Dieting is horrendous

[SassyLemonFish]

Just looking for sympathy really.

I’ve a bmi of 28. I need to lose a lot of weight. For the last two weeks I’ve been good but MY GOD the hunger and sheer depressing nature of it all. My BMR is only 1600. Sticking to 1000 or less is so hard.

My husband, on the other hand, seems to have no hunger and amazing self control. Last night he ate a single sweet potato and declared that as his dinner. His BMR is 2700. I can see him visibly changing before my eyes.

I guess I’m just jealous.

But surely you know that everyone is different?

If we're talking about appearance rather than health... Someone with a small light frame and low muscle mass can look very fat indeed at BMI 28, and someone broad with dense bones and good muscle mass can look relatively trim. That's why BMI is a range.

After reading the OP replies and some of the controversial advice given here I assume it’s another case of inability/unwillingness to count calories correctly.

I am one of those mythical petite perimenopausal people who according to mumsnet need to eat fresh air to lose weight.

In reality I need to eat around 2100 kcal a day to maintain (yes I count). Currently eating 2600 on average because I am breastfeeding a 1 year old toddler. I am 161.5cm high - measured myself yesterday together with DC who are getting through a growth spurt, and I weigh 49.5 kilo. I would look like a skeleton on 1000, 1200 or even 1600 kcal a day and would be dead within half a year.

Of course . That’s why BMI is a load of shite and no need to mention at all the specific number as if it’s the most relevant thing I guess . And people are always using the “short people look worse with a higher bmi”. Despite being very short I never looked fat with a bmi of 25-26 and I’ve no muscles to speak of

If your BMI is 28 then I doubt you have “a lot” to lose to get into the healthy weight range. A couple of stone max surely?

BMI has a wide corridor and allows for body differences, as a tool it is blunt but surprisingly good. The people who say it’s shite usually jist dislike what it tells them.

I have lost just over 3 stone on around 1100 calories a day and am now top end healthy weight. I have not been hungry often, here is what I eat:
breakfast: egg on sourdough toast with cherry tomatoes, two egg omelette with spinach or two poached eggs on spinach. Eggs are great for stopping hunger.
Lunch: large salad with cottage cheese or Humous on 3 ryvita, or salad with hard boiled egg and quorn ham (if I didn’t have egg for breakfast.) maybe goats cheese some days. The salad needs to be big and varied to keep my interest.
Dinner: Smallish portion of what we usually have with lots of veg. I have boiled cauliflower instead of rice but sometimes have a few small potatoes. I have an apple or some berries after lunch and dinner.
I go to the gym or do exercise classes 6 days a week this makes me feel much better about myself and stops me wanting snacks. I’m not sure it actually helps weight loss but being fitter makes me energised and optimistic so well worth the effort.
At 5’2” and fast approaching 70 I need to keep calories quite low to lose weight, but I have found that as the new habits become embedded it gets lots easier, good luck OP.

are you suggesting I am fat and I don’t like that. Cos that seems to be what you are strongly implying ? Just say what you think instead of dancing around it please you sad keyboard warrior

What do you define as fat? It’s not a nice term but ultimately anything over 25 is over weight. I don’t know why you’d be annoyed at someone referring themselves a certain way, they can view their own body how they like. I have called myself fat at a much lower BMI than 27 because it was fat for me.

I just don’t call myself or other people “fat” I guess . I understand the definition of overweight thanks but I’ve never ever looked “ fat” even when my bmi was over 25 so I wouldn’t use it as a universal benchmark on a thread expecting people to know exactly what I meant about my figure . I have a flat stomach and skinny arms and legs with large breasts and when I go below 25 my face starts to look bad . Despite this people seem determined to tell me I should feel fat . Mumsnet is full of lurking fat shamers I find

That's interesting because I am the exact same height as you and heavier at 63.5kg, but if I ate 2100 calories I would definitely gain weight. I usally aim for around 1800 to comfortably maintain. I am active as well, i have a physically demanding job and two kids. I don't think we can ever really assume someone's calorie needs, we're all different

Eh? Dial down the aggression. I’m not suggesting you’re fat, don’t be ridiculous, I don’t know you, and I can’t see you.

