments set about destroying it through chronic under-funding).

It is a sweeping statement. I think it's terribly sad what has happened to education. Gove and his ghastly frontal adverbials. Stifling creativity.
Little children sitting for far too long, being obliged to use a pencil before they are ready. Bored out of their heads, then misdiagnosed.

ruffler45 · Today 16:29

OonaStubbs · Today 15:59

Hopefully Burnham will implement a MASSIVE crack down on crime because it is Out of Control in many parts of the country.

We will have to double/treble/quadruple the police force to even make a dent in the crime figures.

As for prison space we need to do something drastic and quick to increase it.

OneWarmHazelQuail · Today 16:32

Differentforgirls · Today 16:04

Can I ask you something? You left your house due to a traumatic incident. Did you have your children then?

Pre kids. I got the property a long time ago. I left it and asked my parents to rent it out. I moved into their house for a while and then left London for a few years altogether. I made the mistake of remortgaging from it at the peak of the market to fund a deposit for a new property. I thought I could just kick the can down the road and deal with it later.

I have seen photos of the house but I have not been there for many many years. It doesnt seem to be in a great state. I tell tenants to tell me about issues promptly and I call out people to repair as soon as possible but I haven't seen the quality of repairs myself. I never make deposit deductions and I haven't seen the property for a long time. It is rented to group of young men/students who don't reach out often.

I don't believe in raising rents once tenants are in or taking deposits. I just was satisfied with a break even point. It was never about investment or anything else. It was just like a thing in the background that I didn't like to deal with until it became a financial drain when I needed money for my son.

OP posts:
glitterpaperchain · Today 16:33

ruffler45 · Today 16:29

We will have to double/treble/quadruple the police force to even make a dent in the crime figures.

As for prison space we need to do something drastic and quick to increase it.

Oh no this is your opinion on how to deal with crime? Yikes that's sad

Differentforgirls · Today 16:34

ruffler45 · Today 16:29

We will have to double/treble/quadruple the police force to even make a dent in the crime figures.

As for prison space we need to do something drastic and quick to increase it.

Or. We could look at why people commit crime rather than locking them
up for doing it. For every person we lock up, there will be another one committing the same crime.

Locking them all away won’t stop it.

Differentforgirls · Today 16:34

glitterpaperchain · Today 16:33

Oh no this is your opinion on how to deal with crime? Yikes that's sad

Worrying actually.

Differentforgirls · Today 16:36

OneWarmHazelQuail · Today 16:32

Pre kids. I got the property a long time ago. I left it and asked my parents to rent it out. I moved into their house for a while and then left London for a few years altogether. I made the mistake of remortgaging from it at the peak of the market to fund a deposit for a new property. I thought I could just kick the can down the road and deal with it later.

I have seen photos of the house but I have not been there for many many years. It doesnt seem to be in a great state. I tell tenants to tell me about issues promptly and I call out people to repair as soon as possible but I haven't seen the quality of repairs myself. I never make deposit deductions and I haven't seen the property for a long time. It is rented to group of young men/students who don't reach out often.

I don't believe in raising rents once tenants are in or taking deposits. I just was satisfied with a break even point. It was never about investment or anything else. It was just like a thing in the background that I didn't like to deal with until it became a financial drain when I needed money for my son.

Ok. Sounds like a nightmare x. I just wondered if your little boy experienced the trauma that you did. Hope you get help to deal with it all.

LakieLady · Today 16:37

SuffolkSun · Today 14:59

Ssh, don't tell anyone but he's also a, gulp, hard-left Marxist. Yeah, I know. I've heard he plans to collectivise farms and introduce five-year plans for production of pig iron paperclips 🙂

I heard he's already scoping out suitable sites for the gulags.

SummerPeonies2026 · Today 16:39

Differentforgirls · Today 16:34

Or. We could look at why people commit crime rather than locking them
up for doing it. For every person we lock up, there will be another one committing the same crime.

Locking them all away won’t stop it.

I’ll remind you of that when it’s your dd or ds on the receiving end ! Or maybe you want criminals walking around with knives and no deterrent at all.

LakieLady · Today 16:46

SummerPeonies2026 · Today 15:23

The Labour Party should make the most of their last days in government. It’s been an abject failure, the best we can hope for is that this won’t produce a reform landslide.

They've got almost 4 years to go before they have to have a GE, so hardly the "last days".

I think a lot of things have improved since they were elected. I've been able to get an NHS dentist, for a start.

glitterpaperchain · Today 16:46

SummerPeonies2026 · Today 16:39

I’ll remind you of that when it’s your dd or ds on the receiving end ! Or maybe you want criminals walking around with knives and no deterrent at all.

Yikes...PP is talking about looking at the causes of crime in order to prevent them happening in the first place. How did you miss that