To not let my kids appear on school social media?

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Since DC started school, I've never consented to their pictures appearing on social media.

I thought a lot of parents would do the same, but the majority of parents do seem to have consented as the social feeds are full of lovely pictures of everyone else's kids.

Last week for example, there were lots of great pictures of sports day, and the week before, pictures of a school trip.

I'm now beginning to think I'm just making myself miss out on nice pictures of DC at school events, and actually there's no a real downside to letting them be in the pictures.

What does everyone else think? AIBU to not consent, or is there a real risk to having pictures of children on open public social media?

Our school bans parents taking pictures or videos at all school events, as they don't have consent for all of the kids to be on facebook/school newsletter. It is so sad the way the world has gone.

At what point does a genuine attempt to protect our children become, in itself, harmful?
Current safety advice, particularly from the National Crime Agency, to schools is not to post photos of children online.
So no, not giving schools permission to share your child online doesn’t cause more harm.

External bodies and sporting teams also need to gain parental consent before posting children online. Not having their photo shared on Instagram doesn’t exclude the child from sport.

I already mitigate the risk of a car crash by driving carefully, using high quality car seats etc. Why does that mean I wouldn't mitigate another risk (even if that risk is smaller) by not putting my children on social media? Your logic is nonsensical.

In our case, we have managed to find activities that don't require by kid being filmed and then the footage being in the hands of people with no requirement to keep it private/safe. Stuff like swimming, dance class, music lessons etc. thankfully they can attend without anyone filming. I always appreciate when others ask if it's okay to take a video or photo for something.

I am well aware though that as they get older it becomes more and more difficult and I doubt I can keep his face offline for much longer (I'm sure it's been on there plenty I haven't known about). They're nearly seven and as they get older naturally you lose some control over stuff like this. For me, I know the future will hold plenty of them being identifiable online, but I'm glad I have reduced it as best I can while they're still too little to consent/understand what they are consenting to. I've heard of adults and teenagers being really angry and upset to find that photos of them as babies/toddlers have been put online for the whole world to see, especially embarrassing ones like nude images or filthy nappies and so forth.

It's a difficult thing to navigate.

What does the media have to do with several internet and crime bodies making very clear guidance to schools regarding this issue?
Again, typical distortion of words ..the NCA say that it MAY be a problem and RECOMMEND not to publish pictures. Because it has happen in OBE school. A far cry from how it is interpreted here! This is about protecting SCHOOLS.

So again, for all the posters who don't want their kids on school pictures because they are worried the pictures might land in the hands of callous criminals, don't you have the same concern when you take your kids to the beach?

Stuff like swimming, dance class, music lessons etc.
So you never take your kids swimming? Because you think weirdos are more likely to get pictures from parents posting on their Facebook than going to take pictures themselves? There have been reports of this happening in public pools.

What about the park, the beach, a birthday party?

It’s bizarre how obsessed you are with whether other people choose not to have their child shared online.

You’re being silly now. You are obviously pretty defensive about your wish to continue posting pictures of your child online.

Loitering around a beach or park and taking pictures of strangers children is pretty unappealing and risky. How much easier just to go onto a schools website and take their pictures without having to move from your desk. Plus you can do so from anywhere in the world.

There’s minimal upside to widely sharing a child’s picture on SM except the parents ego. The child can’t consent to it. My late teens are really really careful about what pictures they post of themselves. I never post pictures of them now without their authorisation.

Due to AI there are now even worse risks posting pictures of children in your care online for anyone to view. Doing so is reckless and naive. Maybe just about understandable a few years ago but not now.

I don't think schools would be blackmailed to prevent the release because they wouldn't try to prevent the release - how?. They and the parents would report it to the police.

There are more and more laws coming in to combat this but every time there's a new law there's a new bit of tech.

I think school social media feeds should show groups of kids with no obvious faces showing to prevent misuse.

How do they manage that when everyone has a phone these days? I remember officiating at an athletics event a few years ago where photography was banned but you still had the entitled yummy mummies filming the kids (and getting in the way of the timekeepers) and getting very stroppy when told to stop. In fact I had to tell one that if she didn't move, I was going to disqualify her child from the competition!

