AIBU to let my Year 5 daughter walk home alone?

[lemonbalm107]

DD will be going into year 5 in September and is sensible. Her school allows Y5 and Y6 to walk to/go home from school alone with parental permission.

what are everyone’s thoughts on this? We live a 4 minute walk from the school, with 2 residential road crossings (occasional cars, not super busy). Keen to encourage her independence but as she’s my first child I’m not sure overall.

Great to get stuff for themselves but if they’re helping mum eg to buy milk, flour, bread whatever it gives them great skills in choosing, prices, weights if applicable and responsibility and pride in being trusted, helpful and in getting it home.

And also develops confidence in dealing with adults they don't know - if they have to ask where something is, or need help reaching something on a high shelf.

Mine did it from about mid year 5 as we moved house so are about 5 mins from the school. Had no issues and she enjoys it. Most of the kids walk from our middle school and go a lot further.

Yes same as this.

Fine as long as she’s fairly sensible and had had safe road crossing drummed into her. Mine walked alone from May in Y4 on a similar journey after a few weeks of him walking 20m ahead of me to show he could consistently do it safely. He’s finishing Y6 now and since mid way through Y5 has his own keys to let himself in (we WFH)

My 7 year old (just turned 8) nephew has had road safety and stranger danger at school which is a relief for his parents. Bring back the Green Cross Code man and public information films I say!

My nephew luckily knows the very friendly staff in his local Nisa shop. God knows he spends enough there on tat and Pokemon cards. I think he’d be fine with staff he didn’t know.

My eldest 2 also did Middle School so we're allowed to walk home from Lower School in Year 4. Year 5 they were straight into walking a mile or so to the new school, crossing roads etc. There were literally hundreds of them doing it though!

I'd let her.

Because it's in daylight yes. I assume none would say yes if it was after dark?

Really? Hardly any kids played out locally in recent years. My best friend’s DC (now 25 and 23) were rarely allowed out by themselves until they were much older. Eg 10 onwards.

If it’s dusk, eg turning darker, just say to keep within streets and roads with street lights. Maybe give a torch. And don’t dawdle. It’s not like vampires and ghouls will jump out and grab them in the dusk.

It's absolutely fine in the scenario you describe. We're half a mile from school with quiet village residential roads and then a pelican crossing for the main road. Both my kids walked alone/with friends from the first day of year 5 (DD1 is a summer birthday so had only just turned ten).

I'd have more qualms in a busy town, but even then if it's a 4 minute walk it's not a big deal. And it sets them up for going to secondary school beautifully. It's a great way to learn to loosen the parental grasp too, it feels very odd to start with, but before too long you'll be waving them off and just thinking how proud you are of your independent children.

Yeah bread makers didn’t exist when I was young or else my mum would’ve bought one. I like my bread maker too. It’s good to give them options though and realise that eg if milk/butter runs out they’re more than capable of going to buy it themselves rather than their mum running ragged buying it for them. As if you don’t have enough to do first thing in the morning.

I know someone who didn't let their DDs in year 7 go home alone after dark. As in they went to school far away that they'd be back at around 5pm. So would always pick her up or get older brother to go home with her.

Still to this day (her DD is 22) doesn't want her coming back late after dark because "what if a man decides to attack you". As in after dark she'd always pick the DD up from the station, and avoid the 10 minute walk home.

Busy town you just drill into them about the different types of crossings, wait for green man, watch out for traffic and don’t rush, be slower if necessary. They soon get it.

Yeah, though I suppose our area was pretty low traffic and relatively safe. Local traffic only. Drivers were highly likely to know that there'd be kids playing out if it wasn't raining. And there were lots of us.

This is bonkers right? She tried to have an intervention because "oh god. Dd goes out late all the time. I don't like it. This isn't a safe place for girls." Sometimes her dd just ignores her and comes back at 1am.

Definitely. I'd feel more wobbly about it, maybe, but I'd still send them on their own. It's part of learning to be an adult, and holding them back does them a disservice.

Definitely bonkers. My DD1 is 12 and did after school clubs in midwinter that got her back in our village at 5pm and full dark - I was only meeting her near the bus stop because she asked me to

Dependant on alot of things length of walk ,her maturity ,would she have peers to walk with at least part of the way is area generally safe does she have a good understanding of danger ? If at least some of them are accurate I would agree even maybe meet her half way for first week or so and reaasess as night draw in etc xx

All on her own I assume?

Yup. School runs a late bus which gets to us about 5, so I'd take my book and read in the library until it arrived. Only did it 3-4 times, as the days got longer she felt more confident. Normal school finish time has never been an issue.

No

Definitely.,

It depends on the kid. My DD is a young year 5 and wasn’t ready for it this year. And we don’t live in an entirely straightforward area. We’ll work on the necessary skills over the summer and review it for Year 6.