To just stop hiding my body?

[themiddleofourstreet]

I am a size 16-18, down from a size 32-34. I have lost a lot of weight and, as to be expected, I have a fair bit of loose skin. At the moment this seems to be centred around my arms.

I have always been insecure about it. I hated my arms at my biggest and I still don’t really like them now.

But I’m also bored of hiding them and staying away from gorgeous dresses because I’m worried that people will stare at my arms. Realistically, nobody will care, will they?

AIBU to just give up and stop hiding?

YABU - nobody wants to see that. Hide it away.

YANBU - I wouldn’t give it a second glance

YANBU, wouldn't give a second glance.

The only concern I'd raise is extra caution around sun protection and similar if around plants or things that can irritate the skin, and only because I've heard and those I know with more experience than me say that loose skin is more delicate and prone to getting more irritated and painful when those things happen, but that may be more an individual thing.

So many redfaced shirtless men with hairy backs and crap tattoos appear during the heatwave. Often a complete stranger to a pedicure too.

At least my wobbly tum was earnt through pregnancies and not just lager.

I wear what I like, as long as its not disrespectful to an occasion, and I encourage you to do the same. If they don't like it they don't have to look.

I keep looking out for this style, because elbow length dresses aren't that common, but they exist.
Hope and Ivy quite often have them but they are a bit floral for me at the moment.
And White Stuff
https://www.johnlewis.com/white-stuff-megan-v-neck-midi-dress-red/p114908879
And Sahara London (this one looks lovelier on a rounder shape than on a very slim model)
https://saharalondon.com/products/crinkle-bubble-dress-thing-ss26
And sometimes Toast
https://www.toa.st/collections/sale/products/bryn-herb-print-dress-brilliant-blue?_gl=110ea6qz_upMQ.._gaMjA4MTMzNzg5Ni4xNzgzMjU4NjA2_ga_N28MZ8GGL9*czE3ODMyNTg2MDUkbzEkZzAkdDE3ODMyNTg2MDUkajYwJGwwJGgxNzY4NDY5MTMw
https://www.toa.st/collections/sale/products/tablecloth-print-dress-soya-multi

I look first on eBay because none of these brands are that cheap.

Hope that helps.

Truthfully, when I see loose skin on people now I assume they’ve been on weight loss drugs and have lost weight too fast without trying to do any exercise!

Truthfully, I am pretty sure the OP and people like her couldn't give a flying fuck what you think! Seriously? You judge other women in that way? Need to keep yourself sexy on a permanent basis for your husband? What a life!

I take weight loss drugs. Been doing it for a year. Lost 5 stone. Not much more than a pound a week. It's certainly not been fast - no one I know who's using WLIs has lost any faster than that. And I could exercise till the cows come home but it's not going to make a difference when my skin has been stretched to 21 stone, is it?! There's only so much bouncing back to be done.

Tell me, which offends you most? Remaining morbidly obese or the inevitable saggy skin that happens however you lose the weight?

Of course you don't need to hide your body. I'd just say, wear what makes you feel good, comfortable and not too self conscious. I'm in my 50s and far from the body beautiful, but wear a bikini; my only rule is, if you're going to wear it, wear it with confidence and without comment.

I’ve lost 8 stone (bereavement stress) and I’ve got bingo wings, loose skin etc 🙄

If I need to, if I’m going out to dinner or something, I’ll dress to disguise all this, but other than that, I just dress as I like. I cannot be bothered to please others now.

@themiddleofourstreet, I am glad that you bought those dresses. Enjoy every minute of wearing them.
What helps me with things like this is not trying to persuade myself that I don't care (I KNOW I shouldn't, but I do) but knowing that it doesn't actually make a difference.
By this I mean that a chunky arm cloaked in a sleeve is still obviously a chunky arm. An overweight person wearing something black and shapeless, is still obviously overweight. We might think we are hiding something, but it never works.
If you ever watch one of those rubbishy shows like "Say yes to the dress," it is clear to see that the brides who want sleeves because they are self-conscious about their arms still look like the same bride. No-one sees a sleeve and thinks, "Oh, there's a tiny little arm in there." You still see the drape of the fabric, the volume of the arm below.
So, if it isn't working anywhere, why not be cooler, more comfortable, and in a dress or top you really like?

I think the only person who really cares about this is the person whose body it is!
Most people are more concerned with what their own bodies look like.

I do understand though. Ive gone from a 22-24 to a 10-12 and have some major loose skin (less bingo wings and more flying squirrel!!LOL). The only thing that bugs me about it is the fact I weight train and it hides my muscles somewhat.
Although TBF I dont really get my upper arms out anyways....its coz of the sun though, not aesthetics!

Ha. Not too long ago, my arms were slim, strong and very, very toned. This summer, I tried on my nice sleeveless things to discover large wodges of jelly-like flab squelching around my upper arms, forming topographically interesting extrusions as I moved around.

Half my brain instantly tuned into faux-concerned judginess, going "Oh, those poor arms! Best to wear sleeves, nobody wants to see your flab. Everyone will sneer at you."

The other half of my brain won 😎 Arms are arms, OP, and we're both getting the sun on ours! Congratulations on your weight loss.