It’s fine to take videos and photos. Just don’t post them publicly.

But surely someone can photograph my child in public and do the same thing?

It’s bizarre how obsessed you are with whether other people choose not to have their child shared online
It's interesting how you are diverting the question when it suits.

Loitering around a beach or park and taking pictures of strangers children is pretty unappealing and risky. How much easier just to go onto a schools website and take their pictures without having to move from your desk. Plus you can do so from anywhere in the world
I disagree. Taking pictures of kids on the beach is very easy. You pretend to take a pic of your friend with the children in the background, and children in swimming suits is more more sellable than kids in school uniform.

People are attacking me because it highlights the lack of common sense of parents who focus on school pictures exclusively.

No part into this, my kids have long left school.

You’ve repeated the same idiotic question over and over like a puppet.

There is always a risk of exposing your children to things or people when in public, but most people who are not mentally ill weight up the risks and still take their child out to places like the park or beach as there is a direct benefit to them being in new places, being outside, experiencing different things, going swimming, playing with friends etc. Parents mitigate risk where they can with things in place to care for their child, like staying closer to younger children, keeping them in sight. By contrast there are risks to sharing children online but no benefit to them either.
It’s a stupid comparison lacking in reasoning and understanding.

Not that particular poster but hopefully to answer your rather daft question of course parents who don't want their children's photos on open school social media accounts are worried about anything nefarious happening to any images of their child.

Naturally I assume we all would want to safeguard our children from their images ending up in the hands of people using them in such a way. However that doesn't mean we lock them up and never take them to the beach or other places where they of course might be photographed but we're also not just blindly posting the photos for someone to use.

I'm sure you completely understood that point already though.

Parents mitigate risk where they can with things in place to care for their child, like staying closer to younger children, keeping them in sight. By contrast there are risks to sharing children online but no benefit to them either.
It’s a stupid comparison lacking in reasoning and understanding
Oh the irony! Don't you understand that the risk of harm to your children having their far away picture taken at school and put on the school website is so minimal, it hardly exists!

Mitigating risk is recognising the likelihood of the risk in the first place!

Please tell me all the benefits to a 7 year old being publicly shared online?

I did already! Not a massive benefit, but a benefit that is more significant than the minimalist almost non existent risk of harm from their school picture being exploited.

Everything with little risk, let Ali e almost négligeable risk seems to be taken away from kids nowadays. On their own, these things are not going any harm, but the moment you add it all up, it become questionable.

I can see these kids communicating on what will be the equivalent of MN forums in 20 years time criticizing their parents for leaving them totally risk adverse in their adult life.

Nope, I can see countless references to the beach, still can’t see a single benefit to allowing a school, or even a parent sharing a 7 year old online? Feel free to repeat said benefit you’re so insistent on.

I explained what an amazing time I had once with my son looking at old school pictures l. He absolutely loved these and thanked me for having kept them. He looked at the friends he had forgotten about, reminiscing about them, good times they had together. Old teachers and PAs. Encouraged to try to look for some of them online etc...

Not a change your life moment, but still a very special moment that was worth the almost non existent risk to him of having these pictures taken.

Wow, did not expect this many replies!

For the record, DC don't have phones.

This is public insta etc, not a closed group. I can see why the school does it as rolls are falling locally and one school closed recently, so they feel they need to show off what a great place it is (which is true).

We don't have an app, so if you don't consent to the open social media, you won't see pictures of your DC.

I do let my DC leave the house and walk around in public, and go in cars. I do get that everything is a risk. Staying at home forever feels like it has more impact on their lives than missing out on nice photos of them at school, but maybe I am wrong.

I can see this is lovely, but I wonder how possible it would be to scroll back to the insta feed from the school for this year in ten years time or so to show DC? Or do you mean you screenshot them and print them out?

Staying at home forever feels like it has more impact on their lives than missing out on nice photos of them at school, but maybe I am wrong
That is obvious. The point again, is that parents have a massive over-inflated view of the risk.

People do go out and take risks because it's necessary as part of normal life, yet they rarely consider the level of risk of doing so, even though it significantly higher.

Yet some focus their mind on what is a completely unlikely risk.