Losing muscle on mounjaro isn't inevitable. Eating the way you are, it is. As others have said, you can't exist below your BMR and expect that existence NOT to be miserable. I've done it before. I crash dieted before my wedding. 800 calories a day. I lose 4 stone in 4 months - and had the grumps, dizziness, crushing hunger and weakness that went with that loss. Put it straight back on again as soon as I started eating normally.

You need to radically rethink your approach.

I lost my weight again using mounjaro. I am no longer using mounjaro. I am eating the same food as I did when I was, I'm not hungry all the time, I have bags of energy, I'm lifting heavy twice a week, doing pilates twice a week, yoga twice a week, fast walking every day... None of it is hard work or miserable. Because I am eating nutritionally dense food and prioritising protein and fibre.

I'm still losing weight. I'm not finding it at all difficult. Because it's just how I live now, and it's sustainable.

What you are doing isn't sustainable.

There was no need for your snide “the people who think it’s shite “ comment . Come on now . You know exactly what you were at

Wtf are you doing eating 100kcal?? Any wonder you find it too hard. No one should be eating that low. Ffs.

It's shite. My BMI is 31 - obese. I'm 5'7, 88kg (I don't weigh myself very often, I count calories and exercise every day and just crack on), and wear UK size 10 to 12.

I have more weight to lose. But not nearly as much as the amount I'd need to get into a healthy BMI zone. You can already see all my ribs, my chest and shoulders are actually a bit grim they're so bony. Thighs and tummy - yes, weight to lose. But even on my most self-loathing days, I KNOW I am not obese.

BMI is total horseshit for me.

I am 5ft 4 and my BMI was 28 (i was just over 12 stone) when I started dieting. To lose at first I was on about 1300 cals, I lost loads then I went down to 1000 when I was smaller. I have lost 4 stone but have used mounjaro. My TDEE is probably around 1300 now, I havent actually checked as am maintaining and not really counting cals currently.

For those saying BMI 28 isnt that overweight, it really does look it on some. I am a really small build and to not look chubby I need to be around 22.

Also if your BMR is 1600 that's the minimum you should be eating to live, not eat in a deficit from it, you would be starving then!

You're not doing it right if you feel hungry. No, really. This is what I got wrong all this time. If you fill yourself up with enough protein then you'll barely have space for all the veg you need!

It just shows you BMI is not a good ‘one size fits all’ tool. My BMI at my heaviest was 27.8 and, despite being a bit taller than average (5’9), I was really very fat indeed.

You also need to take it gradually, going too fast too soon will make your body go into survival mode and it does all it can to KEEP the weight. Move more and eat at fewer intervals as you can.

I see constantly here that it’s short people that look fatter with a higher bmi but maybe this is incorrect because I’ve less than half a stone to lose to get my bmi in the normal category. I’ve big boobs and I’m technically overweight but i definitely do not look fat at a glance

Cheese is full of fat, both good and bad fats. Try substituting it.

I think it could be a lot! I'm 5'3" and weigh 8st 3lb. In order to have a BMI of 28 I would have to weigh 11st 2lbs. So, I would need to lose 3 stone. I think that's a lot.

I look back at photos of me and I honestly resembled a linebacker. It’s definitely not the case that shorter looks fatter.

BMI is a height and weight calculation, so a bmi of 25 on a 5ft woman will be a much lower weight than a bmi of 25 on a 6ft woman, so no one looks fatter or thinner due to height, as height is already taken into account.

its body composition, we all carry weight differently, we all have different muscle masses and we also all have different bodies and skeletons. For example take two women the same height and one can have much longer legs and shorter torso than the other. Some are pear shaped, some apple. BMI isn’t associated with appearance, it is purely what is healthy for that height of person. Someone with a. Lot of muscle will be towards the upper end of a healthy bmi, someone with little muscle will be healthier at the lower end.

You're doing that to yourself already at 1000kcal. You're just finding it harder and not benefiting from reduced inflammation and a more level blood sugar in the process.